PLEASE HELP! Urgent Situation With My Mom In California.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I need urgent advice.

I (single mom of 2) live here in VA. My mom (65 yrs old single woman) lives in CA. She used to work at the airport but lost her job at the beginning of this month due to COVID-19. She immediately filed for unemployment but the unemployment system is overwhelmed and she has not heard anything back.

My uncle in a different state (mom's brother) suggested that she file for early retirement social security benefits, which she did. I believe the age is 66 to get full benefits but since she's 65 she can file now and take a reduced payment.

My mom has been corresponding with the social security retirement benefits fits people over the phone and they have indicated that her first payout will start in May.

In the meantime my mom has lost her apartment and she is currently homeless. She has been sleeping out of her pickup truck but it broke down yesterday. She rented a UHAUL and slept in the UHAUL while the truck was getting fixed at the shop. She picked the truck up from the shop today and drove it for a few hours before it stopped working again this evening.

She is currently sitting in a shopping center parking lot inside of her disabled vehicle. When I pressed her for details about her truck mom says it's a 2010 GM Canyon with 253K miles on it. WTF!!? When I asked about vehicle history mom said that the truck has started to break down alot over the past couple years and that she's put approximately $5K worth of repairs into it. When I strongly suggested to my mom that she purchase a more reliable used vehicle cle with less mileage she responded that a) she has no job and no place to live at the moment and b) in order to collect her full social security retirement benefits she cannot have more than $5k in assets(ie bank accounts, cars etc.)

My mom is literally homeless and living out of a broke down truck right now and I'm freaking out. I'm trying to see how I can help her but it's hard being all the way over here in VA with limited financial resources.

I drive an older model paid off car bc I didn't want a car payment but right now I'm thinking the best thing I can do for mom is to buy her a used vehicle and make the monthly payments for her so at least she has a reliable vehicle to sleep in. What I'm trying to figure out is if I buy the car online and have it delivered to her in California will she have trouble registering the car in CA and obtaining insurance since the title will be in the banks name until I can pay it off and then ultimately in my name since she can't own assets over $5K?

I literally can not sleep from the stress of this situation and to make matters worse my mom told me that she's been riding the LA public transit buses to pass time since she has no where else to go. I asked her to please stay away from the public buses as they could be breeding grounds for her to catch COVID-19. This whole situation is a mess and I'm trying to figure out the best thing to do to help my with limited financial resources s while being all the way over here in VA.

Can anyone offer advice or suggestions?

Get her a plane ticket !

If you read the thread, OP cannot provide her mom with a place to live beyond a couple of weeks. OP is a single mom of two, with limited finances, renting a single room in someone's house.

[Anonymous]

You may want to research religious organizations near her. There may be some churches or synagogues etc that are able to assist her with immediate shelter and basic needs.

Good Luck to you and to your mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry for your mom‘s distress. There is no asset testing on social security income - it’s based on your age and history of earnings/work. There is no discussion of what you own or finances you have. What kind of vehicle she has does not affect SS qualification or income, just depends on what she’s paid into SS from her prior employment over the years. Has she applied for some other sort of compensation instead of SS that does means testing? Taking SS before her full age will cost her money over the rest of her life, may not be best short term decision if she’s close to full benefits age. Could you fly her out to stay with you for awhile until things can get sorted out? Sounds like there is more to this story, for her to be homeless with nobody around to help her there. Perhaps there are homeless shelters that can help her get back on her feet and offer housing and food?

When she lost her job she applied for everything...unemployment, food stamps, govt financial assistance, social security retirement. She said that she hasn't heard back from anyone except the social security folks. At first I thought she might have been confusing the asset testing with another one of these programs but it doesn't seem likely since she hasn't heard from back from anyone else.

