Constantly rejected and I'm feeling embarrassed. I'm not sure what to do

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What races, OP?

I would put effort in hair, makeup, maybe lose the glasses for dates and lose a few pounds.

I’m 5’4” and gained weight during Covid. 135 was my absolute heaviest ever (besides when pregnant) and I felt fat. I’m back down to 125, trying to get to 120. I don’t see how 150 can be skinny with only 1 inch.

Multiracial can be exotic, sexy and beautiful. They can also sometimes look a bit awkward. With makeup and some hair effort, I’m sure you can be the sexy kind.

Please don't project your body image issues on other women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all due respect, if you’re meeting men online that’s why. Of course you won’t have chemistry with people you pick out on the computer. Meet real men in real life.

As of 2019 40% of couples met online, the number is probably higher since the pandemic. Times have changed.

That doesn’t mean it’s good for everyone. How can you tell if you have chemistry with someone if you’re shopping through an online profile. You can’t properly see or smell or hear them or see the way they move through the world and interact with others. It’s so bizarre.

That's why you meet them and move on. When you're 35 and want a relationship you need to explore all avenues. It's not online dating that's OP's problem or most people's problem, it's her low self-esteem. If you noticed OP says she has the same problem no matter how she meets the guys.

What a waste of time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The first impression is important. Do what you can to look and feel your best. Get a fresh haircut, mani/pedi, find makeup that works for you, appropriate jewelry and outfits. Wear clothes that are date appropriate and show that you are trying. You want to leave an impression on someone-“wow, she’s cute” or “wow, she’s stylish and down to earth

That's the thing, I feel so uncomfortable "dressing up". It feels unnatural to me. My version of this is likely an everyday look for the stereotypical woman.

My husband thinks I look pretty hot in athleisure. I wear a lot of comfy dresses that are flattering.

Before I got married, I wore t shirts and shorts a lot and had tons of guys. I had a pretty great figure then and also now.

My best friend is divorced and she wears t shirts, jeans and boots or t shirt and shorts on dates. She also has a lot of dresses. Dresses don’t have to be uncomfortable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What races, OP?

I would put effort in hair, makeup, maybe lose the glasses for dates and lose a few pounds.

I’m 5’4” and gained weight during Covid. 135 was my absolute heaviest ever (besides when pregnant) and I felt fat. I’m back down to 125, trying to get to 120. I don’t see how 150 can be skinny with only 1 inch.

Multiracial can be exotic, sexy and beautiful. They can also sometimes look a bit awkward. With makeup and some hair effort, I’m sure you can be the sexy kind.

Please don't project your body image issues on other women.

I have a nice figure. I get a lot of attention from men. I’m just saying 150 on a 5’5” frame is not skinny.

I think most guys are attracted to thin women. I had tons of guys who wanted to date me. I’m also smart, confident and give a great bj.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The first impression is important. Do what you can to look and feel your best. Get a fresh haircut, mani/pedi, find makeup that works for you, appropriate jewelry and outfits. Wear clothes that are date appropriate and show that you are trying. You want to leave an impression on someone-“wow, she’s cute” or “wow, she’s stylish and down to earth

That's the thing, I feel so uncomfortable "dressing up". It feels unnatural to me. My version of this is likely an everyday look for the stereotypical woman.

I'm not someone who is into the manis and pedis or make-up, you don't have to look nice or like you actually want to be on a date and didn't just basically roll out of the bed and would rather be elsewhere. Maybe I'm wrong but I'm imagining you look kind of sloppy on your dates like you don't want to be there. I honestly think this goes back to your low self-esteem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What races, OP?

I would put effort in hair, makeup, maybe lose the glasses for dates and lose a few pounds.

I’m 5’4” and gained weight during Covid. 135 was my absolute heaviest ever (besides when pregnant) and I felt fat. I’m back down to 125, trying to get to 120. I don’t see how 150 can be skinny with only 1 inch.

Multiracial can be exotic, sexy and beautiful. They can also sometimes look a bit awkward. With makeup and some hair effort, I’m sure you can be the sexy kind.

