Why so many single men not interested in dating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's often said women don't "need" men anymore because they can support themselves economically.

But I think it's also true that men don't "need" women anymore to help maintain a home. With modern appliances and cheap dry cleaning/laundry services, meal prep services and relatively cheap takeout options, there's less of a "need" for a woman in the traditional role.

I think this partially explains why women and men are dating less, having less sex, marrying less and having fewer children.

Good points.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:It doesn't hekp when women constantly state that their minimum requirement is 6 foot tall and 200K (preferable more) income per year and between the ages of 25 and 35. That is only about 150,000 men in the US who meet the minimum eligibility requirements for all women.

Maybe adjust your age setting and check what women your own age are looking for. Then you can find an equal partner - alternate paying for dates, building a great connection not just sexual one etc. Why do you even put so much stress on sex and appearance, in your own words, your T levels are low? Just enjoy a normal human connection. Looks fade anyways over time

So women shouldn't need to change their preferences, but men should?

I date the likes: men of my own age group , looks and income.
You want to date much younger women . Maybe change your self assessment, self acceptance, acceptance of your own aging and why you think you should look attractive to much younger people

You sound self-centered. Maybe men and women don't have the same preferences. And maybe not all women have the same preferences as you.

How is that self centered dating equals ? If you want to date someone who has an asset that valuable to you that you don’t have (age, looks etc) then you need to pay up
As I clearly showed you the investment required to buy a hot young educated woman is $10 million in future divorce settlement to her , legally framed as trust to her at the time of marriage.
Young women are smart they on average make more than the men their own age group and would only date and marry much older men for real assets of interest to them

So you have totally unrealistic expectations of what you bring to table.

I have realistic expectations and have no problems finding relationships, was married for 20 years to a high profile man so my algorithm does work.

Same age=partnership based relationship

Much older man = transactional relationship

You're doing it again, where you're notion of "equal" can only be based upon your value judgements. You can't see past your own nose. You are self-centered.

I mean, a 27 yo objectively is not an equal to a 41 yo man. Your dating experience/lack of options should have already taught you this. You are single. I’m not single throughout my life just like most people who date and marry partners of about same age

So you are a social “outcast” in a way thinking that somehow a 27 yo woman who makes 150k would be an equal to a 41 yo veteran male making 150k. That’s not even close! She’s an equal with a hedge fund manager who makes a few million a year

Yup. You seem very set in your ways and think your ways are THE way. Says enough about you. Enjoy.

Her ways are THE way. Make fast friends with your left hand.

LOL, are you one of those typical "women are more than their sexuality" types who always try to shame men by reference to....their access to a woman's sexuality? Well done...

[Anonymous]

A lot of stubborn old and mad women in this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a married man I find this thread very interesting with different viewpoints. I feel like I hit the jackpot with my wife. I am 48 and she is 39.. She helped me grow in ways I can't even describe.

If I may have an opinion, I think it has to do with information overload. Then you will argue why doesn't it apply to women since they are similarly overloaded.

We have twins boy/girl. The boy gets extremely disinterested in everything but his video games. His sister meanwhile call her friend, watch a show, practice some dance move, and "bother me" (I love it) while during the same hours her brother is playing video games. And the results are evident in school as well. My daughter is in averaging 98% in every subject while her brother is just average. They are both 13. We had him tested, but nothing came out of it. If it continues we may seek a different opinion. Someone told me it maybe ADHD/autism.

I played video games as well. But I also played basketball outside. I was outside for hours riding my bike doing stupid stuff with my friends in the neighborhood etc. I don't see a lot of it in the suburbs where you would think it's safer. I grew up in Queens and the kids are still have the same experience I have had. Maybe it's regional. Maybe in different part of the country we don't see as many single men.

I don't know. If you are single man, don't give up on pursing a relationship. It may change your life in a positive way.

Here is the million dollar question: you are a father, you see the burgeoning issue with your son. What are you doing about it in a practical sense - not just getting a label so he has educational accommodations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For 35 plus and divorced men, flirting and asking someone out is really high stakes stuff. Most people are at work at that stage in life, which is where you meet people. But if a man gets that wrong and gets shot down for a coffee, that can be pretty darn devastating for careers and the work environment. So most men won't engage with colleagues these days.

So that leaves online, which has its issues.

If looking for a partner, I don't think this is a man or woman issue. We don't seem to have neutral third spaces where people can meet each other organically. But the costs are much higher for men who choose to flirt these days. So any man that has professional ambitions shuts that down. The risk-reward calculation is very unfavorable. Even when they really like someone. Don't go there is what every ambitious man has internalized.

And the apps are garbage these days. So, many men are checked out. Not because they don't want to meet a partner, but because there are few healthy and interesting ways to get to know someone in a non-dating context.

So men choose careers where they have no time after work and then whine about not having time to meet women. Got it. If everyone refused to work 60 hour weeks, 3 employees would have to do the work currently done by w employees, and these men would have more time. But nope, men want to work "hard" because money is e erything. Yet money cannot buy them partners. Poor men. Booboo!

