My husband is fat and he does not care

[Anonymous]

I’ve tried both being subtle and explicitly telling him he needs to lose weight. He needs to lose 30-40lbs. I have always been a healthy weight but the last few months, not wanting to be hypercritical, started regularly working out. Well now I’m in very good shape and...he’s still overweight with zero motivation to lose it. I thought maybe he would want to work out with me if he saw me working hard and we could make it a couples thing but no. Then he wonders why I’m never in the mood to have sex.

I love him and don’t ever see myself cheating or leaving him over this - I just had to vent my frustration somewhere. The double standard between men and women is not fair. I don’t think he’s depressed. Just hates exercise and loves ice cream. Oh well.

[Anonymous]

Have you told him you're not in the mood because of his weight?

[Anonymous]

You still love him, so there is that. You started out trying to be all tough but it turns out you are a little marshmallow.

[Anonymous]

Stop being so controlling. He doesn’t “need” to do what you want. It’s his body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You still love him, so there is that. You started out trying to be all tough but it turns out you are a little marshmallow.

(I think he is the marshmallow )

[Anonymous]

What height and weight is he? Approximately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve tried both being subtle and explicitly telling him he needs to lose weight. He needs to lose 30-40lbs. I have always been a healthy weight but the last few months, not wanting to be hypercritical, started regularly working out. Well now I’m in very good shape and...he’s still overweight with zero motivation to lose it. I thought maybe he would want to work out with me if he saw me working hard and we could make it a couples thing but no. Then he wonders why I’m never in the mood to have sex.

I love him and don’t ever see myself cheating or leaving him over this - I just had to vent my frustration somewhere. The double standard between men and women is not fair. I don’t think he’s depressed. Just hates exercise and loves ice cream. Oh well.

30/40 is a big number. It will takes its toll if nothing is done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What height and weight is he? Approximately.

6’ and 225lbs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve tried both being subtle and explicitly telling him he needs to lose weight. He needs to lose 30-40lbs. I have always been a healthy weight but the last few months, not wanting to be hypercritical, started regularly working out. Well now I’m in very good shape and...he’s still overweight with zero motivation to lose it. I thought maybe he would want to work out with me if he saw me working hard and we could make it a couples thing but no. Then he wonders why I’m never in the mood to have sex.

I love him and don’t ever see myself cheating or leaving him over this - I just had to vent my frustration somewhere. The double standard between men and women is not fair. I don’t think he’s depressed. Just hates exercise and loves ice cream. Oh well.

30/40 is a big number. It will takes its toll if nothing is done.

Yes and as he nears 50 I worry about his health.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you told him you're not in the mood because of his weight?

This. If he ask you, tell him the truth.

[Anonymous]

Gross.

[Anonymous]

Get that man a beer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get that man a beer

Are you fat too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What height and weight is he? Approximately.

6’ and 225lbs

That doesn’t sound all that overweight for 6 ft. My 6 ft DH went down to 180 after an illness and looked quite gaunt. He usually maintains around 200 lb and doesn’t look fat.

[Anonymous]

tell him you will have more sex with him if he loses weight. But only if you mean it.