Girls being physically aggressive with boys in school - "you can't hit me back bc I'm a girl!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As the father of girls, this is one area I am completely ok with having a double standard.

Complete bs. When you teach girls (and boys!) that they can be violent without impunity they keep doing it until one day one out of control person beats the shit out of them because they have no compulsions and don't care about repercussions.

+1

I teach my kids to not hit and don't let anyone hit you.

As a woman, I shudder for some of these women who are raised with the belief that men won't hit them so they can do whatever they want. When they run into the wrong guy, they get the shit beat out of them (or worse).

I don't understand why this is so hard - teach your boys and girls not to hit anyone. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - I'm glad you posted this but am shocked by many of the responses. I have 3 elementary age boys and also have taught them never to hit/hurt a girl. They have periodically questioned this when a girl has hit/hurt them and I explain that they will grow up to be physically stronger than most women and so its crucial they never hit/hurt a girl from the beginning.

Like your sons they do think this is unfair and I can't blame them! I still will continue to tell them this and to my knowledge they have never fought back. And while the problem of girls hitting boys isn't rampant / frequent and my kids have never had bruises as a result, it DOES happen. (They attend a very highly regarded elementary outside the DC area).

I too wonder why. From these responses it seems that many parents of girls don't think it's an issue and don't drill into girls not to hit?? So strange to me!!!!

My question to parents of girls - is that correct? Do you just not talk about fighting with others bc you just don't see it being a problem?

Ps. And as I wrote before my boys are taught by me that it is never ok to hit a girl and if there is a problem tell the girl to stop, walk awayand tell a teacher. So, no lecturing to me about how I am raising future wife beaters please!

I teach my girls and boys not to hit anyone. People are reacting to the idea that hitting is a girl problem rather than a kid problem. The idea that girls are the perpetrators of most school violence is so insane I can't believe it needs to be pointed out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I'm glad you posted this but am shocked by many of the responses. I have 3 elementary age boys and also have taught them never to hit/hurt a girl. They have periodically questioned this when a girl has hit/hurt them and I explain that they will grow up to be physically stronger than most women and so its crucial they never hit/hurt a girl from the beginning.

Like your sons they do think this is unfair and I can't blame them! I still will continue to tell them this and to my knowledge they have never fought back. And while the problem of girls hitting boys isn't rampant / frequent and my kids have never had bruises as a result, it DOES happen. (They attend a very highly regarded elementary outside the DC area).

I too wonder why. From these responses it seems that many parents of girls don't think it's an issue and don't drill into girls not to hit?? So strange to me!!!!

My question to parents of girls - is that correct? Do you just not talk about fighting with others bc you just don't see it being a problem?

Ps. And as I wrote before my boys are taught by me that it is never ok to hit a girl and if there is a problem tell the girl to stop, walk awayand tell a teacher. So, no lecturing to me about how I am raising future wife beaters please!

I teach my girls and boys not to hit anyone. People are reacting to the idea that hitting is a girl problem rather than a kid problem. The idea that girls are the perpetrators of most school violence is so insane I can't believe it needs to be pointed out.

No one said that most school violence is by girls. What they said is that schools Don nonviolence by girls when it occurs or take it seriously. B y this thread a lot of parents don't either

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - I'm glad you posted this but am shocked by many of the responses. I have 3 elementary age boys and also have taught them never to hit/hurt a girl. They have periodically questioned this when a girl has hit/hurt them and I explain that they will grow up to be physically stronger than most women and so its crucial they never hit/hurt a girl from the beginning.

Like your sons they do think this is unfair and I can't blame them! I still will continue to tell them this and to my knowledge they have never fought back. And while the problem of girls hitting boys isn't rampant / frequent and my kids have never had bruises as a result, it DOES happen. (They attend a very highly regarded elementary outside the DC area).

I too wonder why. From these responses it seems that many parents of girls don't think it's an issue and don't drill into girls not to hit?? So strange to me!!!!

My question to parents of girls - is that correct? Do you just not talk about fighting with others bc you just don't see it being a problem?

Ps. And as I wrote before my boys are taught by me that it is never ok to hit a girl and if there is a problem tell the girl to stop, walk awayand tell a teacher. So, no lecturing to me about how I am raising future wife beaters please!

I know someone with a daughter who is naturally just a very aggressive kid. From a very young age, her first instinct was always to hit, knock other kids over, etc. Her parents half heartedly would try to stop her, but honestly, the mom thought it was kind of bad ass that her daughter was so violent, and thought it was great she could stand up for herself. At this point, the kid has been kicked out of at least one afterschool program. It's ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I'm glad you posted this but am shocked by many of the responses. I have 3 elementary age boys and also have taught them never to hit/hurt a girl. They have periodically questioned this when a girl has hit/hurt them and I explain that they will grow up to be physically stronger than most women and so its crucial they never hit/hurt a girl from the beginning.

Like your sons they do think this is unfair and I can't blame them! I still will continue to tell them this and to my knowledge they have never fought back. And while the problem of girls hitting boys isn't rampant / frequent and my kids have never had bruises as a result, it DOES happen. (They attend a very highly regarded elementary outside the DC area).

I too wonder why. From these responses it seems that many parents of girls don't think it's an issue and don't drill into girls not to hit?? So strange to me!!!!

My question to parents of girls - is that correct? Do you just not talk about fighting with others bc you just don't see it being a problem?

Ps. And as I wrote before my boys are taught by me that it is never ok to hit a girl and if there is a problem tell the girl to stop, walk awayand tell a teacher. So, no lecturing to me about how I am raising future wife beaters please!

I teach my girls and boys not to hit anyone. People are reacting to the idea that hitting is a girl problem rather than a kid problem. The idea that girls are the perpetrators of most school violence is so insane I can't believe it needs to be pointed out.

