Held back but gifted, is this frowned upon?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

It 100% can be taught and modeled. I sent two boys on time with summer birthdays (our cut off is Aug 31) but I was really intentional about social things and they both have a lot of friends and are well liked and have had zero behavioral problems. What you are describing with your daughter is not normal and it sounds very much like you're falling back on the "she's gifted" excuse instead of actually working with her on things that will impact her life more than whizzing through standardized tests. Most of the kids I know who redshirted would have been fine going on time or holding back with maturity, tbh. It comes down to a personal preference if you want your kid to be older or younger. What you are describing is not normal.

Ha. I love it when parents give themselves credit for things that they have absolutely no control over. You didn't teach your kids socially gifted any more than than other parents taught their kids to have ADHD or autism. Kids come a certain way.

[Anonymous]

Gifted kids aren’t typically redshirted. Two populations with virtually no overlap. Who denies that giftedness is real and distinct from maturity?

If social skills cannot be helped at home, then why socialize anyone at any time at all? Good lord.

[Anonymous]

NP. How many fake anti-redshirt threads are you going to start, OP?

I see this one is progressing as usual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Nope. Just a practitioner and mom of neurodivergent kids who sees flags so red they might as well be on fire. I hope this PP uses this as an opportunity. Her kid might benefit a lot from an eval.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Not the pp but you have to be living under a rock to not know that children being medicated is underutilized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Not the pp but you have to be living under a rock to not know that children being medicated is underutilized.

*overprescribed .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Your unwarranted personal attack is noted. Since you are incapable of rational discussion, I’ll leave a link to a meta article discussing the issue from NPR.

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/11/28/671614909/youngest-children-in-a-class-are-most-likely-to-get-adhd-diagnosis

I could provide links to the many worldwide studies that replicate the phenomenon as well (I have read them all), but I am not sure you have the numerical analysis background to get through the dense statistical analysis involved, so I would just start with an article from NPR.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Not the pp but you have to be living under a rock to not know that children being medicated is underutilized.

Ok but what does that have to do with what we're talking about? Or do you think that an eval means meds? That's not what an evaluation is for. All you are doing is showing you have no idea what you're talking about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Your unwarranted personal attack is noted. Since you are incapable of rational discussion, I’ll leave a link to a meta article discussing the issue from NPR.

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/11/28/671614909/youngest-children-in-a-class-are-most-likely-to-get-adhd-diagnosis

I could provide links to the many worldwide studies that replicate the phenomenon as well (I have read them all), but I am not sure you have the numerical analysis background to get through the dense statistical analysis involved, so I would just start with an article from NPR.

Again, you are the only person talking about medication! That's not what evaluations are for! I'm glad you are on a crusade against medicating children, that's literally not the discussion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Not the pp but you have to be living under a rock to not know that children being medicated is underutilized.

Ok but what does that have to do with what we're talking about? Or do you think that an eval means meds? That's not what an evaluation is for. All you are doing is showing you have no idea what you're talking about.

I think it is quite obviously you who is out of her depth, as shown by your immediate and vicious personal attack a few posts back.

You don’t seem to understand the pipeline issues involved, or the massively higher likelihood of medicalized treatment for ADHD for kids who are young for grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only held back when my child was socially immature and in concert with her preK teachers. She’s done very well since then. I’d never hold back a gifted child as I’d be focused on making sure he or she could thrive.

Lol! My child’s PreK teacher suggested repeating. Same ridiculous abstract reason-“socially immature.” I refused and knew this was just a thoughtless and lazy “reason” that is thrown around for convenience.
Years later, his gpa very high is and he thriving and is in a leadership role.
The PreK teacher was profoundly wrong and so is yours.

I have a gifted kid who was very young for her grade (1 day before the cutoff) and socially immature but went on time. Kindergarten was a disaster. She hated all of the desk work, would get wiggly and disruptive and be sent to the principal's office daily. She came to distrust teachers and considered herself a bad kid because she was always in trouble. She hated school and cried herself to sleep every night and then sobbed all the next morning about having to go to school where the teachers hated her. She had trouble resolving problems with friends and spent a lot of time upset. It was really, really terrible. It's so hard seeing your sweet kid crumble and seem themselves a bad person and morn their loss of time to "just play." We were very lucky that she had an excellent 1st grade teacher who started to heal the trauma from the prior year. She was still wiggly and immature but the teacher gave her classroom jobs to keep her busy and put her on group projects only with kids she knew would be a good fit. Then covid hit and she was home for 1.5 years. By the time she was back a lot of the wiggly immaturity was gone, but then we got hit with mean girl dynamics and social engineering and bullying. She's still immature and struggles socially. All of her friends are well into puberty and she hasn't started at all yet. Academically she has 100% scores in every middle school class (or higher if there's extra credit), takes all honors and accelerated classes, but really should be a grade back socially. And no, she doesn't have ADHD or anything diagnosable. It's maturity.

