Constantly rejected and I'm feeling embarrassed. I'm not sure what to do

[Anonymous]

Are you going on dates with guys you are attracted to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

Isn’t this kind of standard for online dating? You’re not going to have a connection or chemistry with most people. Just a few.

[Anonymous]

With all due respect, if you’re meeting men online that’s why. Of course you won’t have chemistry with people you pick out on the computer. Meet real men in real life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With all due respect, if you’re meeting men online that’s why. Of course you won’t have chemistry with people you pick out on the computer. Meet real men in real life.

As of 2019 40% of couples met online, the number is probably higher since the pandemic. Times have changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

Isn’t this kind of standard for online dating? You’re not going to have a connection or chemistry with most people. Just a few.

This is true. I can understand how frustrating it is OP. Dating sucks. I think you just have to date, but don't put so much pressure on yourself for it to turn into a relationship. Use online resources, go out with guys you know from various activities, have friends set you up. I think the more you do it the less pressure you will put on yourself and the more relaxed you will be.

[Anonymous]

OP why do you think your last relationship really ended?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, may I ask, what do you wear on these first dates?

Men are pretty simple creatures and usually aren't too discerning until maybe the third date so I'm wondering if your love of comfort over cute may be sending the wrong signal if you are mostly going on first dates. We can definitely help!

Nice shirt and jeans. I don't wear dresses, except for special occasions which are rarely ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you going on dates with guys you are attracted to?

I'm usually at minimum moderately attracted to my dates. I know I'm average at best in the looks department and I can't picky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, may I ask, what do you wear on these first dates?

Men are pretty simple creatures and usually aren't too discerning until maybe the third date so I'm wondering if your love of comfort over cute may be sending the wrong signal if you are mostly going on first dates. We can definitely help!

Nice shirt and jeans. I don't wear dresses, except for special occasions which are rarely ever.

This may be a problem.

You don't have to wear a dress, but you might come across as you aren't really into the date. too casual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP why do you think your last relationship really ended?

My ex moved out of state and we weren't going to do LD

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you going on dates with guys you are attracted to?

I'm usually at minimum moderately attracted to my dates. I know I'm average at best in the looks department and I can't picky.

You have got to work on your self-esteem.

Go on dates with guys you are attracted to not lukewarm about that's part f your problem right there, it's hard to act interested in someone you're meh about, and these guys can feel that and don't want to waste their time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you going on dates with guys you are attracted to?

I'm usually at minimum moderately attracted to my dates. I know I'm average at best in the looks department and I can't picky.

You have got to work on your self-esteem.

Go on dates with guys you are attracted to not lukewarm about that's part f your problem right there, it's hard to act interested in someone you're meh about, and these guys can feel that and don't want to waste their time.

Understandable, but I can't get the guys who I like interested in me, so I feel like I don't have a choice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you going on dates with guys you are attracted to?

I'm usually at minimum moderately attracted to my dates. I know I'm average at best in the looks department and I can't picky.

You have got to work on your self-esteem.

Go on dates with guys you are attracted to not lukewarm about that's part f your problem right there, it's hard to act interested in someone you're meh about, and these guys can feel that and don't want to waste their time.

Understandable, but I can't get the guys who I like interested in me, so I feel like I don't have a choice

This is why it's paramount you need to work on your self esteem and kind of just doing you knowing that you are awesome and not pressuring yourself so much. I feel like some of the guys you are interested in are probably interested in you, but you either don't think they would be so you don't seem them expressing your interest or you come on too strong or lead with your insecurity and it puts them off. People like confident people. I'm not saying you have to change your entire personality, but there really is a bit of truth to having to love yourself first. I say this as someone who battles self-esteem and shyness and I have noticed since working on building up myself, liking who I am. I attract more people to me in terms of just regular friendship, but also guys that I like showing interest in me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you going on dates with guys you are attracted to?

I'm usually at minimum moderately attracted to my dates. I know I'm average at best in the looks department and I can't picky.

You have got to work on your self-esteem.

Go on dates with guys you are attracted to not lukewarm about that's part f your problem right there, it's hard to act interested in someone you're meh about, and these guys can feel that and don't want to waste their time.

Understandable, but I can't get the guys who I like interested in me, so I feel like I don't have a choice

This is why it's paramount you need to work on your self esteem and kind of just doing you knowing that you are awesome and not pressuring yourself so much. I feel like some of the guys you are interested in are probably interested in you, but you either don't think they would be so you don't seem them expressing your interest or you come on too strong or lead with your insecurity and it puts them off. People like confident people. I'm not saying you have to change your entire personality, but there really is a bit of truth to having to love yourself first. I say this as someone who battles self-esteem and shyness and I have noticed since working on building up myself, liking who I am. I attract more people to me in terms of just regular friendship, but also guys that I like showing interest in me.

+1

Nobody else will fix you. You will still be yourself. If you are not really and truly okay with yourself as you are, you will bring that into the relationship, and it poisons it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP why do you think your last relationship really ended?

My ex moved out of state and we weren't going to do LD

Did he ask you to move with him? Or did he just say he wanted to end relationship? Was the relationship lukewarm? Did he tell you he loved you often? Was he loving spending time together?