Two primary reasons

I couldn't handle 50% more sleep disruption

I felt like I didn't have enough attention to go around

DS went under for surgery and no issues.

Oh this phase was the worst. When I was able to, I just wore my baby for one longer nap and then let the other ones be shorter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What the heck? Why are you making them decide? Just decide without asking and tell them that’s what you’re doing or where you’re going.

This reminds me of how my sister used to ask her three or four year old, “what do you want to eat for dinner?” I remember my niece pointing to a bottle of syrup in the refrigerator. My sister looked at me with an exasperated expression like can you believe she wants her for dinner? I wanted to be like, don’t ask your three-year-old what she wants for dinner. Just give it to her.

OP here. That's not what I ask them. It's not that broad. Instead of “what do you want to eat for dinner?” I ask- Would you like broccoli or green beans?

Just serve dinner. It's still a question. Which means it's still something that allows them to pick the opposite and pout when they don't get what they want.

Yes.

How long ago did she potty train?

I tried the silent walk back and after a few nights was losing my sanity because it was taking HOURS and he thought it was the most fun game ever.

So, what I did was tell my son that it was time to sleep and he needed to stay in his room. I told him I could see he was having trouble staying in his room, so I was going to help him by closing the door.

He freaked out and wanted the door open and tried to open it. I held the door closed, and told him I would only open the door if he got back in bed. He immediately got back in bed. I opened the door. He got out of bed and I shut the door again and held it. He freaked out again, but he learned.

The entire process took like 5 minutes and some tears, and I only wish I'd done it sooner.

Anonymous wrote:I remember readying a really sweet story about a classroom with a kid with CF and pre-COVID, all the kids in his class wore masks during flu season. It helped protect the kid with CF and the others kids were less likely to get sick too. In a situation like this I would happily have my kid wear a mask. It would be a nice teachable moment about empathy.

That is really sweet. I feel like something like this would be tough to organize right now because of how political mask wearing is in certain places, plus the fatigue of everything after the past year.

OP, if you are really worried about your son, I would definitely consider a fully remote school option for him.

12 hours of sleep is enough at this age. He might still get tired and cranky during the day though since the sleep is all consolidated at night. I don't think this is the issue though.

Siblings picking on each other is like a biological imperative. I know it doesn't happen in every household, but it happens in most, at least during certain phases. You just have to stop your child from acting on those impulses to hit.

Also, I can't tell if this post is serious. There are 2 full time care givers, no screens, and the only treats are crackers?

Cortisol levels are highest in the morning, so that *could* be a factor as to why this is happening in the morning.

Have you tried going for a walk and seeing if that helps?

Alcohol and anxiety don't mix well so I'd try to limit yourself, especially at night when alcohol consumption can negatively affect sleep.

I am interested in a recurring theme in some of these comments that if you feel your kid's pain, you're narcissistic somehow, or making it all about you.

I feel like it's the opposite. It's people who are very sensitive to other people who feel this -- not people who think only about themselves.

OP I'm not sure what you're asking.

I assume that you know that when people label a girl as a "tomboy", they're saying that the girl is behaving more like a boy than a girl. Of course, the assumption is that girls only like to sit quietly and play with dolls, and that all boys are into sports and dirt or whatever.

If someone specifically says this to you about your daughter, feel free to just ask them what they mean. Might as well put them on the spot.

I think it's normal to suffer a bit when your child is suffering. My DS had an accident that required hospitalization + surgery about a year ago, and I was pretty affected by it. When he was crying and in pain I absolutely felt some of it.

When he skins his knee? No. A cavity? No.

Yes, this is normal, especially given the context you provide at the end. Baby coming soon + your bed rest = a lot for a 3 year old to process and be anxious about.

Keep doing this: "We try to validate his feelings, never punish but still show clear boundaries and try not give him into his demands."

Other than that, do your best to make sure he's getting enough sleep, exercise and healthy food.

Anonymous wrote:By being happy to see them after we've been separated. I literally say, "Hi! I'm so happy to see you!"

And by encouraging them to try things that are hard, and to perservere. Then I can remind them of when they worked hard at something difficult and eventually got it.

The best advice I received on this site was to act delighted to see your kids after separation. I have done it ever since and it's wonderful to see their faces light up when you tell them how happy you are that they're home.

I never really thought about it in terms of self-esteem but it's certainly been good for my relationship with them.