Please don't project your body image issues on other women.

I have a nice figure. I get a lot of attention from men. I’m just saying 150 on a 5’5” frame is not skinny.

I think most guys are attracted to thin women. I had tons of guys who wanted to date me. I’m also smart, confident and give a great bj.

Please go away!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So 150 lbs is size 6? That doesn’t seem quite right. Don’t try to sell yourself as something you are not. If you are listing yourself as size 6 and the date sees a 150 lb woman, they will wonder in what other areas you are being misleading...

I am 5’6 and at 153lbs I was size 4-6, now at 140 most size 2 clothes hang on me. It really all depends on the body composition and how the weight is distributed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So 150 lbs is size 6? That doesn’t seem quite right. Don’t try to sell yourself as something you are not. If you are listing yourself as size 6 and the date sees a 150 lb woman, they will wonder in what other areas you are being misleading...

I am 5’6 and at 153lbs I was size 4-6, now at 140 most size 2 clothes hang on me. It really all depends on the body composition and how the weight is distributed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Are you going on dates with guys “out of your league”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would loose 20lbs. You are a tad overweight and probably attract men that look down on you…and the weight probably affects your self esteem

Overweight? I wear a size small(I'm also multi-racial) and while I was previously more athletic(and stopped due to injury), I was so bony and skinny! I'm happy with my weight now.

Well, maybe you are happy with your weight but 150lbs with hight 5.5 is not "bony and skinny" by any standard. I am 5.9 at 141lbs, and my husband thinks I should loose a little bit to pre-birth 134lbs.

Men like woman in such a weight they can make love against the wall.

Not OP, but You and your husband have issues.

Agree, sounds like it’s time to take out the trash

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Are you going on dates with guys “out of your league”?

That is likely. I have a guy friend who I dated a few years back who people tend to find super attractive. I tend to find guys who are well dressed aesthetically appealing. I'm clearly aware that those guys aren't my type. The guys who like me tend to be STEM types, anime needs, to give you all an idea.

[Anonymous]

Anime nerds*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Are you going on dates with guys “out of your league”?

That is likely. I have a guy friend who I dated a few years back who people tend to find super attractive. I tend to find guys who are well dressed aesthetically appealing. I'm clearly aware that those guys aren't my type. The guys who like me tend to be STEM types, anime needs, to give you all an idea.

I think you need to figure yourself out. Before you try a relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and I've never had a serious relationship. I dated someone 2 years ago who broke up with me and said I was very nice and sweet and anyone would be lucky to have me. Prior to that I was cheated on and I had a fwb before meeting my unfaithful ex. I have dated online and met people in person and the same results. People seem to want to date me because I'm nice and feel like I shouldn't be alone, but that isn't enough to sustain a relationship. I'm quite embarrassed as I do desire marriage and long-term partnership, but I can barely get into a relationship and I just don't see it happening. I'm the only one out of my friends who is in this situation, so I don't have anyone to turn to.

What are your interests, OP? What is your personality like?

I'm a huge sports fan, basketball specifically. My dad was a high school coach and my sibling played at the college level, so it's a big part of my life. Dating a sports fan is a must for me. I also love cooking, one of my favorite things to do with a partner. I read periodically and I love going to comedy shows and theater shows(live music and plays). Traveling is also an interest of mine.
I'm very low key and it can sometimes take awhile for me to come out of my shell as I'm shy, especially when it comes to dating. I'm confident elsewhere. I'm excelling in my career, but those skills haven't translated to my dating life.

OK so you sound pretty great! You just need a basketball guy, or a basketball-adjacent guy. How would you rate yourself in terms of attractiveness?

I'm likely a 6-7, so about average. 5'5" and 150lbs, size 6. Think cute, nerdy, with glasses. I'm kind of a plain jane, but dress up when necessary. I choose comfort over being cute however.

Sorry, but that's not a 6-7.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Not sure how to post images, but I'd say that my everyday look would be at the most like this:
https://pin.it/3x2JCsS