Marrying a nice rich guy
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Anonymous
| Are you gorgeous? That certainly helps. I have a gorgeous, flirtatious friend who was basically a secretary at a hedge fund. She was always meeting and dating very wealthy men. Unfortunately none of them married her and saw her just as someone to sleep with. She's now mid40s and still single although still dating plenty of rich men. I also know of another woman who was a secretary at a recruiter for finance positions and met her now-rich husband there. She's no looker but somehow she snagged him. |
Anonymous
+1 Agree you have to go for old men, and their baggage - ex wives and kids who hate you. The women I know who "married rich" actually married around age 30, quite the opposite of rich, and the couple made their money together. No smart guy is going to dump a good wife for a gold digger. |
Anonymous
Oh, but they do all the time. The real question shouldn't be how to snag a rich husband, but, do you really want to put up with "ex wives and kids who hate you?" From what I've seen, that's the reality. My friend is going through this with a guy she met 5 years after he had been divorced. His ex wife and people in her circle still throw shade at my friend like she's a gold digger, even though she has her own family money and a big job. It's a perception she can't overcome and she's getting fed up with all of the drama from the older kids, ex wife and other older women in her now husband's circle. |
Anonymous
They’re probably going to do much better with no pre-nup. Pre-nups are 95% about protecting the assets of the moneyed spouse, not the reverse. |
Anonymous
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Anonymous
There is a lot between high income wealth and poor. Come on now, these are extremes. I think obviously, money is better for issues and problems that will arise in the marriage (and they will!) that can be fixed with money. For other issues, ie he becomes a cheater, he's prone to depression, he becomes addicted, he gets sick and copes poorly, he's a bore or self absorbed or a workaholic or a big insensitive clod as a father or worse, cruel. Those are problems that money does not simply fix. It doesn't make a man a family man, it doesn't make him empathic after you miscarry on the bathroom floor, it doesn't make him devoted, it doesn't make him take care care of you if you get very sick or present if you have tragedy. Just do a hard assessment of what money can and cannot do. Everything we have we built together as a partnership. Our foundation was Love, as corny as that sounds. And through nearly 30 years and our fair share of joy and tragedy too it was the Love that carried us through. I tell my daughter the same. I feel bad for you that you don't get this. |
Anonymous
| This thread is just sad. |
Anonymous
My friend met an independently wealthy guy who's crazy about her when she was about 33. Married a couple of years later. Still together fifteen years later. It's not perfect though. He doesn't have a regular job (never needed one) and seems to feel a bit lost, always starting businesses that never go anywhere. She has a regular job that she loves. I think he feels kind of bored. Almost all of my friends married in their mid-thirties and their husbands do very well. Maybe not rich, but perfectly comfortable. |
Anonymous
I’m a SAHM. My husband asks me if he needs/wants to purchase anything over $300. I do the same. It can be a sign of a healthy partnership if both parties have the same budget. |
Anonymous
| I’m nice but not rich. Too bad for you that you’d never give me a chance. |
Anonymous
Why is that too bad for her? Why isn’t it sufficient for you to find someone looking for a “nice guy who isn’t rich”? |
Anonymous
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I met now-DH when I was 30 and he was 37. We met at an alumni event.
I am fairly certain he was attracted to me because I was young enough to have kids, thin/fit, and went to good/prestigious schools. I didn’t have a lot of money, my family doesn’t have money, and I do fine with my job/salary but I’m not in a career that is ever going to be paid huge amounts of money. I also think DH liked that I didn’t care that he had a lot of money - I actually am not focused on money, was surrounded by super wealthy people on college, so his money didn’t impress me. I insisted on paying for my share of things as we got more serious and started living together. That being said, DH’s net worth at the time was like $2M, so not like he could stop working or was independently wealthy. However, we are now happily married, and 15 years later and DH has continued to be successful in his career, so we live a really nice lifestyle. And he actually does have family money, but it’s in a trust for education for the kids. |
Anonymous
Because I'm a catch. |
Anonymous
Seriously. You don’t want anything to do with OP. |
Anonymous
Not for someone looking for financially successful partner you’re not. You’re only a catch for someone who wants you. |