Evite invitation - hide guest list?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ugh no, it's so annoying. If you hide it and I ask another mom if her kid is going and she says no, that's awkward.

That could happen even if the guest list is not hidden.
Maybe not you asking But Someone who’s not invited could ask you
What are you doing this weekend? So how is hiding a guest list anyone else business but the hosts .

I mean, I honestly don’t even know how to respond to you people. If someone I know isn’t invited asks me what we’re doing that weekend then I can be vague about the details of the party, but that’s not my default response to be evasive and weird. Maybe it’s because I have actual friendships with people where I don’t feel the need to censor myself unless I know I have to? It’s a freaking kid’s birthday party, not something sensitive like knowledge that a friend had a miscarriage and keeping that to myself because it’s not my business to tell. Some of you take your kid’s parties was too seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the better question here is -- who on earth are you people that are still using EVITE ??????

I don't even know the last time we received an evite - my kids have either come with a paper invitation, or the parent has emailed or texted me a Canva/graphic invitation. Either way, RSVPs have all been "RSVP Sarah at xxx-xxx-xxxx". That's pretty standard nowadays - I have 6 and 9 year olds.

(Raises hand) - ME! Why? Because it's free. I'm too cheap to pay for Paperless Post or whatever all nonsense you're talking about. Evite it is.

And to answer the original question, I don't hide the guest list because I tend to do smaller parties and I want everyone to see who else was invited so they don't talk to someone else about it and hurt their feelings. My kids prefer having 5 of their friends vs 105.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its super weird that people think a host should make a party guest list public to help the invitees to said party plan their lives(i.e. their ability to carpool or determine who is/isn’t in attendance). This is absolutely ridiculous. If you have concerns, you can RSVP as Maybe and discuss with the Host your concerns about needing to find a ride for DC. A responsible host will suggest potential carpool option you can reach out to, or depending on location offer to be your DC’s ride.


I

^^ np, I agree

As the birthday child’s parent, I want to maximize the number of invitees that can attend. If carpooling means my child’s besties’ parents are able to RSVP yes, then I want to make that happen for them. Why wouldn’t I?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does it matter if someone chooses to hide their list?
When people send paper invites or individual text invites
You don’t know who else is invited.

Also as kids get older they start inviting select friends and not the whole class, or budget reasons and some families might not be able to Invite the whole class. Either way why would you bring up a party to someone if you don’t know who else is invited ? I never bring it up and if someone asks for weekend plans I just say “oh we have a birthday Saturday and not too much going on Sunday “ why do you have to give specifics.

I’m honestly wondering if some of you people have friends in real life that you actually talk to… Maybe COVID really did a number on your social skills. I wouldn’t mention a kid’s party specifically in order to put some sort of state secret. I would mention the kid if my friend’s kid is also friends with them for many of the reasons noted here. If you don’t want people talking about your super special secret party, then let them know who else is invited! It’s really that simple.

Sorry not sorry that I have better things to talk to my friends about than my children's social lives?

I just get the feeling that you don’t talk to your friends much. We interact a lot in my neighborhood - going for a walk together after the kids get on the bus, taking a lunch break from work and eating together (this isn’t some sort of formal sit down, we have literally all just brought sandwiches from home but eaten them together at the park we can walk to), playing poker on a weeknight, book club, hanging out at the pool on the weekend. I don’t know, I see and talk to my friends a lot (and we all work and all have husbands who work). The first topic of conversation isn’t our kids’ social lives (which, by the way, isn’t the reason a party comes up), it’s because we’re discussing our weekend plans, which is a totally normal thing to do!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the better question here is -- who on earth are you people that are still using EVITE ??????

I don't even know the last time we received an evite - my kids have either come with a paper invitation, or the parent has emailed or texted me a Canva/graphic invitation. Either way, RSVPs have all been "RSVP Sarah at xxx-xxx-xxxx". That's pretty standard nowadays - I have 6 and 9 year olds.

(Raises hand) - ME! Why? Because it's free. I'm too cheap to pay for Paperless Post or whatever all nonsense you're talking about. Evite it is.

