What leads grown women to post party photos on Instagram stories?

[Anonymous]

Why are grown women even on Instagram? Why do they care about Instagram?
One of the nice things about being an adult is that high school is OVER and none of this shit matters.

Log off, go outside, read a book, and GROW UP. This is teenaged nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Ugh, my neighbor does exactly this, but on FB. It's beyond tiresome and childish.

[Anonymous]

I have parties like this but don’t post them on Instagram. It’s tacky, tacky, tacky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh, my neighbor does exactly this, but on FB. It's beyond tiresome and childish.

Why are you even seeing this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a question. So Op's neighbor was wrong to post party pics on Instagram because people who weren't invited could see. Got it.

So then...should the party also be indoors? Someone who wasn't invited could walk by and see. Oh, and while we're at it, the lights should be off - someone passing by the house could notice the lights on and realize there's a party going on and feel left out. And don't forget, when the hostess is shopping for party supplies she shouldn't mention it's for a party because someone at the store might overhear and feel left out.

Absolutely ridiculous. It's okay to feel left out! Really, I've felt left out before and it stings a bit. What's not okay is to be so sensitive that others can't have fun without you. That's a surefire recipe for continuing to feel left out, because people will think you're annoying and stop inviting you to things.

This is not an equal comparison. Blasting photos on social media is different than walking by someone’s house and noticing they are having a party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a question. So Op's neighbor was wrong to post party pics on Instagram because people who weren't invited could see. Got it.

So then...should the party also be indoors? Someone who wasn't invited could walk by and see. Oh, and while we're at it, the lights should be off - someone passing by the house could notice the lights on and realize there's a party going on and feel left out. And don't forget, when the hostess is shopping for party supplies she shouldn't mention it's for a party because someone at the store might overhear and feel left out.

Absolutely ridiculous. It's okay to feel left out! Really, I've felt left out before and it stings a bit. What's not okay is to be so sensitive that others can't have fun without you. That's a surefire recipe for continuing to feel left out, because people will think you're annoying and stop inviting you to things.

This is not an equal comparison. Blasting photos on social media is different than walking by someone’s house and noticing they are having a party.

+1, the PP is being dramatic for effect, but unless OP was complaining about seeing/hearing her neighbor’s party, it’s not relevant.

Of course we can all assume that people in our social circle are getting together without us. I don’t see everyone I know every single weekend— I don’t assume they are just at home waiting for me to call. Some of them know each other better than they know me. Of course they are hanging out, having parties, doing fun things. So am I.

But by now we all understand that there is something about social media that makes people feel more excluded. I don’t know exactly why but it does. So I don’t post my parties and outings to SM. This is the evolved etiquette. The potential harm of making others feel excluded outweighs the benefit to sharing (which, if I’m honest with myself, was always about bragging for me, showing off how cool and fun my life is). It’s not much to give up, honestly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

I love when you make any point on DCUM the respondent immediately assumes you do that thing. I can say there’s nothing wrong with what the other woman did while not necessarily doing it myself because this thread is not about me, it’s about someone else.

[Anonymous]

I know this isn’t the focus of OP’s thread, but I feel it’s especially annoying to post something like that to Stories instead of a regular post because then the person who posted knows I saw. Even if I was just flipping through everyone’s stories and came across that one, it annoys me that they will know I saw. If I’m going to feel left out, I’d prefer to do it privately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

I love when you make any point on DCUM the respondent immediately assumes you do that thing. I can say there’s nothing wrong with what the other woman did while not necessarily doing it myself because this thread is not about me, it’s about someone else.

DP. The PP is saying “you” in the general sense. This site is anonymous so no one cares what you do in your actual life. PP is not personally bothered by what YOU actually do (since she’d have no way of knowing), she’s just speaking generally about what people do and what she thinks of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

this attitude is why y’all don’t get invited anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

this attitude is why y’all don’t get invited anywhere.

DP. We get invited plenty of places. You’ll just never know about it, because why would you need to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

this attitude is why y’all don’t get invited anywhere.

DP. We get invited plenty of places. You’ll just never know about it, because why would you need to?

Fab. Then can you also add “whining about being left out” to the list of things I don’t need to know about from you? Xoxo have a great day!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This brings me to tears. I want to give all the people feeling left out a great big hug.

Oh but they don’t feel left out! They get invited plenty of places, they just don’t feel the need to show off!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op the truth is she didn’t think about you seeing them at all. You’re not a factor for her. I know it sounds mean to say it that way but it’s true and it’s nicer than you thinking she posted them knowing you’d see them and wonder why you weren’t invited. She just didn’t think of you at all. She’s probably nice when you run into her because you’re just a regular person to her but clearly you’re not in her inner friendship circle and that is ok. You are acquaintances.

Right. They don't think about others. We know. They are vain narcissists.

I know you know this, but that’s ridiculous. People are allowed to live their life without considering every random tangentially connected person in their entire sphere. She had a party with her friends, why would she worry about what one of the other 1,000 people who live in that neighborhood thought of it?

Go ahead and live your life. Nobody is stopping you. But people are entitled to their thoughts and opinions about the things you do. You're revealing how tacky and ridiculous you are. But since you don't care no need to worry about it.

this attitude is why y’all don’t get invited anywhere.

DP. We get invited plenty of places. You’ll just never know about it, because why would you need to?

Fab. Then can you also add “whining about being left out” to the list of things I don’t need to know about from you? Xoxo have a great day!!!!

I don’t feel left out, I just think it’s tacky. If you don’t want to know that about me, then maybe DCUM just isn’t for you.