ILs sleeping in master while staying to watch kids?

[Anonymous]

I used to invite my MIL to use our master bedroom until the time she decided to go through my closet, including a storage box in the waaaay back where I keep special mementos from my dead mother, take them out, and then remove post-it notes from a book in said box--handwritten notes from my dead mother to me about the book--and throw them away.

So yeah, no. No one goes into the master bedroom anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t imagine having someone I trust enough to leave my kids with but don’t trust with my bedroom.

+1.

NP. I am team no way jose. It isn't that I wouldn't trust my ILs in there. I have a great relationship with my ILs. But a bedroom is a very private and personal space. Particularly when you're married. I don't want the responsibility of going through my room for all personal belongings I might find embarrassing and hiding them, this is my space and I treasure it. It took me a long time to even HAVE a master bedroom with an attached bath and the privacy that has accompanied that is extremely valuable to me. I would just not want someone in that space.

Of course if there was an emergency or something I would be able to get over it but if there is a perfectly acceptable alternative option than I would rather pay for other childcare than have someone in my space. It is different from a hotel room because my most intimate and personal life isn't strewn around a hotel room and neither is anyone else's. I just would feel uncomfortable.

I would HAPPILY buy a mattress topper or a new tv for the guest room before letting someone stay in the master.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d turn down the sitting on these terms. There’s a guest room. For guests. Which the grandparents are. In our house, grandparents would have to come in at least a day in advance of any trip we took and stay a day on the other end, so they don’t be in the guest room anyway for those nights. HAving them in the master in between would just mean multiple sets of sheets to wash and I’d have to strip and make our bed both right before we left and right when we got back in the door? No thanks. Doesn’t matter if it’s my parents or his making this request.

DP Well, if I were the grandparents I would stay home if not allowed to use the better bedroom. Take your kids on vacation or stay at home!

You are definitely not worth the free childcare! I can tell from two sentences!

[Anonymous]

WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DEMAND TO SLEEP IN THE BED YOUR ADULT CHILD AND HER SPOUSE SLEEP IN WHEN THERE IS A FINE, EMPTY GUEST ROOM DOWN THE HALL?

How did this even become an option? I'd rather buy a new mattress for guest bed or whatever the "issue" is. stop this now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I used to invite my MIL to use our master bedroom until the time she decided to go through my closet, including a storage box in the waaaay back where I keep special mementos from my dead mother, take them out, and then remove post-it notes from a book in said box--handwritten notes from my dead mother to me about the book--and throw them away.

So yeah, no. No one goes into the master bedroom anymore.

Well presumably you wouldn't trust your MIL to watch your children either, so not so relevant to OP's issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DEMAND TO SLEEP IN THE BED YOUR ADULT CHILD AND HER SPOUSE SLEEP IN WHEN THERE IS A FINE, EMPTY GUEST ROOM DOWN THE HALL?

How did this even become an option? I'd rather buy a new mattress for guest bed or whatever the "issue" is. stop this now.

BECAUSE AS THE OP MENTIONED THE MASTER BEDROOM HAS AN ATTACHED BATH, A BIG TV AND IS QUIETER AND MORE COMFORTABLE. (Did the all CAPS help me get my point across?)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DEMAND TO SLEEP IN THE BED YOUR ADULT CHILD AND HER SPOUSE SLEEP IN WHEN THERE IS A FINE, EMPTY GUEST ROOM DOWN THE HALL?

How did this even become an option? I'd rather buy a new mattress for guest bed or whatever the "issue" is. stop this now.

I don't get it either. I often watch my parent's dog for them when they're on vacation. I don't ask to sleep in their bed while they're gone. And the thought of sleeping in my parent's marital bed gives me the creeps. Blech.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d turn down the sitting on these terms. There’s a guest room. For guests. Which the grandparents are. In our house, grandparents would have to come in at least a day in advance of any trip we took and stay a day on the other end, so they don’t be in the guest room anyway for those nights. HAving them in the master in between would just mean multiple sets of sheets to wash and I’d have to strip and make our bed both right before we left and right when we got back in the door? No thanks. Doesn’t matter if it’s my parents or his making this request.

DP Well, if I were the grandparents I would stay home if not allowed to use the better bedroom. Take your kids on vacation or stay at home!

