I want my kids to date at least once while they’re still at home & in HS
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Anonymous
| So that they learn to handle a breakup in a supervised manner & get relationship experience. Am I the only person who feels this way? |
Anonymous
| Yes. That is very strange thinking, to be honest. |
Anonymous
Plenty of people on DCUM feel this way, but it really is your kid’s call. I’ve got a 16 year old boy who told me recently that a lot of the kids in his school are pairing off but he does not feel like he wants to do that. A girl invited him to homecoming and he went but he called and asked if we could come get him early. We met her before the dance and she seemed very nice but she was also extremely extraverted, loud, seeking a lot of attention and our kid is pretty quiet. I asked him if he had a good time and he said it was fine but she was “a lot.” Maybe he’ll date in high school, maybe he won’t; he’ll be fine either way. |
Anonymous
| dating and breaking up is part of high school. |
Anonymous
Not so much anymore, actually. |
Anonymous
| I’m the op of “don’t like boyfriend.” Be careful what you wish for! |
Anonymous
| I would like it but not because I expect to supervise their breakup and give them relationship advice, and it doesn't seem likely. |
Anonymous
|
I'm finding that there there are a few kids that feel that they want to date, and their lives revolve around that. But most are not dating for whatever reason.
I know several kids in their 20s who have never had a real, serious BF/GF. They seem FINE. |
Anonymous
| I mean it’s not weird to think that it would be ideal, but if you’re doing anything to influence or push your kids into it that’s very weird and unhealthy. |
Anonymous
| My kids in their twenties haven't even dated yet (one is 29). Yes, I wish they had relationship experience, and I wish it had happened in HS (or at all). Nobody seems to want to date. |
Anonymous
|
Not exactly under your control, is it?
I dated once while still living in my parent's home... and have yet to break up, more than 20 years later! Two kids, a house, etc... 
Sorry, no experience with break-ups. |
Anonymous
|
That's weird. You have no role in "supervising" the romantic life of your child, regardless of whether they're in high school or not.
And I would not PUSH my child to have a romantic relationship in high school if they didn't want to just so I could say I have oversight of their dating life. Get a grip. You sound insane. |
Anonymous
Ok. Not having dated by 29 is concerning....but even then, it's not like you can do anything about it. Your kids' love life is theirs to dictate. |
Anonymous
| I really wanted DC to wait until college. There seems to be so much drama in HS, I thought he and his dates would be more mature in college. But he is dating and had his first breakup in 11th grade. It was a huge distraction from school, and affected his self esteem/mental health (i.e ex blocked him on all social channels, bad-mouthed him to their peer group, just out of petty vindictiveness). I was right about HS drama, unfortunately. Junior year is so important academically, I wish he didn't have to go through this, but you're right, at least we were there to support him. But in college, with some maturity, it may not have been as traumatic. |
Anonymous
| Yes. I regret not having that experience myself. My ideal situation would be DC non-serious dating, but you can't control that. |