This. And to the poster below who said no one is saying that, they absolutely are. Did you even read the comments about how girls are bitches and violent and what not?

[Anonymous]

I think some parents of girls find it amusing when their daughters are young and view them as a badass who won't take crap from anyone. It can become a bigger problem as they get older and perpetuates itself as the girl takes that persona in as part of her identity. Sometimes it seems "girl power" has gone too far.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think some parents of girls find it amusing when their daughters are young and view them as a badass who won't take crap from anyone. It can become a bigger problem as they get older and perpetuates itself as the girl takes that persona in as part of her identity. Sometimes it seems "girl power" has gone too far.

Huge problem-must be why so many more girls than boys grow up to commit violent crime. Oh, wait...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Next time she hits, teach your boys to yell, "I already told you, no matter what you do, I'm not going out with you! You are ugly and I already like someone else."

Then repeat in other conversation, Susie is getting violent because she's angry I won't go out with her/be her friend.

And yes, you CAN hit a girl. You can hit anyone who stands between you and safety.

+100

I love that response. Bitches need to learn. Words hurt girls more than fists.

I agree that girls are hurt more by words. If one is continual hitting a boy words are the only acceptable defense.

Call her fat and ugly and she'll remember it 15 years from now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think some parents of girls find it amusing when their daughters are young and view them as a badass who won't take crap from anyone. It can become a bigger problem as they get older and perpetuates itself as the girl takes that persona in as part of her identity. Sometimes it seems "girl power" has gone too far.

Huge problem-must be why so many more girls than boys grow up to commit violent crime. Oh, wait...

Why do people want to make this boys vs. girls? Why wouldn't you want to teach your children to be peaceful, kind, non-violent human beings, whether they are boys or girls? Even if you don't think it's a problem once a girl becomes a woman, do you not acknowledge that being violent and handling emotions by physically lashing out is a problem while they're a girl?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think some parents of girls find it amusing when their daughters are young and view them as a badass who won't take crap from anyone. It can become a bigger problem as they get older and perpetuates itself as the girl takes that persona in as part of her identity. Sometimes it seems "girl power" has gone too far.

Huge problem-must be why so many more girls than boys grow up to commit violent crime. Oh, wait...

People are saying that violence by both genders are wrong but teachers (and parents) such as you apparently don't take bullying and violence by girls seriously. It is a legit opinion. It's like how small dogs are more badly behaved than large dogs because they are so cute and never disciplined like large dogs are. And yes it is a problem if bullying takes place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I'm glad you posted this but am shocked by many of the responses. I have 3 elementary age boys and also have taught them never to hit/hurt a girl. They have periodically questioned this when a girl has hit/hurt them and I explain that they will grow up to be physically stronger than most women and so its crucial they never hit/hurt a girl from the beginning.

Like your sons they do think this is unfair and I can't blame them! I still will continue to tell them this and to my knowledge they have never fought back. And while the problem of girls hitting boys isn't rampant / frequent and my kids have never had bruises as a result, it DOES happen. (They attend a very highly regarded elementary outside the DC area).

I too wonder why. From these responses it seems that many parents of girls don't think it's an issue and don't drill into girls not to hit?? So strange to me!!!!

My question to parents of girls - is that correct? Do you just not talk about fighting with others bc you just don't see it being a problem?

Ps. And as I wrote before my boys are taught by me that it is never ok to hit a girl and if there is a problem tell the girl to stop, walk awayand tell a teacher. So, no lecturing to me about how I am raising future wife beaters please!

I teach my girls and boys not to hit anyone. People are reacting to the idea that hitting is a girl problem rather than a kid problem. The idea that girls are the perpetrators of most school violence is so insane I can't believe it needs to be pointed out.

No one is saying girls create the most violence. They are saying however that when girls bully parents and teachers turn a blind eye more.

[Anonymous]

The only genuine answer to this question is, what would you fell like, and actually do, if your son came back after being subjected to violence from a girl. The rest is theoretical bs. I think that most moms of boys would put aside their political correctness and seek an end to the behavior. Schools have a responsibility to end this behavior.

[Anonymous]

I've seen this dynamic at our DC's elementary. The girls will run up to the boys and push and hit them and chase them. The boys chase back but I've noticed they are very careful to not push or hit. None of the aides say anything. I wouldn't call it bullying or violence although I have seen it get pretty rough with some of the boys falling to the ground and getting scraped up. From what I've seen the girls are smart enough to play his "game" with only to some boys who can handle this type of play. I can imagine it would be a disaster if they tried to do this to some of the other boys who wouldn't think this is so amusing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your sons needs to go after the biggest most agressive girl first. He needs to beat her until she surrenders. Then the rest will leave him alone.

This is the advice I was always told. Fight the biggest bully infront of everyone and don't be afraid to die or kill.

LOL Is that how your survived long enough to escape and swim across the ocean under moonlight, to drag your exhausted naked body out of the water and crawl up the beach onto American soil? Welcome. We don't behave that way, though, just FYI. Unless you get a job as a county dog catcher.

I've been in many fights. I haven't lost yet ! Never been in trouble but I am a girl. Killing someone in self defense with your bare hands in this country can get you off. I was never even charged .

I hope everyone in my family stays away from you and your kids, if you have any.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only genuine answer to this question is, what would you fell like, and actually do, if your son came back after being subjected to violence from a girl. The rest is theoretical bs. I think that most moms of boys would put aside their political correctness and seek an end to the behavior. Schools have a responsibility to end this behavior.

Yes, of course. But neither the idea that "girls are bitches" nor "girls get away with murder" (quotes from this thread) would inform my discussion with my son or the school. Just as if a boy pulls my daughter's braid I would discuss it with her in the context of that specific child.