How bad will it be for dc to be one of the have-nots at private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was one of those kids (poorer in a wealthy school) and now my kids (K and 2nd) are as well at their "big 3" school. I wouldn't say that my kids notice or care that they don't have as large of a house or as much stuff. But our lives are very different than those around us and it makes it difficult to become good friends simply because we run in different social circles. My kids classmates go skiing most weekends. We can't afford that (several hundred $$ per trip). Their friends all belong to one of several country clubs and a large part of their social time is spent there, especially in summer. We don't belong to a club.

No one is mean about any of this--they are perfectly nice but our lives are very different and kids will generally gravitate towards being good friends with those that they see more.

This.

Agree with this, however there are still opportunities for friendships among the kids to develop. If anything, I found the divide to be greater among the parents (as others have said). For example. our DD was invited to all the birthday parties, bar/bat mitzvahs, and sweet sixteen parties of her wealthy private school friends, however DH and I weren't part of the inner circle of parents invited to social events at the club, the museum charity benefit, the ski trips, etc. Wasn't a huge problem, although I sometimes wish I'd made more good friends among the parents of my kids' school friends.