Your preK teacher may have been wrong, but social maturity is a real thing and it can be awful if a kid really isn't ready for kindergarten but is forced.

This sounds more like behavioral issues and sounds like you didn’t model social skills for her if she struggled this much. A lot of times the parents of kids who are testing high ignore teaching and modeling the skills that will actually bring success and happiness as an adult. Work on EQ. It’s going to make no difference if she’s 99 percent in anything if she can’t make and keep relationships and cooperate with others.

Oh boy. I promise you that EQ has been a focus her whole life. It's like me asking why your 50th percentile math student isn't getting 99th percentile scores?!? Don't you practice math with them? Kids have different strengths and weaknesses. Developmentally they arrive at different skills at different times. She's a kid who was walking at 8.5 months, climping the big slide at the playground and going down independently at 10 months and going on 2+ mile bike rides at 3 yo. She was reading chapter books at 4 yo. But the social stuff is a bit behind. It always has been. She eventually gets there, but when she gets to it. Kids come as they come and you can't force them to be who you want them to be.

She went to a very well respected preschool for the two years before kindergarten. That's how kids typically learn classroom skills. She had some skills, but was not ready for the pace of kindergarten day. She really just needed more free playtime, more playground time, and less desk time--just like the schedule she had in pre-K, which shouldn't be super surprising as she was still 4 yo for the beginning of kindergarten.

She's not very far outside of norms, but she is the very youngest in her grade. So when she's around all older kids she seems especially young. She would be totally average behavior and maturity wise for the class below.

Social maturity is a real thing. That's all I'm saying.

I can just tell what kind of mom you are by what you posted. Not many people talk like that … walked at 8.5 months.. I can’t even remember when my kids first walked let alone the 2 week mark. You sound really competitive about this stuff. I bet she struggles socially because you do and you’re not modeling the right behavior that makes her a likable kid. It’s not normal to have that many behavioral issues. Both of my children and myself were youngest in the grade and had zero issues. You bring up the percentiles for math. I’ll give an example. My son was in 30 percentile all through K and I started working with him 10 min a day with an online program and he’s in the 95 now in 1st based on testing first semester. So yes I absolutely believe you can supplement especially early elementary and that’s often what you see with testing, kids who receive supplemental help from a parent or had a really strong teacher.

Yeah, I think you're missing the impact of asymmetrical development. It stands out when kids do things very out of order--that's why I remember. Beginning as a baby she had some big gaps (language and frustration tolerance) and things that were off the charts ahead all at the same time. Those gaps eventually narrowed, but she came a certain way.

She had no actual behavioral issues by the second half of kindergarten and hasn't gotten in trouble since. But she also found holding it together in kindergarten to be extremely emotionally exhausting, and really struggled with expectations. It also doesn't mean that she doesn't struggle socially now and is often frustrated and sad, especially when kids gang up or she doesn't get the joke. She gets along best with kids a year younger and all her friends are on the youngest side in her class.

I mean, if age and maturity don't matter, why don't all the Sept and October birthday parents just push their kids ahead? Surely they'll be just fine if they just practice EQ and study more, right? They don't because maturity matters. And it's not something you can just teach or force any more so than you could have taught or forced your 9 mo to walk.

Look I'm not going to diagnose a stranger online, but I really hope you have gotten a neuropsych evaluation by now.

-pediatric mental health professional

Troll.

Np. Why would that be a troll?

I have a neurodivergent, young for their grade, gifted child too. The pp with a child who has social problems seems to be writing off big red flags, and it’s not clear that she’s actually had a neuropsych done before coming to the conclusion that it’s simply “immaturity.” Having an evaluation done can help give her a better framework for understanding and helping her child.

If you trust the evaluator. I’m not sure I would. The push to meds for young-for-grade kids is real and well-documented.

You're the only person on this thread who's mentioned meds. Maybe you should take yours?

Your unwarranted personal attack is noted. Since you are incapable of rational discussion, I’ll leave a link to a meta article discussing the issue from NPR.

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/11/28/671614909/youngest-children-in-a-class-are-most-likely-to-get-adhd-diagnosis

I could provide links to the many worldwide studies that replicate the phenomenon as well (I have read them all), but I am not sure you have the numerical analysis background to get through the dense statistical analysis involved, so I would just start with an article from NPR.

Again, you are the only person talking about medication! That's not what evaluations are for! I'm glad you are on a crusade against medicating children, that's literally not the discussion.

You are out of your depth here, I think.