I am an engineer, aren't women dominating the legal field?. I think lawyers work long hours no? I don't think men are necessarily working longer hours. Maybe they spend more hours in the office while their equally busy wives bring work home and does it after everyone goes to bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:For 35 plus and divorced men, flirting and asking someone out is really high stakes stuff. Most people are at work at that stage in life, which is where you meet people. But if a man gets that wrong and gets shot down for a coffee, that can be pretty darn devastating for careers and the work environment. So most men won't engage with colleagues these days.

So that leaves online, which has its issues.

If looking for a partner, I don't think this is a man or woman issue. We don't seem to have neutral third spaces where people can meet each other organically. But the costs are much higher for men who choose to flirt these days. So any man that has professional ambitions shuts that down. The risk-reward calculation is very unfavorable. Even when they really like someone. Don't go there is what every ambitious man has internalized.

And the apps are garbage these days. So, many men are checked out. Not because they don't want to meet a partner, but because there are few healthy and interesting ways to get to know someone in a non-dating context.

So men choose careers where they have no time after work and then whine about not having time to meet women. Got it. If everyone refused to work 60 hour weeks, 3 employees would have to do the work currently done by w employees, and these men would have more time. But nope, men want to work "hard" because money is e erything. Yet money cannot buy them partners. Poor men. Booboo!

I am an engineer, aren't women dominating the legal field?. I think lawyers work long hours no? I don't think men are necessarily working longer hours. Maybe they spend more hours in the office while their equally busy wives bring work home and does it after everyone goes to bed.

If you are single and working 40 hours a week, you have time to meet women organically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had a number of relationships before but it’s clear only top tier men get genuine unconditional interest from their partners.

I have lots of female friends of all ages (involved in a bunch of fitness stuff so have become friends with in shape women 20-55) but it’s obvious seeing how women who truly desire their partners treat men vs where partnership is always “negotiated”

Not interested in the latter anymore.

I wish more men who are single can witness how much women go above and beyond for a man who they truly love and who replicates in turn. The relationship will.never be equal, she will always voluntarily do more and in ways that you will only realize with time.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The lack of feminine women is a disincentive. No man wants to get involved with a nutty liberal feminist. Those who do are settling for lack of better options. Yes DCUM this means you. You'll never find out how your whipped husbands feel because they are not allowed to have their own opinions.

On any weekend in the DC suburbs, I often see male/female couples out in public together, but it’s nearly impossible to distinguish the woman from the man as far as clothing and other aspects of her appearance.

That type of women’s behavior happens far less in Europe. It’s less frequent in most parts of the world.

What the hell are you taking about? I find American women very feminine. In fact, the way women here take on the household responsibilities and excuse their husbands/boyfriends behavior is quite interesting to see. I'm front West Africa. In my country at least, the women who are as educated as American women are extremely masculine and very independent. I always find it weird and bizarre when some men in this country think women from other countries are mode "docile". You will be surprised lol!

To each their own, but I find American women very sexy, beautiful and gorgeous..and they are not afraid to embrace their feminity.

Maybe we live in different universes within the same country.

DP.

I don't know what part of West Africa you are from, but certainly not from my part of West Africa. In the West Africa I know, a man without money is lost. Women and men there expect men to be providers even when the women are well educated and hogh earners. A good number of women who earn as much as their husbands do not " formally" contribute towards the finances at home. Her money is hers, and his money belongs to both of them. West Africa is a rich man's dream and a poor man's hell. Women in West Africa do not dress similar to their men, and they do dress up for every small outing or occasion.

I will be very surprised if this is still the case. Africa has the highest growth of women now leading households. Divorce rates are skyrocketing as well. Fertility while still high is starting to decrease as well.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The lack of feminine women is a disincentive. No man wants to get involved with a nutty liberal feminist. Those who do are settling for lack of better options. Yes DCUM this means you. You'll never find out how your whipped husbands feel because they are not allowed to have their own opinions.

On any weekend in the DC suburbs, I often see male/female couples out in public together, but it’s nearly impossible to distinguish the woman from the man as far as clothing and other aspects of her appearance.

That type of women’s behavior happens far less in Europe. It’s less frequent in most parts of the world.

What the hell are you taking about? I find American women very feminine. In fact, the way women here take on the household responsibilities and excuse their husbands/boyfriends behavior is quite interesting to see. I'm front West Africa. In my country at least, the women who are as educated as American women are extremely masculine and very independent. I always find it weird and bizarre when some men in this country think women from other countries are mode "docile". You will be surprised lol!

To each their own, but I find American women very sexy, beautiful and gorgeous..and they are not afraid to embrace their feminity.

Maybe we live in different universes within the same country.

DP.

I don't know what part of West Africa you are from, but certainly not from my part of West Africa. In the West Africa I know, a man without money is lost. Women and men there expect men to be providers even when the women are well educated and hogh earners. A good number of women who earn as much as their husbands do not " formally" contribute towards the finances at home. Her money is hers, and his money belongs to both of them. West Africa is a rich man's dream and a poor man's hell. Women in West Africa do not dress similar to their men, and they do dress up for every small outing or occasion.

I will be very surprised if this is still the case. Africa has the highest growth of women now leading households. Divorce rates are skyrocketing as well. Fertility while still high is starting to decrease as well.

