Behavioral Issues at Private Schools

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let's be real; if you can afford private you go private.

You are funny.

The people who say this actually believe it which is the most amazing part.

We used to be one of these people. Our school was one well regarded ones. It costs 17k in Nursery, 38k in upper grades. That's a salary for some people. We assumed that meant it was better than public schools. Things that are expensive must be better than things that are free. We were wrong. My child came home telling me about a student slapping the teacher across the face When we were at school I could see that this child was out of control. Smaller school meant less resources to deal with that child. Then we went to a birthday party where most of the class was there and I could see that he was not the only one with issues. Just because class sizes are small doesn't mean your child is getting more attention. A class of 12 where one child is a terror and five have varying degrees of issues. We're in public now.

We paid $36k for K and a class of low 20s plus two teachers. One behavior issue kid sat in the teachers lap most of the day so that rendered her incapable— he was a legacy kid whose parent had attended the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree private schools are weak in teaching foundational phonics and math, but public is moving in that direction. Schools are getting political and introducing ethnic in the younger grades. Look at the Seattle public schools tying together social justice and math.

What is "introducing ethnic"?

I assume it’s ethics and what to think about society.

For example, nowadays 6-8 yos learn about slavery with no context and are told they’ll learn about exploration and colonies in 4th grade. No big picture, no context, no perspective. Kid literally didn’t know how the Bad People got there.

Same for science. Learn about First Well known XYZ Scientist but kid doesn’t know who Ben franklin or Madam Curry or Morse or Bell is.

Why can’t the schools teach everything and incorporate the tough social stuff in a straightforward manner? I thought our school did but then realized they are punting context to middle school years.

[Anonymous]

How about the deranged parent that hides behavior problems when they apply to private schools?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

6) School has more opportunities for kids to do things like study abroad, do week-long class trips, etc. There are lots of reasons to choose private beyond what you think you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is from yet another public school parent trying to make themselves feel better about not paying the money to send their child to a private school. Yes private is better and well worth the money.

Last time I checked my public high school had 9 kids admitted to Harvard, 7 Georgetown, and etc....I think someone who had paid $100k for the same outcome who has paid $0 should feel too good.

I can tell you that the 4 big HS in our very well-regarded county COMBINED did not come close to that number of admittance at those 2 schools.

With HS sizes 2800 and 12 valedictorians w/ IB diplomas at our 1 HS —-nope. No public in MoCO, Fairfax or Arlington has had 9 Harvard admits or 7 Georgetown. Must have 0 Harvard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

6) School has more opportunities for kids to do things like study abroad, do week-long class trips, etc. There are lots of reasons to choose private beyond what you think you know.

School sue and getting away from “teach to the test”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How about the deranged parent that hides behavior problems when they apply to private schools?

You don't think teacher recommendations would reflect that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

6) School has more opportunities for kids to do things like study abroad, do week-long class trips, etc. There are lots of reasons to choose private beyond what you think you know.

IF you can afford those extras. They are not cheap. However, my kids also had those trips in public school. A little less expensive, but available both through the school and through outside agencies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How about the deranged parent that hides behavior problems when they apply to private schools?

You don't think teacher recommendations would reflect that?

Definitely not. The teachers are going to write glowing endorsements so they can move the student out of their own classrooms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

Please give a concrete example of a school that does this for a particular kind of kid / family (and doesn't fit into one of the two buckets already listed - religious or kid way outside the norm).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

Please give a concrete example of a school that does this for a particular kind of kid / family (and doesn't fit into one of the two buckets already listed - religious or kid way outside the norm).

Why does s/he need to prove it to you? And why would it be 'way outside the norm"? What's your ax?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

Please give a concrete example of a school that does this for a particular kind of kid / family (and doesn't fit into one of the two buckets already listed - religious or kid way outside the norm).

Here is one for you:

My child went to public and now goes to private HS. In our highly rated local MS, they did not read full books. Instead, they read excerpts of books, never the full books.

My understanding is that this approach of only reading excerpts of books is popular in a lot of public schools these days as a way of getting kids exposure to different types of literature, and also to make the books less intimidating for kids. I understand the educational philosophy behind it, but it was a disaster for my kid, whose writing and reading skills were far behind his peers when he went to private HS. I am putting my younger kids in private at the MS level (public elementary was great).

My kid is not outside the norm. Good at STEM, good public school student, I have been a supporter of public schools and still am. But I was shocked at how bad his reading/writing was compared to the private school kids.

[Anonymous]

PP here. Also, I find it weird you are demanding examples, but as I have a specific example of differing educational philosophy, I provided one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

Please give a concrete example of a school that does this for a particular kind of kid / family (and doesn't fit into one of the two buckets already listed - religious or kid way outside the norm).

Not that PP, but Montessori is an easy example. We have good friends with kids in a Montessori that goes through 8th grade. They are thrilled with that method and wouldn't want to go to a traditional school, weather private or public. It's working perfectly for their kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a long-time resident of this area with experience in both private and public, my experience is that most private school kids fit in 1 of 4 buckets:

1) family wants religious school

2) family has long standing relationship with the school and/or extreme family wealth

3) family is 'new money' and assumes things you pay for are always better, therefore private must be - they don't have much experience with private or public but just like to show off that they have money and be surrounded by people who do

4) kids with specific issues - whether they're exceptionally bright or exceptionally difficult, they're outside the norm in some way (more often negative than positive)

5) School has an approach to education that differs from other schools and align’s with family’s outlook/philosophy

6) School has more opportunities for kids to do things like study abroad, do week-long class trips, etc. There are lots of reasons to choose private beyond what you think you know.

IF you can afford those extras. They are not cheap. However, my kids also had those trips in public school. A little less expensive, but available both through the school and through outside agencies.

Did all the kids in your kids' classes go on the trips? My private had class trips where we went hiking or canoeing or whatever for 10 days as a class. Everyone went and the teachers were our chaperones. It started in sixth grade. I'm not saying kids can't travel at public schools but you're not going to find the entire sixth grade trip hiking through Bryce Canyon for a week in FCPS. Those trips were built into tuition so yes, my parents paid for them, but that's why everyone went.