Stop asking teens about college plans

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ummm what else are we supposed to conversate with your teen about? Not much else we can discuss

How was your summer
Are you doing anything fun this year sports/arts/classes
Do you have any interests outside of school
What type of music do you like, are you going to any concerts?
How is senior year going, are you going to homecoming/prom? is that not your thing?

Also, why are people spending a bunch of time with teens they don't even know. Talk about their interests.

This is less of a potential minefield than college talk? For real?

No because people don’t go with dates they just go or go in groups or they say that’s not my thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s one of the basic miscommunications. Adults fondly remember college and the 2 hours they spent applying. They have no idea what applying to college is like now. Just deflect to I haven’t decided where did YOU go to college. Most people SIL take that one and run with it.

Oy vey. Why does everyone here have to exaggerate. For 99% of kids, it is still a <2 hour affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one of the basic miscommunications. Adults fondly remember college and the 2 hours they spent applying. They have no idea what applying to college is like now. Just deflect to I haven’t decided where did YOU go to college. Most people SIL take that one and run with it.

Oy vey. Why does everyone here have to exaggerate. For 99% of kids, it is still a <2 hour affair.

Not even close

[Anonymous]

First— yes, I have a couple friends with SNs kids, so I have always asked if kids knew their plans next year. Because I know from the moms the college question hurts when college isn’t an option.

second— time for your kid to learn the art of the polite non-answer answer:

What were your SATs?
— I was pleased/satisfied with my scores with my scores

Where are you applying to college? My kid says some combo of:
— I’m looking at schools with strong foreign language departments and good music programs
— I’ve found 8 possible colleges I feel good about. We’ll see what happens this spring
— I’ll let you know as soon as admissions decisions are in

Non-answer answers

I’ve also heard kids say
— I’m not comfortable talking about it right now.

Which is fine.