My Wife Has Turned Mean

[Anonymous]

Your wife was probably always mean. The "loving and sweet" facade was dropped once she got the baby she wanted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are so ridiculous OP I feel bad for your wife. She’s growing a person and a placenta and is carrying around weight exhaustion and hormones and god knows what else.
I thought you would say something like nasty name calling or throwing things but …disappointed over a sauce and asking for quiet as she can’t sleep? You are the kid in this scenario. You have no awareness of what others are going through and are diminishing others’ feelings.

Oh a meeting didn’t go well at work? It’s fine who cares?! You can’t sleep because neighbors are stomping around? Oh suck it up.

My husband was supportive attentive and validating at every step of my pregnancy and I was better for it. You’re a lame mean complainer. Not your wife.

Throwing a tantrum over sauce is immature. OP’s wife doesn’t get a pass because she is pregnant. Being pregnant is not a disability or a reason to act like a child because she didn’t get what she wanted. It sounds like your husband validated you because you act like a brat when you don’t get your way and he doesn’t want to argue or deal with you.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are so ridiculous OP I feel bad for your wife. She’s growing a person and a placenta and is carrying around weight exhaustion and hormones and god knows what else.
I thought you would say something like nasty name calling or throwing things but …disappointed over a sauce and asking for quiet as she can’t sleep? You are the kid in this scenario. You have no awareness of what others are going through and are diminishing others’ feelings.

Oh a meeting didn’t go well at work? It’s fine who cares?! You can’t sleep because neighbors are stomping around? Oh suck it up.

My husband was supportive attentive and validating at every step of my pregnancy and I was better for it. You’re a lame mean complainer. Not your wife.

Throwing a tantrum over sauce is immature. OP’s wife doesn’t get a pass because she is pregnant. Being pregnant is not a disability or a reason to act like a child because she didn’t get what she wanted. It sounds like your husband validated you because you act like a brat when you don’t get your way and he doesn’t want to argue or deal with you.

OP did NOT say she threw a tantrum. Per OP, she "broke down" (meaning cried) because she didn't get the sauce. She only got mad because he told her it wasn't a big deal.

I'm guessing you're a man who has never been pregnant, but it's not unusual to cry over minor things when pregnant. It's not being immature, it's not throwing a tantrum, it's biological and can't be stopped. I cried multiple times a day when pregnant over the dumbest things. OP dismissing and invalidating her feelings gives her every right to be angry with him, that's not at all how you handle someone's sadness.

Literally all he had to do was say "I can't believe they messed up your order, I'm so sorry that happened. F***ers. Want me to go pick up the right sauce?" and honestly she probably wouldn't have even wanted him to go get it, she likely just wanted her feelings to be acknowledged and validated. Easy to do and OP would have walked on water.

++++++100000

crying does not equal a tantrum, crying is healthy

OP invalidated her feelings, this is what hurt her. Hopefully he learns this because he will need this skill when raising a child. As other's have pointed out, OP this would have been a perfect time to be the hero! validate her feelings, offer to get the sauce. You would have been king of the world in her eyes.

Crying over an injury or death or trauma is healthy. Crying over sauce (which wasn't even missing, just without extra) is a temper tantrum and adult woman, even those "growing a human," should not throw temper tantrums about stupid, miniscule things like bonus sauce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are so ridiculous OP I feel bad for your wife. She’s growing a person and a placenta and is carrying around weight exhaustion and hormones and god knows what else.
I thought you would say something like nasty name calling or throwing things but …disappointed over a sauce and asking for quiet as she can’t sleep? You are the kid in this scenario. You have no awareness of what others are going through and are diminishing others’ feelings.

Oh a meeting didn’t go well at work? It’s fine who cares?! You can’t sleep because neighbors are stomping around? Oh suck it up.

My husband was supportive attentive and validating at every step of my pregnancy and I was better for it. You’re a lame mean complainer. Not your wife.

Throwing a tantrum over sauce is immature. OP’s wife doesn’t get a pass because she is pregnant. Being pregnant is not a disability or a reason to act like a child because she didn’t get what she wanted. It sounds like your husband validated you because you act like a brat when you don’t get your way and he doesn’t want to argue or deal with you.

