Guest wedding costs and gifts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can’t you skip the wedding?

No, not without a ton of grief from various family members.

Then ask them to pay for it. I would not give up my vacation for a wedding!!

[Anonymous]

We have one that will be $4000 for 3 of us. Not sure we can swing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

This is fake, right?

PP here, not fake. We actually asked for fall colors and specified red, orange, black or grey. A couple people wore navy blue and red but it was fine - all the guests looked great, our photographer complimented everyone on how well they matched. We had about 60% turnout compared to the amount of invites we sent which is pretty good for a destination wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

This is fake, right?

PP here, not fake. We actually asked for fall colors and specified red, orange, black or grey. A couple people wore navy blue and red but it was fine - all the guests looked great, our photographer complimented everyone on how well they matched. We had about 60% turnout compared to the amount of invites we sent which is pretty good for a destination wedding.

You’re a gross person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

You kept score on who did / didn’t come? You know it was an invitation and not a summons, right?These are your closest family and friends. How gauche.

[Anonymous]

$300 for attire sounds crazy to me if you aren’t actually in the wedding. I’d make do with something in my closet even if it didn’t perfectly match whatever attire they’re requesting. Use that money for a gift.

[Anonymous]

You should still give a gift but a $50 gift is totally fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

Glad I wasn't invited. I probably wouldn't have gone once the "demands" came through.

OP- don't go. Send a gift. If they are normal people they will appreciate not having to pay for you at the wedding and the fact they got a nice gift. The "gift" of your presence isn't worth the stress. Your family should understand. If they don't just make a joke about how they will sponsor you for the next one.

[Anonymous]

Just got them a fifty to seventy five dollar gift. That does t add much to what you’ve already spent and then you don’t have to worry about being seen as the cheap person who didn’t give a gift. It’s just easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

Wait you found it awkward that older established couples politely listened to your request for no gifts?! What a piece of work you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

Wait you found it awkward that older established couples politely listened to your request for no gifts?! What a piece of work you are.

+1. Such an entitled person. If I knew in advance this is the thought process for this type if a person, I wouldn’t have gone and send a small gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

You are selfish and not a good person - 'requiring' guests wear certain colors is stupid and rude. "Noticing" who doesn't give gifts when you EXPLICITLY SAID NO GIFTS makes you a terrible person. Next time you have a made for Instagram cash grab, can you have the common decency to make it domestic.

[Anonymous]

Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give.

You: don't bring a gift, flying to Europe is gift enough!
Guests: ok cool!
You:


can't imagine telling grown adults what colors to wear either. On a scale of 1 to God- what level of bridezilla were you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow this sounds like my own wedding from last month - took place in Europe, blocked hotel for $150/night, no kids allowed, guests had to wear autumn colors. Honestly we told our guests they were not expected to give a gift since it was a destination wedding, but a lot of people did give anyway and we did notice who did and who didn’t give. It was understandable for younger people in their 20s not to give but for older established folks, it was pretty awkward to see.

Unfortunately since it sounds like it’s not a destination wedding and the couple didn’t let you off the hook, I agree that you may as well suck it up and just do a 150$ gift.

If they are not expected to give a gift, you should not notice who doesn’t give gifts.

Frankly, you seem to have thrown the wedding you want and people went along with it, so you should be happy.

[Anonymous]

Honestly this is what covid is for. No way would I spend this much money on a wedding. Diestination wedding people are obnoxious. I would pretend I have covid and stay home.