She can stay with me for up to two consecutive weeks each year. To get her here with me permanently would require me to break the lease where I'm at and look for a place that's suitable for us all which will take time and effort. I'm barely staying afloat as is trying to keep up with working from home during COVID-19 with no childcare plus homeschooling and feeding my children daily. It's a lot to have to do all this while trying to help mom. I'm prepared to do the best I can but I cannot jeopardize my own living/financial situation at this point.

She was originally living in CA with her husband and stayed once their marriage broke down. We have no other family in CA.

The homeless shelters near her are all at capacity even more so due to all of the financial hardships in the midst of COVID-19.

I'm also looking into senior community type places in VA to see if I can get her into a reduced rent 1 BR or studio for seniors that are 55+.

Have you ever considered this could be the solution you’re looking for?

Even if her SSI is only $500/mo that will cover a larger place for your family and her.

You might not even have to break your lease if you move within the building. Plus she could provide childcare which you just said you need.

Unless she was a drug addict or something, why are you so resistant to her moving in?

I'm renting space from a private owner. We would need to find a new place alltogether.

Mom and I haven't lived together since I was 14. She tries to visit each year since my children (6 & 8) were born and we end up arguing after a day or two each time. The last fight was so bad that she didn't come to visit last year so I haven't seen her in two years and am trying (against my better judgement) to repair our relationship. There's lots of history which I cannot go into here that happened during childhood that has caused us to be distant.

You just got to suck it up under the circumstances, I know a family 6 living in one room apartment with bad-tempered and partially senile semi=abusive father but fam trying to make it work until this situation is over. Are they supposed to have that many folks in their apartment, hell no but they make it work. When things get bad my friend goes sits in the car by herself in the parking lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I need urgent advice.

I (single mom of 2) live here in VA. My mom (65 yrs old single woman) lives in CA. She used to work at the airport but lost her job at the beginning of this month due to COVID-19. She immediately filed for unemployment but the unemployment system is overwhelmed and she has not heard anything back.

My uncle in a different state (mom's brother) suggested that she file for early retirement social security benefits, which she did. I believe the age is 66 to get full benefits but since she's 65 she can file now and take a reduced payment.

My mom has been corresponding with the social security retirement benefits fits people over the phone and they have indicated that her first payout will start in May.

In the meantime my mom has lost her apartment and she is currently homeless. She has been sleeping out of her pickup truck but it broke down yesterday. She rented a UHAUL and slept in the UHAUL while the truck was getting fixed at the shop. She picked the truck up from the shop today and drove it for a few hours before it stopped working again this evening.

She is currently sitting in a shopping center parking lot inside of her disabled vehicle. When I pressed her for details about her truck mom says it's a 2010 GM Canyon with 253K miles on it. WTF!!? When I asked about vehicle history mom said that the truck has started to break down alot over the past couple years and that she's put approximately $5K worth of repairs into it. When I strongly suggested to my mom that she purchase a more reliable used vehicle cle with less mileage she responded that a) she has no job and no place to live at the moment and b) in order to collect her full social security retirement benefits she cannot have more than $5k in assets(ie bank accounts, cars etc.)

My mom is literally homeless and living out of a broke down truck right now and I'm freaking out. I'm trying to see how I can help her but it's hard being all the way over here in VA with limited financial resources.

I drive an older model paid off car bc I didn't want a car payment but right now I'm thinking the best thing I can do for mom is to buy her a used vehicle and make the monthly payments for her so at least she has a reliable vehicle to sleep in. What I'm trying to figure out is if I buy the car online and have it delivered to her in California will she have trouble registering the car in CA and obtaining insurance since the title will be in the banks name until I can pay it off and then ultimately in my name since she can't own assets over $5K?

I literally can not sleep from the stress of this situation and to make matters worse my mom told me that she's been riding the LA public transit buses to pass time since she has no where else to go. I asked her to please stay away from the public buses as they could be breeding grounds for her to catch COVID-19. This whole situation is a mess and I'm trying to figure out the best thing to do to help my with limited financial resources s while being all the way over here in VA.