You're beyond obnoxious. I'll bet that you'll be kicked out of your grandkids' lives before too long, if not already. And then you'll whinge about being excluded.

Stop acting like a 3 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DEMAND TO SLEEP IN THE BED YOUR ADULT CHILD AND HER SPOUSE SLEEP IN WHEN THERE IS A FINE, EMPTY GUEST ROOM DOWN THE HALL?

How did this even become an option? I'd rather buy a new mattress for guest bed or whatever the "issue" is. stop this now.

BECAUSE AS THE OP MENTIONED THE MASTER BEDROOM HAS AN ATTACHED BATH, A BIG TV AND IS QUIETER AND MORE COMFORTABLE. (Did the all CAPS help me get my point across?)

THE GUEST ROOM ALSO HAS AN ATTACHED BATH. And who is seriously trashy enough to demand to sleep in someone else's marital bed (!) just because they can't survive a night on a comfortable queen bed without being able to watch TV in bed? AND THEY ARE THERE TO WATCH THE KIDS, so yeah they should be closer to the kids.

[Anonymous]

Have the grandparents actually said why they prefer the master bedroom to the guest room? Perhaps you can ask and then try and fix the issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DEMAND TO SLEEP IN THE BED YOUR ADULT CHILD AND HER SPOUSE SLEEP IN WHEN THERE IS A FINE, EMPTY GUEST ROOM DOWN THE HALL?

How did this even become an option? I'd rather buy a new mattress for guest bed or whatever the "issue" is. stop this now.

BECAUSE AS THE OP MENTIONED THE MASTER BEDROOM HAS AN ATTACHED BATH, A BIG TV AND IS QUIETER AND MORE COMFORTABLE. (Did the all CAPS help me get my point across?)

THE GUEST ROOM ALSO HAS AN ATTACHED BATH. And who is seriously trashy enough to demand to sleep in someone else's marital bed (!) just because they can't survive a night on a comfortable queen bed without being able to watch TV in bed? AND THEY ARE THERE TO WATCH THE KIDS, so yeah they should be closer to the kids.

'
OP and spouse are in the master bedroom daily so presumably if it's good enough for the OP to keep an eye on her kids on a daily basis, it's good enough for Grandma and Grandpa for a week. OP said that the master's attached bath is "better" than the guest room bath whatever that means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DEMAND TO SLEEP IN THE BED YOUR ADULT CHILD AND HER SPOUSE SLEEP IN WHEN THERE IS A FINE, EMPTY GUEST ROOM DOWN THE HALL?

How did this even become an option? I'd rather buy a new mattress for guest bed or whatever the "issue" is. stop this now.

BECAUSE AS THE OP MENTIONED THE MASTER BEDROOM HAS AN ATTACHED BATH, A BIG TV AND IS QUIETER AND MORE COMFORTABLE. (Did the all CAPS help me get my point across?)

THE GUEST ROOM ALSO HAS AN ATTACHED BATH. And who is seriously trashy enough to demand to sleep in someone else's marital bed (!) just because they can't survive a night on a comfortable queen bed without being able to watch TV in bed? AND THEY ARE THERE TO WATCH THE KIDS, so yeah they should be closer to the kids.

'
OP and spouse are in the master bedroom daily so presumably if it's good enough for the OP to keep an eye on her kids on a daily basis, it's good enough for Grandma and Grandpa for a week. OP said that the master's attached bath is "better" than the guest room bath whatever that means.

To me this comes down to how you treat family. They are caring for your two children while you go on vacation, and you want them to be happy during the visit. For whatever reason, they don't find the guest room comfortable and have proposed an alternative solution. I would accommodate them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If my in-laws ever slept in my bed I’d get rid of it. Yuck.

How do you feel about sleeping in hotel beds?

Now THAT"S something I try not to think about when we stay in a hotel. But we always pull back the coverlet and blanket...

[Anonymous]

Wow, of course they should sleep in the master. They are literally coming in to take over for the two of you while you are away and you want to shunt them off to the inferior space? That's appalling! Yes, they sleep in the Master Bedroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, of course they should sleep in the master. They are literally coming in to take over for the two of you while you are away and you want to shunt them off to the inferior space? That's appalling! Yes, they sleep in the Master Bedroom.

+1 There are some people on this thread with no manners.