People's perceptions of hosting au pairs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I think they are too cheap to hire a professional nanny. But I also see the benefit is some situations.

The professional nanny threads complaining about employers being 5-10 minutes late are all the proof I need that a professional nanny won’t work for us.

You realize that being late for daycare or after school care would be the same issue.

Which is why I have an au pair...

I agree, you have to pay nanny more if you expect that level of flexibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I think they are too cheap to hire a professional nanny. But I also see the benefit is some situations.

The professional nanny threads complaining about employers being 5-10 minutes late are all the proof I need that a professional nanny won’t work for us.

You realize that being late for daycare or after school care would be the same issue.

Which is why I have an au pair...

I agree, you have to pay nanny more if you expect that level of flexibility.

No matter how much you're willing to pay, I think you'd quickly burn out a real adult professional, who would never be able to make firm evening plans during weeknights. Seems like you'd mostly get the most desperate candidates who would move on quickly once they got a better opportunity.

[Anonymous]

It's funny....we had a professional nanny for 14 months before moving to hosting Au Pairs. This professional nanny was "stuck in traffic" and late about once per month but the ONE TIME we were home late because we were rear-ended, she was extremely annoyed and asked to be paid overtime for those ~30 minutes (we probably would have anyway but she showed zero concern for our well-being and was just mad we were late...) The last 7 years hosting Au Pairs we have only been late a small handful of times and every single Au Pair has been gracious and understanding about it.....

Clearly being late all the time is disrespectful and a sign of selfishness and poor planning but an occasional traffic emergency is understandable and I would think that "professionals" would understand that...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I think they are too cheap to hire a professional nanny. But I also see the benefit is some situations.

The professional nanny threads complaining about employers being 5-10 minutes late are all the proof I need that a professional nanny won’t work for us.

You realize that being late for daycare or after school care would be the same issue.

Which is why I have an au pair...

I agree, you have to pay nanny more if you expect that level of flexibility.

No matter how much you're willing to pay, I think you'd quickly burn out a real adult professional, who would never be able to make firm evening plans during weeknights. Seems like you'd mostly get the most desperate candidates who would move on quickly once they got a better opportunity.

Most surgeons have professional nannies that are flexible with their schedule. They are paid for that flexibility and bring a higher level of trust to the childcare equation. Many people in government have 24/7 nannies. Professional nannies know what they can and can’t handle, but you have to be direct about your needs and pay accordingly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's funny....we had a professional nanny for 14 months before moving to hosting Au Pairs. This professional nanny was "stuck in traffic" and late about once per month but the ONE TIME we were home late because we were rear-ended, she was extremely annoyed and asked to be paid overtime for those ~30 minutes (we probably would have anyway but she showed zero concern for our well-being and was just mad we were late...) The last 7 years hosting Au Pairs we have only been late a small handful of times and every single Au Pair has been gracious and understanding about it.....

Clearly being late all the time is disrespectful and a sign of selfishness and poor planning but an occasional traffic emergency is understandable and I would think that "professionals" would understand that...

Not all APs are created equal and not all nannies are created equal. Sometimes you get a dud but don’t judge everyone in that category (no matter the category $ off one experience; that’s illogical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I think they are too cheap to hire a professional nanny. But I also see the benefit is some situations.

The professional nanny threads complaining about employers being 5-10 minutes late are all the proof I need that a professional nanny won’t work for us.

You realize that being late for daycare or after school care would be the same issue.

Which is why I have an au pair...

I agree, you have to pay nanny more if you expect that level of flexibility.

No matter how much you're willing to pay, I think you'd quickly burn out a real adult professional, who would never be able to make firm evening plans during weeknights. Seems like you'd mostly get the most desperate candidates who would move on quickly once they got a better opportunity.

Most surgeons have professional nannies that are flexible with their schedule. They are paid for that flexibility and bring a higher level of trust to the childcare equation. Many people in government have 24/7 nannies. Professional nannies know what they can and can’t handle, but you have to be direct about your needs and pay accordingly.

I did try to hire a nanny before I turned to the AP program. I believe you that such nannies exist. I just never found them. But APs are relatively plentiful and have consistently much more flexibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do your friends perceive you (HFs) for having an AP? Do they think that you are living some luxurious lifestyle because you have live-in childcare? .

Hahahah no we think you're poor and/or cheap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do your friends perceive you (HFs) for having an AP? Do they think that you are living some luxurious lifestyle because you have live-in childcare? .

Hahahah no we think you're poor and/or cheap.

+1

[Anonymous]

Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

Why didn’t you hire a live in nanny?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

Why didn’t you hire a live in nanny?

Have you tried to hire a (legal) live in nanny? Or been one? This is not a popular gig.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

I sm a career nanny and don’t care how anyone chooses to raise their children, outside of neglect. People answering the question doesn’t mean we care what you personally do. Do what works for you, I support that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

I sm a career nanny and don’t care how anyone chooses to raise their children, outside of neglect. People answering the question doesn’t mean we care what you personally do. Do what works for you, I support that!

Don't you think that calling someone "cheap and/or poor" is a judgment call about what they personally are choosing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

I sm a career nanny and don’t care how anyone chooses to raise their children, outside of neglect. People answering the question doesn’t mean we care what you personally do. Do what works for you, I support that!

Don't you think that calling someone "cheap and/or poor" is a judgment call about what they personally are choosing?

Np...Are your feelings hurt or insulted? The question was about ppls perception.

AP are typically young women coming to America for a cultural experience in exchange for childcare duties for a low wage. They usually have little experience taking care of children. Sorry but that screams, cheaper childcare option. Then the excuses for not hiring nannies are well mine didn’t come in when it rained, mine was upset I was late, live in nannies are hard to find, etc. Look, if your comp package is trash then you will get trash nannies. Better to stick with what you can afford for your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do nannies care that some people prefer AP over nannies?
We had a nanny for 9 months and it rained or snowed we had no child care it seemed. We went to AP 6 years ago and would not go back to a nanny. We can afford it no problem. But we also have a 7br 6 bath home and housing an ap is not a big deal or any real impact for having guests or relatives visit.
Each to their own.

I sm a career nanny and don’t care how anyone chooses to raise their children, outside of neglect. People answering the question doesn’t mean we care what you personally do. Do what works for you, I support that!

Don't you think that calling someone "cheap and/or poor" is a judgment call about what they personally are choosing?

Np...Are your feelings hurt or insulted? The question was about ppls perception.

AP are typically young women coming to America for a cultural experience in exchange for childcare duties for a low wage. They usually have little experience taking care of children. Sorry but that screams, cheaper childcare option. Then the excuses for not hiring nannies are well mine didn’t come in when it rained, mine was upset I was late, live in nannies are hard to find, etc. Look, if your comp package is trash then you will get trash nannies. Better to stick with what you can afford for your family.

I posted about it being impossible to find a nanny who would work our split, unreliable schedule, and we never even got to salary negotiation stage. Real nannies don't want this crappy schedule. Thus, APs.