Should I ask my neighbor if I can use their pool this summer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not ask - completely get the hate on asking. I would at minimum bring it up casually like "you are so lucky to have your own pool oasis in these times!" and potentially adding "our community pool is closed " and then ramble on again on how fortunate they are.

Pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not ask - completely get the hate on asking. I would at minimum bring it up casually like "you are so lucky to have your own pool oasis in these times!" and potentially adding "our community pool is closed " and then ramble on again on how fortunate they are.

Ugh, this is even worse than the OP's agenda (I didn't think that was possible until now).

At least the OP wants to come right out and ask, but to stand there pathetically & passively-aggressively hinting around for an invitation, is just doesn right icky and something that USERS do over and over again.

People like you have such obvious, transparent intentions -- I'd make you stand there for an hour and squirm. Oh, we'd have small talk about my awesome pool, and with each new comment I'd be sure to imply that I was just about to invite you and then.... say peace out.

[Anonymous]

* down

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not ask - completely get the hate on asking. I would at minimum bring it up casually like "you are so lucky to have your own pool oasis in these times!" and potentially adding "our community pool is closed " and then ramble on again on how fortunate they are.

Ugh. It's not "lucky" or "fortunate", and you sound completely entitled and clueless to assume so. We gave up a lot to get our pool. They cost a lot of money (that we had to EARN - no family support here!) and can be a pain in the butt to maintain. It also takes up your backyard so you don't have space for other things that we wanted to have.

Maybe since they're so lucky, you should offer to fix the pool cleaning equipment when it breaks. Since it's all such good luck.

[Anonymous]

OP, are you a troll? This thread is hilarious. Nice work!

[Anonymous]

Both my neighbors have gorgeous pools that are never used. One neighbor probably uses the pool 1-2 times per year when grandchildren visit. Our other neighbor is separated with grown children. No one even lives in the house let alone uses the pool.

I have also considered asking and but we don’t have a Close relationship with these people. I would never ask.

Down the street, one family has a tennis court that is also never used. I have literally never seen anyone on the courts. Our good friend is next door neighbors and was told previously our friend could use the court anytime. Our friend asked if we could play and they said yes. We never actually used the courts.

[Anonymous]

My initial response was not to ask but 9 pages later, I think we need OP to ask just to settle the issue.

Don't forget the pie a PP suggested.

[Anonymous]

Don’t ask. It’s rude.

[Anonymous]

people are really piling on. I just want to reiterate that if they wanted you over, they would have offered by now.

We have a pool and LOVE having people over. But each time friends come over, we have to do a lot of work. First, we have to clean the pool. Even though we have an auto vac, it doesn't get everything and doesn't skim the top. I still have to vacuum the pool. Empty and clean the filter. Test and add chemicals. That process can take an hour (a hot sweaty job). On top of that, visitors NEVER leave the pool area like it was when they arrived, despite best efforts. We always have to put the rafts and things back the way we like it, find little pool toys in the filter, etc. Then there's the extra dirt in the pool from kids playing. Hair, dirt, grass.

It all adds up to a lot of work and takes planning. For our family, it's totally worth it because we love the social aspect.

However, I have a friend with many kids who used to text me "hey, we'd like to come over today. Maybe in an hour?" It seemed really entitled to me, but I finally explained to her that it's a lot of work. She admitted she had no idea. She thought the pool was just always ready, or maybe we maintenanced it every morning and that it was easier than it is. She had no idea it involved planning and hard work.

Anyway, my point is they would have invited you if they were open to such a thing. And it's nothing like popping over to swing on a swing set.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I wouldn't do it because if I had a pool, I would feel extremely uncomfortable saying no, but I would have to.

Why would you have to? If this was my pool, I would let my neighbor use the pool given the circumstances.

OP: I would ask. I'd send an email, so she could think about it w/o it being awkward. I would make it incredibly clear she could say no. I would offer to chip in for pool maintenance upfront. I would say we would use it at any time that suited her. I would bring my own chairs over/not touch any of her stuff. I would make it clear that I was only asking because of COVID, etc and 100% understood that this would not continue to any other summer, etc.

Liability! And hospitality.
OP how often have you all mowed her lawn? Grabbed her paper? Shoveled snow? Checked in during the pandemic. If you had done so she probably would’ve offered her pool by now

[Anonymous]

My word! People have forgotten how to be kind and welcoming! If someone knocked on my door and asked me, I would welcome them to use my pool!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not ask - completely get the hate on asking. I would at minimum bring it up casually like "you are so lucky to have your own pool oasis in these times!" and potentially adding "our community pool is closed " and then ramble on again on how fortunate they are.

Haha I particularly love the they are older phrase. Likely they have heard this kind of ramble request before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My word! People have forgotten how to be kind and welcoming! If someone knocked on my door and asked me, I would welcome them to use my pool!

True statement of someone who has never owned s pool !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My word! People have forgotten how to be kind and welcoming! If someone knocked on my door and asked me, I would welcome them to use my pool!

Would you welcome a lawsuit, too?

[Anonymous]

OP you are a disgusting human.