My husband died from alcoholism

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am so sorry, OP. Thank you for sharing your story. It is helpful to me, and reminds me I have so much to lose.

I am a recovering alcoholic, and as a woman was drinking 2-3 bottles of wine a day for years. I could easily be your husband and it reminds me to continue to prioritize my sobriety. Any amount of drinking is not safe for me, because it’s never just one. One turns into two turns into five and more, despite my intentions.

I am sorry your DH did not get out of alcohol’s clutches, and I will not drink with you today. Hugs and do seek out support groups. Your kids might also need them…there are some for ACOAs (adult children of alcoholics) even if they are grown.

What attracted you to alcohol initially and what did you like about it?

No judgment at all, only curiosity. My birth father is/was an alcoholic and has lost relationships and a career behind it. Would love to ask him, but the subject is too sensitive for him and would just bring more shame, which is not my intention.

[Anonymous]

I am so so sorry OP. My thoughts with you and your children

My friend's son died of alcoholism at 36. It was shocking.

One thing that is worrying doctors is how many young people are developing cirrhosis--some after just a few years of hard drinking . No one clear answer yet as to why, but the old model of alcoholics only dying from the disease after 30 years of a bottle of vodka a day is a myth. Lots of young people getting cirrhosis and dying as well. The below article mentions a bottle of wine a day or binge drinkers even if its 1x/week.

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2021/03/16/973684753/sharp-off-the-charts-rise-in-alcoholic-liver-disease-among-young-women

[Anonymous]

This was my dad. Same age. I was 14, and my 16 yr old brother found him on the kitchen floor. My parents had divorced when I was 3, so it was less of a loss for me since I didn’t see him often, but my brothers lived with him. Unlike you, we all knew he drank a fifth of whisky every night and it was when, not if.

I’m so sorry for your loss and especially for your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op: nobody has mentioned widowhood without alcoholism. I was widowed and I think, regardless of the alcohol alcoholism quotient you need to think about that part. If you go to counseling right now you’re dealing with the immediate after effects of this situation. Please don’t be surprised if you need to revisit going to therapy after a break that’s a year from now or 18 months or two years. I want to also thank you for starting this thread. I’ve been trying to quit since 2019 and I can’t do it.

You absolutely can quit, PP. You are not the exception to recovery. ODAAT

+100

You can do it pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am so so sorry OP. My thoughts with you and your children

My friend's son died of alcoholism at 36. It was shocking.

One thing that is worrying doctors is how many young people are developing cirrhosis--some after just a few years of hard drinking . No one clear answer yet as to why, but the old model of alcoholics only dying from the disease after 30 years of a bottle of vodka a day is a myth. Lots of young people getting cirrhosis and dying as well. The below article mentions a bottle of wine a day or binge drinkers even if its 1x/week.

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2021/03/16/973684753/sharp-off-the-charts-rise-in-alcoholic-liver-disease-among-young-women

People are dying of non alcoholic related cirrhosis more now. It's been on the uptick for young people. One of my cousins just died of it.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry, OP.

This is uncanny timing. My brother has been an alcoholic for 25 years (probably self medicating a mental illness). He's 47. Just this week, he started an intense decline, and is bedridden with many symptoms of late-stage cirrhosis, like swollen legs and distended abdomen, and he is refusing food, water, and medical treatment. It's horrifying. It feels like a long, slow motion suicide.

I saw your post earlier, before this happened, and thought about him. And now, it happens. It did feel inevitable.