Why do husbands never leave for the affair partner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had an AP for three years and we both like our spouses except the marriages are sexless. There is a lot about my wife that I prefer over my AP and my AP is not someone I’d want to marry. She’s fun, likes sex and there are NSA.

Those strings will hang you when one of your spouse’s finds out. And they will. You will regret every minute you spent with that AP. The light of day reveals how truly ugly she is...trust me. They will flip on u.

No. Worst case is the spouse finds out and they divorce. If not for his AP again his only option is divorce. In no scenario does he regret sex with AP.

When he loses his wife and kids and begs and cries and moans in agony all for a woman he never loved, wasn’t that attractive and used for sex...yeah he’s pretty upset he risked all of that for a skank. 9 times out of 10 they tell their therapist if they could go back in time they never would have done it. However, you can’t unf@ck that donkey, so the damage is done.

“I stayed because he’s amazing.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think its interesting no one discusses the impact on men when women cheat and leave the marriage or the AP.

It’s humiliating and emasculating for males. It’s not their fault they married whores, but society unfairly labels them.

Yes. It’s very hard for men. Society views the betrayed male spouse as less of a man. A betrayed female garners sympathy. There is also no support for betrayed husbands. Even on the Internet, all of the websites/blogs assume the victim is female and the cheater male.

Although people look down at married cheater mothers pretty harshly. It’s considered particularly whorish my society to cheat when you have kids at home.

Men divorce in higher numbers after discovering their wife had a sexual affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had an AP for three years and we both like our spouses except the marriages are sexless. There is a lot about my wife that I prefer over my AP and my AP is not someone I’d want to marry. She’s fun, likes sex and there are NSA.

Those strings will hang you when one of your spouse’s finds out. And they will. You will regret every minute you spent with that AP. The light of day reveals how truly ugly she is...trust me. They will flip on u.

No. Worst case is the spouse finds out and they divorce. If not for his AP again his only option is divorce. In no scenario does he regret sex with AP.

When he loses his wife and kids and begs and cries and moans in agony all for a woman he never loved, wasn’t that attractive and used for sex...yeah he’s pretty upset he risked all of that for a skank. 9 times out of 10 they tell their therapist if they could go back in time they never would have done it. However, you can’t unf@ck that donkey, so the damage is done.

“I stayed because he’s amazing.”

Poor donkey.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think its interesting no one discusses the impact on men when women cheat and leave the marriage or the AP.

It’s humiliating and emasculating for males. It’s not their fault they married whores, but society unfairly labels them.

Men suffer even great psychological damage, and so do their children when mom is the cheater.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Keep in mind that some men have affairs for variety or a kink they can't get at home.

If the relationship is otherwise good they may still want to grow old with their spouse and are just filling a void in the present.

I don't know the few women I know who had affairs that left their husband found that the affair partner ran for the hills straight away, all loving during the affair but not interested in anything real.

I’ve observed the same. I think most men have zero intention of divorcing. Women that cheat want a new husband.

[Anonymous]

My husband left me for his AP. And then she broke up with him.

[Anonymous]

They do. My exhusband married his affair partner as soon as our divorce was finalized. You want hard? Try having the woman who broke up your marriage raise your children half the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They do. My exhusband married his affair partner as soon as our divorce was finalized. You want hard? Try having the woman who broke up your marriage raise your children half the time.

I can’t even imagine. I’m sorry.

[Anonymous]

No. Worst case is the spouse finds out and they divorce. If not for his AP again his only option is divorce. In no scenario does he regret sex with AP.


I agree with this.

You live in a fairtytale. When a cheater’s spouse finds out, it unleashed trauma on the betrayed spouse. Even the most selfish cheater would have to be stone cold to not regret inflicting that on someone they had built a life with. And them when affairs blow up it’s not nearly as neat and tidy as getting a simple divorce. Kids usually find out about the affair and resent the cheating parent and end up with a skewed view of relationships. This does not all happen in a vacuum.

[Anonymous]

It’s rare if she’s married too. She’s usually looking for an exit affair and he is in it for a safe, no strings f@ck—somebody who wouldn’t tell his wife because she didn’t want her husband to find out either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

No. Worst case is the spouse finds out and they divorce. If not for his AP again his only option is divorce. In no scenario does he regret sex with AP.