And to answer the original question, I don't hide the guest list because I tend to do smaller parties and I want everyone to see who else was invited so they don't talk to someone else about it and hurt their feelings. My kids prefer having 5 of their friends vs 105.

Paperless Post/Canva/PicMonkey - all of those are free for the basic functions you need to create a quick invitation. I, personally, really dislike Evite because of how much they spam me about stuff. I know a lot of other people do, too. Can you people please get with the times and just email or text an invitation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does it matter if someone chooses to hide their list?
When people send paper invites or individual text invites
You don’t know who else is invited.

Also as kids get older they start inviting select friends and not the whole class, or budget reasons and some families might not be able to Invite the whole class. Either way why would you bring up a party to someone if you don’t know who else is invited ? I never bring it up and if someone asks for weekend plans I just say “oh we have a birthday Saturday and not too much going on Sunday “ why do you have to give specifics.

I’m honestly wondering if some of you people have friends in real life that you actually talk to… Maybe COVID really did a number on your social skills. I wouldn’t mention a kid’s party specifically in order to put some sort of state secret. I would mention the kid if my friend’s kid is also friends with them for many of the reasons noted here. If you don’t want people talking about your super special secret party, then let them know who else is invited! It’s really that simple.

Sorry not sorry that I have better things to talk to my friends about than my children's social lives?

I just get the feeling that you don’t talk to your friends much. We interact a lot in my neighborhood - going for a walk together after the kids get on the bus, taking a lunch break from work and eating together (this isn’t some sort of formal sit down, we have literally all just brought sandwiches from home but eaten them together at the park we can walk to), playing poker on a weeknight, book club, hanging out at the pool on the weekend. I don’t know, I see and talk to my friends a lot (and we all work and all have husbands who work). The first topic of conversation isn’t our kids’ social lives (which, by the way, isn’t the reason a party comes up), it’s because we’re discussing our weekend plans, which is a totally normal thing to do!

I think the difference is who you are friends with vs other people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does it matter if someone chooses to hide their list?
When people send paper invites or individual text invites
You don’t know who else is invited.

Also as kids get older they start inviting select friends and not the whole class, or budget reasons and some families might not be able to Invite the whole class. Either way why would you bring up a party to someone if you don’t know who else is invited ? I never bring it up and if someone asks for weekend plans I just say “oh we have a birthday Saturday and not too much going on Sunday “ why do you have to give specifics.

I’m honestly wondering if some of you people have friends in real life that you actually talk to… Maybe COVID really did a number on your social skills. I wouldn’t mention a kid’s party specifically in order to put some sort of state secret. I would mention the kid if my friend’s kid is also friends with them for many of the reasons noted here. If you don’t want people talking about your super special secret party, then let them know who else is invited! It’s really that simple.

Sorry not sorry that I have better things to talk to my friends about than my children's social lives?

I just get the feeling that you don’t talk to your friends much. We interact a lot in my neighborhood - going for a walk together after the kids get on the bus, taking a lunch break from work and eating together (this isn’t some sort of formal sit down, we have literally all just brought sandwiches from home but eaten them together at the park we can walk to), playing poker on a weeknight, book club, hanging out at the pool on the weekend. I don’t know, I see and talk to my friends a lot (and we all work and all have husbands who work). The first topic of conversation isn’t our kids’ social lives (which, by the way, isn’t the reason a party comes up), it’s because we’re discussing our weekend plans, which is a totally normal thing to do!

I think the difference is who you are friends with vs other people.

Also, it sounds like you live in one of the neighborhoods described in the "cliquey neighborhood" thread. A lot of us don't live (or want to live) in neighborhoods like that. I like my neighbors, but they're not my only or best friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does it matter if someone chooses to hide their list?
When people send paper invites or individual text invites
You don’t know who else is invited.

Also as kids get older they start inviting select friends and not the whole class, or budget reasons and some families might not be able to Invite the whole class. Either way why would you bring up a party to someone if you don’t know who else is invited ? I never bring it up and if someone asks for weekend plans I just say “oh we have a birthday Saturday and not too much going on Sunday “ why do you have to give specifics.

