Allow sleepovers with boyfriend at 18?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18, a senior, and a very strong, hard working student (headed to T5 in the fall). She’s been dating her boyfriend her about 6 or 7 months, they have a very healthy & respectful relationship. He’s also 18, very smart and nice kid, and we know him and his family. She’s recently asked if we’d allow him to sleepover at our house or for her to sleep at his. On one hand, this feels like a clear no for us; on the other hand, she’s 18 so we’re trying to balance appropriate boundaries while she becomes more independent.

For parents who’ve btdt, did you allow sleepovers at 18? If so, under what rules/conditions?

Literally she’s an adult.

I had a boy come my freshman year in college go Christmas and my parents set him up in the spare room they knew we were having sex, but they were the “not in my house” parents. I respected their boundaries. It’s ok to say no. It’s also ok to say yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. BTDT. Son is a college freshman. His girlfriend started occasional sleepovers when he was in his HS senior year. My thought process is, if they’re going to have sex, they’re going to have it somewhere. Might as well be someplace safe. Her parents are never home, so they could have opted to just be at her place. I wanted to keep an open and honest relationship with my son and not have him rarely home and at her house instead.

Boy moms know they won't be the ones taking care of the baby that comes from these sleepovers. Easy to be cavalier on that side.

BS this is so irresponsible in the age of DNA. Plus I’d want to know all my grandchildren

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. BTDT. Son is a college freshman. His girlfriend started occasional sleepovers when he was in his HS senior year. My thought process is, if they’re going to have sex, they’re going to have it somewhere. Might as well be someplace safe. Her parents are never home, so they could have opted to just be at her place. I wanted to keep an open and honest relationship with my son and not have him rarely home and at her house instead.

Boy moms know they won't be the ones taking care of the baby that comes from these sleepovers. Easy to be cavalier on that side.

Forced births aren't legal in most parts of the country... yet. You can nip it in the bud before the parasite takes hold.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is 18, a senior, and a very strong, hard working student (headed to T5 in the fall). She’s been dating her boyfriend her about 6 or 7 months, they have a very healthy & respectful relationship. He’s also 18, very smart and nice kid, and we know him and his family. She’s recently asked if we’d allow him to sleepover at our house or for her to sleep at his. On one hand, this feels like a clear no for us; on the other hand, she’s 18 so we’re trying to balance appropriate boundaries while she becomes more independent.

For parents who’ve btdt, did you allow sleepovers at 18? If so, under what rules/conditions?

Literally she’s an adult.

I had a boy come my freshman year in college go Christmas and my parents set him up in the spare room they knew we were having sex, but they were the “not in my house” parents. I respected their boundaries. It’s ok to say no. It’s also ok to say yes.

And I bet you snuck up there in the middle of the night...

[Anonymous]

But but but she’s t5

[Anonymous]

Do people think sex can only happen at night? If you’re not comfortable with the BF staying over at your house, your daughter and her BF should respect that. If the BF’s parents aren’t comfortable with your daughter staying at their house, she and her BF should respect that, too (and if his parents are okay with it and your daughter wants to stay over, you should respect it because she’s 18 and it’s not your house). But if they want to have sex, they’re already doing it or will do it whether they’re sleeping over or not.

[Anonymous]

May I ask if it is normally the mom or the dad does not want their son or daughter to have sex in the house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do people think sex can only happen at night? If you’re not comfortable with the BF staying over at your house, your daughter and her BF should respect that. If the BF’s parents aren’t comfortable with your daughter staying at their house, she and her BF should respect that, too (and if his parents are okay with it and your daughter wants to stay over, you should respect it because she’s 18 and it’s not your house). But if they want to have sex, they’re already doing it or will do it whether they’re sleeping over or not.

Of course not but doesn't mean you have to condone it. Most kids are going to drink and try weed in high school doesn't mean I have to open up my house for them to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do people think sex can only happen at night? If you’re not comfortable with the BF staying over at your house, your daughter and her BF should respect that. If the BF’s parents aren’t comfortable with your daughter staying at their house, she and her BF should respect that, too (and if his parents are okay with it and your daughter wants to stay over, you should respect it because she’s 18 and it’s not your house). But if they want to have sex, they’re already doing it or will do it whether they’re sleeping over or not.

No, but you obviously can only get pregnant from sex at night. duh. And in beds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people think sex can only happen at night? If you’re not comfortable with the BF staying over at your house, your daughter and her BF should respect that. If the BF’s parents aren’t comfortable with your daughter staying at their house, she and her BF should respect that, too (and if his parents are okay with it and your daughter wants to stay over, you should respect it because she’s 18 and it’s not your house). But if they want to have sex, they’re already doing it or will do it whether they’re sleeping over or not.

No, but you obviously can only get pregnant from sex at night. duh. And in beds.

😂

[Anonymous]

I wouldnt