This is still the case. I have plenty of family back home, and I go back almost every year. It is changing fast, but it is going to take quite a few generations to change much for high income households.

And yes, the men cheat a lot!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had a number of relationships before but it’s clear only top tier men get genuine unconditional interest from their partners.

I have lots of female friends of all ages (involved in a bunch of fitness stuff so have become friends with in shape women 20-55) but it’s obvious seeing how women who truly desire their partners treat men vs where partnership is always “negotiated”

Not interested in the latter anymore.

I wish more men who are single can witness how much women go above and beyond for a man who they truly love and who replicates in turn. The relationship will.never be equal, she will always voluntarily do more and in ways that you will only realize with time.

Emphasis on men who replicate. Women go above and beyond for years, and then one day, they are just done because men tend not to replicate. Most men are very nice while dating and turn to self centered slobs once they get married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had a number of relationships before but it’s clear only top tier men get genuine unconditional interest from their partners.

I have lots of female friends of all ages (involved in a bunch of fitness stuff so have become friends with in shape women 20-55) but it’s obvious seeing how women who truly desire their partners treat men vs where partnership is always “negotiated”

Not interested in the latter anymore.

I wish more men who are single can witness how much women go above and beyond for a man who they truly love and who replicates in turn. The relationship will.never be equal, she will always voluntarily do more and in ways that you will only realize with time.

Emphasis on men who replicate. Women go above and beyond for years, and then one day, they are just done because men tend not to replicate. Most men are very nice while dating and turn to self centered slobs once they get married.

Women typically discount all of the things men do for them. They treat men like mules. See, aren't generalizations fun?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had a number of relationships before but it’s clear only top tier men get genuine unconditional interest from their partners.

I have lots of female friends of all ages (involved in a bunch of fitness stuff so have become friends with in shape women 20-55) but it’s obvious seeing how women who truly desire their partners treat men vs where partnership is always “negotiated”

Not interested in the latter anymore.

I wish more men who are single can witness how much women go above and beyond for a man who they truly love and who replicates in turn. The relationship will.never be equal, she will always voluntarily do more and in ways that you will only realize with time.

Emphasis on men who replicate. Women go above and beyond for years, and then one day, they are just done because men tend not to replicate. Most men are very nice while dating and turn to self centered slobs once they get married.

Women typically discount all of the things men do for them. They treat men like mules. See, aren't generalizations fun?

What do men do for them that they don't see? Examples please.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I mean, read this forum. Read this thread.

It’s a miracle anyone dates anyone when these are the people you could encounter.

Yea, men ugly inside and outside. This forum makes it really unattractive to me as a woman to go out and date. They hate “older women” eg essentially all women of their own age group are somehow “old hags”. Yakis

This is the first question I ask at date 1: what is your dating range? If I smell crap like that even closely, I’m out with speed of light

I'm 48, truly am looking for a relationship, and say 40-52, and don't mention regularly sleeping with 22-28yos between partners.

I can still smell it afar by how they react to my body, perform, compliment me, sex safety habits etc
It’s very easy to see when a man is head over toes for me and this is a huge sexual turn on for women.

No woman will be sexually vulnerable and interested in bed with someone like women haters Papa

So you want to be worshiped for your mediocrity? Sounds like a you problem. Seek help for your insecurities.

What so funny to me is that you don’t even realize how these comments show how bad you are in bed.

Here goes the typical shaming response because your droopy body doesn't quite do it for a guy. Save it.

Keep telling on yourself.

Those weren't the same people responding to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son got married last summer..he had 8 groomsmen. My son is 31. I don't know the ages of all the groomsmen, but they are around his age. I know 4 are definitely single because they are my son's closest friends. To make a long story short tell me why none of those guys approached any of the women that were equally single??

I think men are suffering from anxiety probably more than we want to admit. And if that's the case we need fix it asap because our society still operates on the "male protector" mindset. We can't hand our "protection " due to a bunch of anxious people who can't admit they are.

A lot of men today can't even make eye contact, they wouldn't know how to approach a woman and find something about her that they instantly like.

These men grew up in an atmosphere where every interaction is liable to be filmed and ridiculed. This is why no one dances anymore either. Instead of being embarrassed in front of a roomful of people you can be humiliated in front of the entire internet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son got married last summer..he had 8 groomsmen. My son is 31. I don't know the ages of all the groomsmen, but they are around his age. I know 4 are definitely single because they are my son's closest friends. To make a long story short tell me why none of those guys approached any of the women that were equally single??

I think men are suffering from anxiety probably more than we want to admit. And if that's the case we need fix it asap because our society still operates on the "male protector" mindset. We can't hand our "protection " due to a bunch of anxious people who can't admit they are.

A lot of men today can't even make eye contact, they wouldn't know how to approach a woman and find something about her that they instantly like.

These men grew up in an atmosphere where every interaction is liable to be filmed and ridiculed. This is why no one dances anymore either. Instead of being embarrassed in front of a roomful of people you can be humiliated in front of the entire internet.

That could be true, but cowering in fear is a turn off. Taking a bit of a risk and a show of confidence is incredibly attractive.