I’m honestly wondering if some of you people have friends in real life that you actually talk to… Maybe COVID really did a number on your social skills. I wouldn’t mention a kid’s party specifically in order to put some sort of state secret. I would mention the kid if my friend’s kid is also friends with them for many of the reasons noted here. If you don’t want people talking about your super special secret party, then let them know who else is invited! It’s really that simple.

Sorry not sorry that I have better things to talk to my friends about than my children's social lives?

I just get the feeling that you don’t talk to your friends much. We interact a lot in my neighborhood - going for a walk together after the kids get on the bus, taking a lunch break from work and eating together (this isn’t some sort of formal sit down, we have literally all just brought sandwiches from home but eaten them together at the park we can walk to), playing poker on a weeknight, book club, hanging out at the pool on the weekend. I don’t know, I see and talk to my friends a lot (and we all work and all have husbands who work). The first topic of conversation isn’t our kids’ social lives (which, by the way, isn’t the reason a party comes up), it’s because we’re discussing our weekend plans, which is a totally normal thing to do!

Kids parties at this age are drop offs, so yes, you are discussing your children's social lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the better question here is -- who on earth are you people that are still using EVITE ??????

I don't even know the last time we received an evite - my kids have either come with a paper invitation, or the parent has emailed or texted me a Canva/graphic invitation. Either way, RSVPs have all been "RSVP Sarah at xxx-xxx-xxxx". That's pretty standard nowadays - I have 6 and 9 year olds.

(Raises hand) - ME! Why? Because it's free. I'm too cheap to pay for Paperless Post or whatever all nonsense you're talking about. Evite it is.

And to answer the original question, I don't hide the guest list because I tend to do smaller parties and I want everyone to see who else was invited so they don't talk to someone else about it and hurt their feelings. My kids prefer having 5 of their friends vs 105.

Paperless Post/Canva/PicMonkey - all of those are free for the basic functions you need to create a quick invitation. I, personally, really dislike Evite because of how much they spam me about stuff. I know a lot of other people do, too. Can you people please get with the times and just email or text an invitation?

DP than the one you're responding to, but we also use and receive mostly Evite.

The bolded is so unnecessarily mean. It's consistent with the overall tone of the guest list hiders, which is oddly suspicious, bordering on cynical. You do you, but your inability to move beyond your paranoia (about childrens! birthday! parties!) is striking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does it matter if someone chooses to hide their list?
When people send paper invites or individual text invites
You don’t know who else is invited.

Also as kids get older they start inviting select friends and not the whole class, or budget reasons and some families might not be able to Invite the whole class. Either way why would you bring up a party to someone if you don’t know who else is invited ? I never bring it up and if someone asks for weekend plans I just say “oh we have a birthday Saturday and not too much going on Sunday “ why do you have to give specifics.

I’m honestly wondering if some of you people have friends in real life that you actually talk to… Maybe COVID really did a number on your social skills. I wouldn’t mention a kid’s party specifically in order to put some sort of state secret. I would mention the kid if my friend’s kid is also friends with them for many of the reasons noted here. If you don’t want people talking about your super special secret party, then let them know who else is invited! It’s really that simple.

Sorry not sorry that I have better things to talk to my friends about than my children's social lives?

Aha, but you guest list hiders are forcing me to drive both ways to a bounce house 35 minutes from my house with no real time to return home versus carpooling. So that IS what I am doing with my weekend. Driving to pump it up and then looking for a place to get a coffee and kill time until I can pick my kid up again.

I just get the feeling that you don’t talk to your friends much. We interact a lot in my neighborhood - going for a walk together after the kids get on the bus, taking a lunch break from work and eating together (this isn’t some sort of formal sit down, we have literally all just brought sandwiches from home but eaten them together at the park we can walk to), playing poker on a weeknight, book club, hanging out at the pool on the weekend. I don’t know, I see and talk to my friends a lot (and we all work and all have husbands who work). The first topic of conversation isn’t our kids’ social lives (which, by the way, isn’t the reason a party comes up), it’s because we’re discussing our weekend plans, which is a totally normal thing to do!