OP did NOT say she threw a tantrum. Per OP, she "broke down" (meaning cried) because she didn't get the sauce. She only got mad because he told her it wasn't a big deal.

I'm guessing you're a man who has never been pregnant, but it's not unusual to cry over minor things when pregnant. It's not being immature, it's not throwing a tantrum, it's biological and can't be stopped. I cried multiple times a day when pregnant over the dumbest things. OP dismissing and invalidating her feelings gives her every right to be angry with him, that's not at all how you handle someone's sadness.

Literally all he had to do was say "I can't believe they messed up your order, I'm so sorry that happened. F***ers. Want me to go pick up the right sauce?" and honestly she probably wouldn't have even wanted him to go get it, she likely just wanted her feelings to be acknowledged and validated. Easy to do and OP would have walked on water.

++++++100000

crying does not equal a tantrum, crying is healthy

OP invalidated her feelings, this is what hurt her. Hopefully he learns this because he will need this skill when raising a child. As other's have pointed out, OP this would have been a perfect time to be the hero! validate her feelings, offer to get the sauce. You would have been king of the world in her eyes.

Crying over an injury or death or trauma is healthy. Crying over sauce (which wasn't even missing, just without extra) is a temper tantrum and adult woman, even those "growing a human," should not throw temper tantrums about stupid, miniscule things like bonus sauce.

Every decent psychologist would disagree with you, but you do you. I feel bad for your family tho.

[Anonymous]

Decent psychologists advocate having tantrums over bonus sauce?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are so ridiculous OP I feel bad for your wife. She’s growing a person and a placenta and is carrying around weight exhaustion and hormones and god knows what else.
I thought you would say something like nasty name calling or throwing things but …disappointed over a sauce and asking for quiet as she can’t sleep? You are the kid in this scenario. You have no awareness of what others are going through and are diminishing others’ feelings.

Oh a meeting didn’t go well at work? It’s fine who cares?! You can’t sleep because neighbors are stomping around? Oh suck it up.

My husband was supportive attentive and validating at every step of my pregnancy and I was better for it. You’re a lame mean complainer. Not your wife.

Throwing a tantrum over sauce is immature. OP’s wife doesn’t get a pass because she is pregnant. Being pregnant is not a disability or a reason to act like a child because she didn’t get what she wanted. It sounds like your husband validated you because you act like a brat when you don’t get your way and he doesn’t want to argue or deal with you.

OP did NOT say she threw a tantrum. Per OP, she "broke down" (meaning cried) because she didn't get the sauce. She only got mad because he told her it wasn't a big deal.

I'm guessing you're a man who has never been pregnant, but it's not unusual to cry over minor things when pregnant. It's not being immature, it's not throwing a tantrum, it's biological and can't be stopped. I cried multiple times a day when pregnant over the dumbest things. OP dismissing and invalidating her feelings gives her every right to be angry with him, that's not at all how you handle someone's sadness.

Literally all he had to do was say "I can't believe they messed up your order, I'm so sorry that happened. F***ers. Want me to go pick up the right sauce?" and honestly she probably wouldn't have even wanted him to go get it, she likely just wanted her feelings to be acknowledged and validated. Easy to do and OP would have walked on water.

++++++100000

crying does not equal a tantrum, crying is healthy

OP invalidated her feelings, this is what hurt her. Hopefully he learns this because he will need this skill when raising a child. As other's have pointed out, OP this would have been a perfect time to be the hero! validate her feelings, offer to get the sauce. You would have been king of the world in her eyes.

Crying over an injury or death or trauma is healthy. Crying over sauce (which wasn't even missing, just without extra) is a temper tantrum and adult woman, even those "growing a human," should not throw temper tantrums about stupid, miniscule things like bonus sauce.

Every decent psychologist would disagree with you, but you do you. I feel bad for your family tho.

im the "++++" PP above, and agree, If you think crying = tantrum then i feel bad for you family.

I cry ALL THE TIME, both from happiness, and sadness. Crying is a release of emotions. it's heathier than bottling it up. If you are so scared of the show of emotions, then you should find someone to talk to about this.