What is the desired outcome?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our priority has been 8 hours sleep, free time for friends/family, only do what you enjoy. But no slacking on homework or in school as in not preparing for tests. But otherwise FU to college admissions.

We had this on repeat at home "T20 is a lottery. People spend optimizing their whole 4 years of HS for getting into T20. Since we are not doing that, your chances are even less than most. Plenty of good colleges to choose from outside of T50."

Made sure we visited safest of the safety college, even though it does not track demonstrated interest.

Ended up at HYPSM.

Fiction

Whatever it takes for you to cope.

I think the college consultant industry has convinced parents that the only way to get into these schools is to have students whose lives were curated from birth. And this is true for a certain percentage of each class but a large portion of each class are getting in with great stats, great recommendations and great essays. And yes great ECs even if it's not a non-profit feeding a thousand hungry children in Ukraine. For a large portion of the admits at these top schools, it gets a bit random after you get the top stats.

I was convinced too and that is the reason I kept the expectations low for my kid. Only after I actually experienced the results for my 1st kid and saw the results of the peer group whom I have coached and/or chaperoned on a few long drives, did I actually came to understand that college consultant industry did a number on the parents.

Or parents who place their kids in private high schools assuming better college placements. The kids I taught in Catholic 6-8 ended up where expected according to their middle school grades/study habits. Smart kids got into better colleges no matter if they went to public HS (from Langley to Annadale) or private. Kids with lower middle school grades got into lower ranked universities. There were very surprises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our priority has been 8 hours sleep, free time for friends/family, only do what you enjoy. But no slacking on homework or in school as in not preparing for tests. But otherwise FU to college admissions.

We had this on repeat at home "T20 is a lottery. People spend optimizing their whole 4 years of HS for getting into T20. Since we are not doing that, your chances are even less than most. Plenty of good colleges to choose from outside of T50."

Made sure we visited safest of the safety college, even though it does not track demonstrated interest.

Ended up at HYPSM.

Fiction

Whatever it takes for you to cope.

I think the college consultant industry has convinced parents that the only way to get into these schools is to have students whose lives were curated from birth. And this is true for a certain percentage of each class but a large portion of each class are getting in with great stats, great recommendations and great essays. And yes great ECs even if it's not a non-profit feeding a thousand hungry children in Ukraine. For a large portion of the admits at these top schools, it gets a bit random after you get the top stats.

I was convinced too and that is the reason I kept the expectations low for my kid. Only after I actually experienced the results for my 1st kid and saw the results of the peer group whom I have coached and/or chaperoned on a few long drives, did I actually came to understand that college consultant industry did a number on the parents.

Or parents who place their kids in private high schools assuming better college placements. The kids I taught in Catholic 6-8 ended up where expected according to their middle school grades/study habits. Smart kids got into better colleges no matter if they went to public HS (from Langley to Annadale) or private. Kids with lower middle school grades got into lower ranked universities. There were very surprises.

Okay. By middle School, it's generally pretty clear the level to which a person might be academically inclined. And so what? Middle school and high school is not exactly so much fun for the super geeks.

When it comes to higher education, let them go off and have super geek colleges. I don't see what is wrong with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our priority has been 8 hours sleep, free time for friends/family, only do what you enjoy. But no slacking on homework or in school as in not preparing for tests. But otherwise FU to college admissions.

We had this on repeat at home "T20 is a lottery. People spend optimizing their whole 4 years of HS for getting into T20. Since we are not doing that, your chances are even less than most. Plenty of good colleges to choose from outside of T50."

Made sure we visited safest of the safety college, even though it does not track demonstrated interest.

Ended up at HYPSM.

Fiction

Whatever it takes for you to cope.

I think the college consultant industry has convinced parents that the only way to get into these schools is to have students whose lives were curated from birth. And this is true for a certain percentage of each class but a large portion of each class are getting in with great stats, great recommendations and great essays. And yes great ECs even if it's not a non-profit feeding a thousand hungry children in Ukraine. For a large portion of the admits at these top schools, it gets a bit random after you get the top stats.

I was convinced too and that is the reason I kept the expectations low for my kid. Only after I actually experienced the results for my 1st kid and saw the results of the peer group whom I have coached and/or chaperoned on a few long drives, did I actually came to understand that college consultant industry did a number on the parents.

Or parents who place their kids in private high schools assuming better college placements. The kids I taught in Catholic 6-8 ended up where expected according to their middle school grades/study habits. Smart kids got into better colleges no matter if they went to public HS (from Langley to Annadale) or private. Kids with lower middle school grades got into lower ranked universities. There were very surprises.

Okay. By middle School, it's generally pretty clear the level to which a person might be academically inclined. And so what? Middle school and high school is not exactly so much fun for the super geeks.

When it comes to higher education, let them go off and have super geek colleges. I don't see what is wrong with that.

I was responding to the earlier poster than mentioned how hiring college counselors sometimes didn’t make a big difference in admissions.

Sure, kids have many more options to find colleges that match their vibes.

Sending your average kid to private high school may not have the ROI expected.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our priority has been 8 hours sleep, free time for friends/family, only do what you enjoy. But no slacking on homework or in school as in not preparing for tests. But otherwise FU to college admissions.

We had this on repeat at home "T20 is a lottery. People spend optimizing their whole 4 years of HS for getting into T20. Since we are not doing that, your chances are even less than most. Plenty of good colleges to choose from outside of T50."

Made sure we visited safest of the safety college, even though it does not track demonstrated interest.

Ended up at HYPSM.

Fiction

Whatever it takes for you to cope.

I think the college consultant industry has convinced parents that the only way to get into these schools is to have students whose lives were curated from birth. And this is true for a certain percentage of each class but a large portion of each class are getting in with great stats, great recommendations and great essays. And yes great ECs even if it's not a non-profit feeding a thousand hungry children in Ukraine. For a large portion of the admits at these top schools, it gets a bit random after you get the top stats.

I was convinced too and that is the reason I kept the expectations low for my kid. Only after I actually experienced the results for my 1st kid and saw the results of the peer group whom I have coached and/or chaperoned on a few long drives, did I actually came to understand that college consultant industry did a number on the parents.

Or parents who place their kids in private high schools assuming better college placements. The kids I taught in Catholic 6-8 ended up where expected according to their middle school grades/study habits. Smart kids got into better colleges no matter if they went to public HS (from Langley to Annadale) or private. Kids with lower middle school grades got into lower ranked universities. There were very surprises.

Okay. By middle School, it's generally pretty clear the level to which a person might be academically inclined. And so what? Middle school and high school is not exactly so much fun for the super geeks.

When it comes to higher education, let them go off and have super geek colleges. I don't see what is wrong with that.

I was responding to the earlier poster than mentioned how hiring college counselors sometimes didn’t make a big difference in admissions.

Sure, kids have many more options to find colleges that match their vibes.

Sending your average kid to private high school may not have the ROI expected.

I wouldn't look at at high school as an roi in terms of college admissions. Get the best education you can in high school and grow and mature.

[Anonymous]

Our goal is a job offer and zero student debt in an environment they enjoyed for 4 years.


I love this attitude and that is what we have instilled in our kids. A college freshman thriving at a “second tier school”. A high school junior who is seeing the success and happiness of college sibling has made her reframe her college “wants”.