Kids parties at this age are drop offs, so yes, you are discussing your children's social lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the better question here is -- who on earth are you people that are still using EVITE ??????

I don't even know the last time we received an evite - my kids have either come with a paper invitation, or the parent has emailed or texted me a Canva/graphic invitation. Either way, RSVPs have all been "RSVP Sarah at xxx-xxx-xxxx". That's pretty standard nowadays - I have 6 and 9 year olds.

(Raises hand) - ME! Why? Because it's free. I'm too cheap to pay for Paperless Post or whatever all nonsense you're talking about. Evite it is.

And to answer the original question, I don't hide the guest list because I tend to do smaller parties and I want everyone to see who else was invited so they don't talk to someone else about it and hurt their feelings. My kids prefer having 5 of their friends vs 105.

Paperless Post/Canva/PicMonkey - all of those are free for the basic functions you need to create a quick invitation. I, personally, really dislike Evite because of how much they spam me about stuff. I know a lot of other people do, too. Can you people please get with the times and just email or text an invitation?

DP than the one you're responding to, but we also use and receive mostly Evite.

The bolded is so unnecessarily mean. It's consistent with the overall tone of the guest list hiders, which is oddly suspicious, bordering on cynical. You do you, but your inability to move beyond your paranoia (about childrens! birthday! parties!) is striking.

I actually haven't responded one way or the other about guest lists, because I don't think I've received an evite in 3-4 years and I don't even remember the last time I sent one out, so I have no skin in that game. I am just astonished by the number of people out there who are still using evite, I thought it was over!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the better question here is -- who on earth are you people that are still using EVITE ??????

I don't even know the last time we received an evite - my kids have either come with a paper invitation, or the parent has emailed or texted me a Canva/graphic invitation. Either way, RSVPs have all been "RSVP Sarah at xxx-xxx-xxxx". That's pretty standard nowadays - I have 6 and 9 year olds.

(Raises hand) - ME! Why? Because it's free. I'm too cheap to pay for Paperless Post or whatever all nonsense you're talking about. Evite it is.

And to answer the original question, I don't hide the guest list because I tend to do smaller parties and I want everyone to see who else was invited so they don't talk to someone else about it and hurt their feelings. My kids prefer having 5 of their friends vs 105.

Paperless Post/Canva/PicMonkey - all of those are free for the basic functions you need to create a quick invitation. I, personally, really dislike Evite because of how much they spam me about stuff. I know a lot of other people do, too. Can you people please get with the times and just email or text an invitation?

The people in my circles could care less about what kind of invite people get. Who cares. The debate over evite being “in” or “out” is very bizarre and seems unnecessarily petty and silly.
DP than the one you're responding to, but we also use and receive mostly Evite.

The bolded is so unnecessarily mean. It's consistent with the overall tone of the guest list hiders, which is oddly suspicious, bordering on cynical. You do you, but your inability to move beyond your paranoia (about childrens! birthday! parties!) is striking.

I actually haven't responded one way or the other about guest lists, because I don't think I've received an evite in 3-4 years and I don't even remember the last time I sent one out, so I have no skin in that game. I am just astonished by the number of people out there who are still using evite, I thought it was over!

[Anonymous]

What about Paperless Post?

[Anonymous]

I am so scatterbrained and sometimes forget to invite a person. I have had to add a person or 2 more then a few times after I sent the invite. And I don’t want anyone feeling bad they are getting the invite sent late just b/c I forgot.

[Anonymous]

I still receive more invitations through Evite than I do through Paperless Post. I've considered sending my family's invitations through Paperless Post but it looks tedious to me. I don't have time for that cutesy "coin" business. If they would just tell me straight up what each invitation costs, I would consider it.

That aside, I prefer to receive invitations through Evite or PP because they both allow me to save all the details to our family's calendar. Random text message invitations mean I am less likely to get that on the calendar and attend.