Dating men and having them open doors...or not.

post reply Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:00
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

To the OP's question, I don't care if I am dating the woman, or it is a family member, or a female friend, I open car doors for women. There have been times where the woman will reach over and try to open the driver's door as I walk over.


That was a good practice before keyless entry, but imo, physically opening the door for able-bodied adults is outdated.


Until 3 years ago, the car I had was not a keyless entry.
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:03
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Anonymous
It would be a deal - breaker for me. Not holding the door open, not pulling out my chair, not walking on the curbside tells me a man wasn't raised right.

Married 29 years to a southern gentleman.
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:07
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Anonymous
Building doors yes. Car doors, no.
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:08
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Anonymous
so if I don't want to raise my son to be a chauvinist, I do what exactly?
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:10
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:so if I don't want to raise my son to be a chauvinist, I do what exactly?


You'd teach him to disparage women.

Now, back to the topic at hand...
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:18
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:so if I don't want to raise my son to be a chauvinist, I do what exactly?


You'd don't teach him to disparage women.

Now, back to the topic at hand...
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:23
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:so if I don't want to raise my son to be a chauvinist, I do what exactly?


You'd don't teach him to disparage women.

Now, back to the topic at hand...


Try teaching him to string a sentence together first.
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:28
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:so if I don't want to raise my son to be a chauvinist, I do what exactly?


You'd don't teach him to disparage women.

Now, back to the topic at hand...


Try teaching him to string a sentence together first.


Touché
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:29
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Anonymous
I am male and I just hold building doors open for everyone. I thought this was just something that adults do.

If a passenger door for a car is locked, I'll unlock it. In the days of power locks, I'd honestly feel a bit silly walking around a car to open an unlocked door for a able-bodied adult. Maybe I would do this for my grandmother, who physically (and mentally) struggles with things that we take for granted.

As for pulling chairs out -- again, I'd feel silly doing this for an able-bodied grown-up. And you should feel silly for expecting it.

On the other hand, I'm egalitarian and agree with most feminist stances on political issues. Do you want to be treated like a helpless doll who constantly requires "special handling" or do you want to be treated as an equal?
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:32
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I am male and I just hold building doors open for everyone. I thought this was just something that adults do.

If a passenger door for a car is locked, I'll unlock it. In the days of power locks, I'd honestly feel a bit silly walking around a car to open an unlocked door for a able-bodied adult. Maybe I would do this for my grandmother, who physically (and mentally) struggles with things that we take for granted.

As for pulling chairs out -- again, I'd feel silly doing this for an able-bodied grown-up. And you should feel silly for expecting it.

On the other hand, I'm egalitarian and agree with most feminist stances on political issues. Do you want to be treated like a helpless doll who constantly requires "special handling" or do you want to be treated as an equal?


I want you to know the difference (effortlessly, because of a proper upbringing).
[Post New]05/28/2016 21:49
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I am male and I just hold building doors open for everyone. I thought this was just something that adults do.

If a passenger door for a car is locked, I'll unlock it. In the days of power locks, I'd honestly feel a bit silly walking around a car to open an unlocked door for a able-bodied adult. Maybe I would do this for my grandmother, who physically (and mentally) struggles with things that we take for granted.

As for pulling chairs out -- again, I'd feel silly doing this for an able-bodied grown-up. And you should feel silly for expecting it.

On the other hand, I'm egalitarian and agree with most feminist stances on political issues. Do you want to be treated like a helpless doll who constantly requires "special handling" or do you want to be treated as an equal?


I want you to know the difference (effortlessly, because of a proper upbringing).


"Know the difference," meaning spending my life toggling back and forth between "treat women as equal" and "treat woman as antebellum southern belles"? You do realize that this is where a lot of those "manners" come from? They descent from an age when upper class southern whites had plenty of spare time to engage in needless ceremony because they had other people doing their dirty work for them.

[Post New]05/28/2016 21:59
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TwistdMike
Member Offline
To the women out there who like the doors to be opened by their man, position yourself to the left side of your man.

If you're on the right, it makes the act difficult and awkward, you will be in the way.
[Post New]05/28/2016 22:02
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Building doors yes. Car doors, no.

Same here. I also noticed if he let me off of an elevator first or not. If he didn't it would stand out to me in a bad way.
[Post New]05/28/2016 22:09
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Anonymous
I went on a hiking date with a man when it was slippery and icy. Not once did he look back or give me a hand to make sure I was keeping up with him or if I needed help down a hill. I ghosted him after that for his lack of awareness.
[Post New]05/28/2016 22:21
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I went on a hiking date with a man when it was slippery and icy. Not once did he look back or give me a hand to make sure I was keeping up with him or if I needed help down a hill. I ghosted him after that for his lack of awareness.


UGH, he's a loser.

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