Can anyone offer advice or suggestions?

Get her a plane ticket !

If you read the thread, OP cannot provide her mom with a place to live beyond a couple of weeks. OP is a single mom of two, with limited finances, renting a single room in someone's house.

Regardless easier to deal with homeless situation in local area than long distance in CA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re both single moms and you both have limited incomes. Buy her a ticket tonight to come to VA and use her SSI benefits to upgrade to a smaller rental for you, her and your kids.

+1. This is what I would do. I live in LA and rent is prohibitively expensive. She will be better off pooling her resources with yours in VA.

+1 Combine your incomes to make a larger pool. She doesn’t need a car if she isn’t working.

[Anonymous]

I’m the LA poster. What area is your mom in? There are some FEMA trailers set up in parks to help shelter the homeless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can she rent a room in a private home somewhere in the DC area? This would probably be her cheapest option.

How is renting a room in one of the most expensive housing parts of the country the cheapest option?

There are plenty of small towns/cities closer to her mother that have cheaper housing. Heck, you can buy a trailer home in Buffalo for $10k:
https://www.redfin.com/NY/Buffalo/3473-S-Park-Ave-14219/unit-B8/home/88843578

[Anonymous]

To all clueless pps here who can't understand how people are poor! This is how! Generational poverty is a thing. Don't be so smug, you a**holes.
OP is trying to move away from her mom's bad influence and mistakes and in the end, her mom will bring her down. Being born to her mom and dad has already set her life trajectory for the most part. But, then they come to bite you again, and again, and again.

[Anonymous]

Call Social Services in California. Female un-homed people get priority in temporary housing as well as families that are un-homed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She will need an address to collect any sort of unemployment benefit or food stamps, etc.

False. homeless people get food stamps all the time. Both it and unemployment benefits (and Social Security and SSI for that matter) get put on reloadable cards.

[Anonymous]

Considering current circumstances is there any chance private owner would consider extending the two weeks? Are they actually around at this point checking up on stuff? Just wondering as many people right now are more willing to give folks a break on certain things. Might be worth checking so you are not unnecessarily limiting yourself.

[Anonymous]

Tell her to go to social services and ask for help. Send her a bus, train, bus ticket and have her stay with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Considering current circumstances is there any chance private owner would consider extending the two weeks? Are they actually around at this point checking up on stuff? Just wondering as many people right now are more willing to give folks a break on certain things. Might be worth checking so you are not unnecessarily limiting yourself.

She is already out of her place and on the street.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To all clueless pps here who can't understand how people are poor! This is how! Generational poverty is a thing. Don't be so smug, you a**holes.
OP is trying to move away from her mom's bad influence and mistakes and in the end, her mom will bring her down. Being born to her mom and dad has already set her life trajectory for the most part. But, then they come to bite you again, and again, and again.

It is appalling that for all the supposed brains and money here people are so ignorant of the real world for many in this country. I guess when you can buy you kid’s way into good schools, you have to separate yourself from reality. They don’t want to be around the unwashed masses, but seem to have a lot of advice about how to deal with them on an affordable individual level.

So much bad advice here (like, mom to VA to live with you, and presto, the problem is solved). IDIOCY.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all clueless pps here who can't understand how people are poor! This is how! Generational poverty is a thing. Don't be so smug, you a**holes.
OP is trying to move away from her mom's bad influence and mistakes and in the end, her mom will bring her down. Being born to her mom and dad has already set her life trajectory for the most part. But, then they come to bite you again, and again, and again.

It is appalling that for all the supposed brains and money here people are so ignorant of the real world for many in this country. I guess when you can buy you kid’s way into good schools, you have to separate yourself from reality. They don’t want to be around the unwashed masses, but seem to have a lot of advice about how to deal with them on an individual level.

So much bad advice here (like, mom to VA to live with you, and presto, the problem is solved). IDIOCY.

God, I hate the new auto correct adding words!!