I agree with this.

You live in a fairtytale. When a cheater’s spouse finds out, it unleashed trauma on the betrayed spouse. Even the most selfish cheater would have to be stone cold to not regret inflicting that on someone they had built a life with. And them when affairs blow up it’s not nearly as neat and tidy as getting a simple divorce. Kids usually find out about the affair and resent the cheating parent and end up with a skewed view of relationships. This does not all happen in a vacuum.

These people are still in delusional fantasyland. They think they will never get caught and they are delusion about the true fallout. It creates a shit storm that lasts pretty much forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had an AP for three years and we both like our spouses except the marriages are sexless. There is a lot about my wife that I prefer over my AP and my AP is not someone I’d want to marry. She’s fun, likes sex and there are NSA.

Those strings will hang you when one of your spouse’s finds out. And they will. You will regret every minute you spent with that AP. The light of day reveals how truly ugly she is...trust me. They will flip on u.

Pp, you are placing no blame on the husband. Why didn't you call him ugly? He wants sex, marriage is sexless. The affair let's his wife stay married. She should thank the AP.

Wow. Are you teaching your kids great values too. Would you be ok if your child's spouse cheated on them?

DP here. No child of mine is stupid enough to think you can not have sex, stay married, AND expect your partner not to find an AP.
You need to reconsider what it means to have "great values" if you believe otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Get off off DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had an AP for three years and we both like our spouses except the marriages are sexless. There is a lot about my wife that I prefer over my AP and my AP is not someone I’d want to marry. She’s fun, likes sex and there are NSA.

Those strings will hang you when one of your spouse’s finds out. And they will. You will regret every minute you spent with that AP. The light of day reveals how truly ugly she is...trust me. They will flip on u.

No. Worst case is the spouse finds out and they divorce. If not for his AP again his only option is divorce. In no scenario does he regret sex with AP.

When he loses his wife and kids and begs and cries and moans in agony all for a woman he never loved, wasn’t that attractive and used for sex...yeah he’s pretty upset he risked all of that for a skank. 9 times out of 10 they tell their therapist if they could go back in time they never would have done it. However, you can’t unf@ck that donkey, so the damage is done.

What in the world are you even talking about? It's just sex. Get over it. Nobody cares!
A divorced dad "loses his kids" exactly the same as his wife does: it is called 50/50. And there is no LOSS when a sexless wife finally decides she no longer wants to be your platonic room mate.

The thing you fail to understand is this: a sexless marriage is ALREADY over. Divorce is absolutely zero threat because there is nothing left to lose in the dead sexless marriage, only everything to gain by an affair to "save" the dead marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve had an AP for three years and we both like our spouses except the marriages are sexless. There is a lot about my wife that I prefer over my AP and my AP is not someone I’d want to marry. She’s fun, likes sex and there are NSA.

Those strings will hang you when one of your spouse’s finds out. And they will. You will regret every minute you spent with that AP. The light of day reveals how truly ugly she is...trust me. They will flip on u.

No. Worst case is the spouse finds out and they divorce. If not for his AP again his only option is divorce. In no scenario does he regret sex with AP.

When he loses his wife and kids and begs and cries and moans in agony all for a woman he never loved, wasn’t that attractive and used for sex...yeah he’s pretty upset he risked all of that for a skank. 9 times out of 10 they tell their therapist if they could go back in time they never would have done it. However, you can’t unf@ck that donkey, so the damage is done.

This is my bil still 20 years later. His wife divorced him and though he still has a relationship with his kids, it's not that great. They won't come to his home, nor is the AP allowed to theirs.

He lives with the AP, but never married her. If his wife would take him back he would dump her in a heart beat. For Xmas he goes to his sons home, and the ex is there too. His AP visits her family, it's totally crazy.

When one cheats and divorce happens everyone knows and it affects even the grand-kids. No one wants to visit various homes with APs versus one united family. My bil doesn't have much of a relationship with the grand kids as well which is pretty typical with cheaters. It's a domino effect, and the financial fall out often takes years to recover.