Mothers of boys only (aka daughterless moms)- what's it like?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious if anyone anymore is ever disappointed they are having a girl, because they so wanted a boy. I literally never hear this, only mourning over having a boy. It's really interesting to me.

There are tons of people on this thread that seem to hate girls. Not sure what you're reading.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I'm with you. My mother is also deceased and although we are waiting to be surprised at the birth I am also worried that I will be devastated if it's a boy. Posting not with any solutions, but to tell you that you're not alone in these feelings.

My cousin was in the same boat and had a boy and she tells me that once the baby is born all those worried go out the window. Here's hoping she is correct!

Another motherless daughter here. We have one boy and I am pregnant with our second. I am waiting to find out the sex this time b/c I would really love a girl and don't want to feel disappointed throughout the pregnancy if I find out it's another boy. Once the baby is born, I anticipate feeling such overwhelming joy that it won't matter anymore (which is what happened the first time around with DS).

[Anonymous]

I haven't read the whole thread but I am a mother of two sons (young - 5 and 2) who lost my mother before my older son was born. We were extremely close.

I thought I wanted a daughter - wow, I couldn't have bene more wrong or happier with my boys. So much good advice in this thread - little boys are the BEST - so loving, and fun, and low drama. Even in preschool the girls are torturing each other.

I'm also very close with my MIL. Teach your boys the value of choosing a woman you'll be close with (if those are qualities you value). I'm not exactly like my MIL, but we are both very devoted to our family and respect each other as individuals (she never meddles; is there when we need her; our boys adore her; she treats me like a daughter; etc). My FIL was one of 3 boys and when his mother was sick, they all stepped up and handled everything.

Boys are amazing. Seriously. Consider yourself lucky!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I'm with you. My mother is also deceased and although we are waiting to be surprised at the birth I am also worried that I will be devastated if it's a boy. Posting not with any solutions, but to tell you that you're not alone in these feelings.

My cousin was in the same boat and had a boy and she tells me that once the baby is born all those worried go out the window. Here's hoping she is correct!

Another motherless daughter here. We have one boy and I am pregnant with our second. I am waiting to find out the sex this time b/c I would really love a girl and don't want to feel disappointed throughout the pregnancy if I find out it's another boy. Once the baby is born, I anticipate feeling such overwhelming joy that it won't matter anymore (which is what happened the first time around with DS).

Same sex siblings are way better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a total girly girl and was always a mama's girl growing up and I definitely did have a preference for a girl when I got pregnant the first time. We waited til the baby was born to find out the sex and when he was born, I was just so excited and happy to meet him and so in love with him that I couldn't have cared less whether it was a boy or girl in that moment and that has not changed one bit since he was born. He has been so much fun. I could never love another person more and I have just enjoyed every minute of being a 'boy mom'

And now I am pregnant with a second baby and I am actually finding myself hoping the 2nd one is a boy too because I have so loved having a son and think it would be so fun to raise 2 brothers. Of course I'd still be thrilled if it's a girl and I'll be very happy either way as long as the baby is healthy but I have just thought it was interesting how my perspective shifted and I have realized how wonderful it really is and what a privilege it is to get to parent my son.

Good luck to you!

I felt the same way. Was more disappointed finding out the first was a boy than that the second (and last) was - because by then I'd fallen so in love with my boy that I wanted another.

Boys/brothers are the best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious if anyone anymore is ever disappointed they are having a girl, because they so wanted a boy. I literally never hear this, only mourning over having a boy. It's really interesting to me. [/quote

Talk to people from Asia...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious if anyone anymore is ever disappointed they are having a girl, because they so wanted a boy. I literally never hear this, only mourning over having a boy. It's really interesting to me. [/quote

Talk to people from Asia...

