Resentful that ILs only want to help DH’s son and not mine

[Anonymous]

Did I miss it or did OP not answer questions about how old the kid was when she got married or what his relationship is with the step grandparents? My guess is those answers would she a lot of light here.

[Anonymous]

In our house there would be a shouting match over this

[Anonymous]

If I knew in advance that my kids were going to be treated this way by my new husband's family, I would NEVER remarry. What a joke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I knew in advance that my kids were going to be treated this way by my new husband's family, I would NEVER remarry. What a joke.

To be clear, this is not op. Just supportive of the fact that op thought she was building a real family.

[Anonymous]

Your husband should get a divorce from you as you have shown your true colors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your husband should get a divorce from you as you have shown your true colors.

Or she could get a divorce from him. She could live in a small apartment, work and help pay for her son's education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I knew in advance that my kids were going to be treated this way by my new husband's family, I would NEVER remarry. What a joke.

To be clear, this is not op. Just supportive of the fact that op thought she was building a real family.

m

Real family? What did you think your son was entitled to 6 grandparents then?? What’s wrong with your own parents? I plan on paying my own kids tuition

If your husband adopts your kid I would feel differently.

[Anonymous]

I mean my parents didn’t want to pay my husband, their son in law’s, student loans. Why would they want to pay for a step kid? That’s even less of a relation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I can understand why you'd be resentful that your son is being treated differently when you've put in so much effort to treat both boys fairly. But your ILs aren't under any obligation to treat your son the same way they treat their own grandson.

You need to figure out a way to minimize the effect this may have on your son and the boys' relationship with each other. You set the tone here. If you are bitter and resentful, your son is going to pick up on that. If you view this as a benefit to your family as a whole, your son will likely view it similarly.

+1!!!!!!
Plus like others said, you can use the extra $ saved towards your son's fund. Would the husband be on board with that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean my parents didn’t want to pay my husband, their son in law’s, student loans. Why would they want to pay for a step kid? That’s even less of a relation.

Seriously! A Son in law is at least the father of your grandkids. A step grandchild has less of a relation.

[Anonymous]

How many step kids even feel kindly towards step grandparents??

[Anonymous]

Has OP confirmed there are even funds saved for OP’s stepson? There are a lot of comments that the money saved for the husband’s son can now be directed to OP’s son. If it’s family tradition for the stepson to go to a certain school, it’s possible OP’s husband has always known that his parents’ will pay. There may not be money saved that can be redirected.

[Anonymous]

Just be grateful that you do not need to find your step sons college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In our house there would be a shouting match over this

You could shout until you were blue but I get to spend my money on whom I choose as do OP's in-laws. They owe zero to her son by another man.

[Anonymous]

wow this takes the cake.

I can't believe you feel entitled to your in laws money!!!!

What a see you next Tuesday.