What leads grown women to post party photos on Instagram stories?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are grown women even on Instagram? Why do they care about Instagram?
One of the nice things about being an adult is that high school is OVER and none of this shit matters.

Log off, go outside, read a book, and GROW UP. This is teenaged nonsense.

As you post on an anon message board. Um k.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

this attitude is why y’all don’t get invited anywhere.

DP. We get invited plenty of places. You’ll just never know about it, because why would you need to?

Fab. Then can you also add “whining about being left out” to the list of things I don’t need to know about from you? Xoxo have a great day!!!!

I don’t feel left out, I just think it’s tacky. If you don’t want to know that about me, then maybe DCUM just isn’t for you.

People who get “invited plenty of places” and have a full life do NOT get bothered when they see others living their life via IG. They don’t. So if it bothers you, even just because you think it’s “tacky” that’s telling.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

this attitude is why y’all don’t get invited anywhere.

DP. We get invited plenty of places. You’ll just never know about it, because why would you need to?

Fab. Then can you also add “whining about being left out” to the list of things I don’t need to know about from you? Xoxo have a great day!!!!

I don’t feel left out, I just think it’s tacky. If you don’t want to know that about me, then maybe DCUM just isn’t for you.

People who get “invited plenty of places” and have a full life do NOT get bothered when they see others living their life via IG. They don’t. So if it bothers you, even just because you think it’s “tacky” that’s telling.

We can agree to disagree. It’s ok. My friends don’t do this kind of thing. We’re all good.

[Anonymous]

I don't use social media much anymore, and have also reached a point in my life where I don't feel so hurt by being left out of something (post-Covid, I'm more likely to feel relieved by it).

BUT I do remember a time in my life when I was in a social circle that posted stuff like this constantly to social media, and I was very active on Facebook and Instagram at that time and felt inundated by it and it contributed to me feeling very socially insecure. There was this Mindy Kaling book that came out around that time -- Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? It really captured the feeling. I don't think I was a uniquely insecure person, I just think that era of my life (which for me was early 30s, when there are lots of parties, weddings, showers, bachelorettes, etc. to be included in or left out from) really pushed my insecurity button hard. There were also all these behaviors that I noticed were especially exclusionary. People didn't just post a lot of photos from events, they also wrote lots of public comments rehashing the events, would post inside jokes referencing stuff that happened at parties, that kind of thing. It was hard if you couldn't make an event, much less if you weren't invited at all. Worse than high school, honestly.

I am so glad to be out of that phase of life (and, honestly, no longer friends with the vast majority of that group, who turned out to be pretty shallow friends), but I remember it very well. It's why I don't post those kinds of photos, even now. My heart goes out to OP and to anyone who feels that way. Feeling excluded and left out is a very specific sort of psychic pain, and if you've ever experienced it, I really don't know how you could be as rude as some of these posters are being about it. It hurts!