Or to a man. Men don't talk about this issue as much, at least not on online message boards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a total girly girl and was always a mama's girl growing up and I definitely did have a preference for a girl when I got pregnant the first time. We waited til the baby was born to find out the sex and when he was born, I was just so excited and happy to meet him and so in love with him that I couldn't have cared less whether it was a boy or girl in that moment and that has not changed one bit since he was born. He has been so much fun. I could never love another person more and I have just enjoyed every minute of being a 'boy mom'

And now I am pregnant with a second baby and I am actually finding myself hoping the 2nd one is a boy too because I have so loved having a son and think it would be so fun to raise 2 brothers. Of course I'd still be thrilled if it's a girl and I'll be very happy either way as long as the baby is healthy but I have just thought it was interesting how my perspective shifted and I have realized how wonderful it really is and what a privilege it is to get to parent my son.

Good luck to you!

I felt the same way. Was more disappointed finding out the first was a boy than that the second (and last) was - because by then I'd fallen so in love with my boy that I wanted another.

Boys/brothers are the best.

+1,000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious if anyone anymore is ever disappointed they are having a girl, because they so wanted a boy. I literally never hear this, only mourning over having a boy. It's really interesting to me.

Talk to people from Asia...

Or to a man. Men don't talk about this issue as much, at least not on online message boards.

Correct. It's an upper class female thing (ie, DCUM demographic) to want girls.

[Anonymous]

I guess I can understand this because I would have been sad if I'd had only girls. But I think the initial disappointment wears off eventually and then you're happy with what you have because biology is powerful. Plus, you can't return them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read the whole thread but I am a mother of two sons (young - 5 and 2) who lost my mother before my older son was born. We were extremely close.

I thought I wanted a daughter - wow, I couldn't have bene more wrong or happier with my boys. So much good advice in this thread - little boys are the BEST - so loving, and fun, and low drama. Even in preschool the girls are torturing each other.

I'm also very close with my MIL. Teach your boys the value of choosing a woman you'll be close with (if those are qualities you value). I'm not exactly like my MIL, but we are both very devoted to our family and respect each other as individuals (she never meddles; is there when we need her; our boys adore her; she treats me like a daughter; etc). My FIL was one of 3 boys and when his mother was sick, they all stepped up and handled everything.

Boys are amazing. Seriously. Consider yourself lucky!

I agree.

I was initially sad when I found I was having a boy -- but having a boy has turned out to be so much fun! And boys LOVE their mothers. And he's very low drama.

[Anonymous]

Its actually interesting. I remember a study found that during gender selection for ivf treatments Americans prefer girls while non americans prefer boys. So since DCUM is an upper middle class American kind of group this overwhelming preference for girls is congruent with the study.

Though...the surplus of girls will probably mean deficit of men for them to pair up with, the reverse of what's going on in China right now. Yes yes, your daughters can be strong and independent and whatever and have alternative lifestyles, I get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its actually interesting. I remember a study found that during gender selection for ivf treatments Americans prefer girls while non americans prefer boys. So since DCUM is an upper middle class American kind of group this overwhelming preference for girls is congruent with the study.

Though...the surplus of girls will probably mean deficit of men for them to pair up with, the reverse of what's going on in China right now. Yes yes, your daughters can be strong and independent and whatever and have alternative lifestyles, I get it.

Percentage wise, there aren't enough people doing IVF - with gender selection - and choosing boys - for this to be an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its actually interesting. I remember a study found that during gender selection for ivf treatments Americans prefer girls while non americans prefer boys. So since DCUM is an upper middle class American kind of group this overwhelming preference for girls is congruent with the study.

Though...the surplus of girls will probably mean deficit of men for them to pair up with, the reverse of what's going on in China right now. Yes yes, your daughters can be strong and independent and whatever and have alternative lifestyles, I get it.

No one is actually sex selecting like they do in China. Give me a break- there will be no deficit of men.

[Anonymous]

I dont know, I never had a close relationship with my mother or sister, and I always wanted a son. Now I have a son and no disappointment here.