SAHM with kids in school? Dealing with judgement?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

NP, but that family model doesn’t appeal to me at all. It’s also an enormous risk for those women in the event of divorce or death/disability of the husband.

I do think the person OP is mentioning sounds like a jerk, but those come in all flavors. Just ignore, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

I think it’s the opposite. It makes me sad when a couple is equals prekids and then the woman becomes a SAHM. Because then his career takes off due to her free labor. It’s incredibly unfair to the woman and it’s obvious she’s no longer an equal.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think the post has anything to do with SAHM vs working moms. The woman who accosted you about working is a jerk. It’s inappropriate to insult someone else and next time you should say so or walk away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Not PP but because I wonder what it’s like to not positively contribute to society one bit.

This hardly describes a SAHM.


There a lot of lawyers on this board, though. You should ask them.

Ha!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

Sad thing is I think you really believe this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

I think it’s the opposite. It makes me sad when a couple is equals prekids and then the woman becomes a SAHM. Because then his career takes off due to her free labor. It’s incredibly unfair to the woman and it’s obvious she’s no longer an equal.

And how anyone could argue otherwise is really just ... sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not OP,
My daily schedule:
Monday:
Breakfast,pack Lunches, and walk kids to bus stop.
Dishes, clean house, laundry,make Lunch or dinner.
Read, take online class and rest.
Pick up kids from the bus stop and serve snacks and help with homework.
Drive kids to dance class and drive back home.
Dinner, dishes and and family time before kids take showers and get ready for bed. Read stories to my kindergarten and light out.
It's 8:30pm, clean up kitchen and set kids clothes for next day.
Take my shower and read more before bed! I am super tired by 10pm.

Happy reading and repeat and Rinse the rest of the week. Saturday and Sunday dh takes over. Thank God.

I’m a wohp and this schedule sounds incredibly luxurious to me. That being said, I have lots of friends who are SAHPs and have lots to deal with in their lives and juggling 2 full time jobs would be miserable for their families. I also think other families decisions aren’t usually my business and I refrain from judging with a few exceptions (like not vaccinating).

Sorry, but only if incredibly luxurious = mind-numbing boring.

[Anonymous]

I work out (Pilates, yoga, barre, and spin).

The days I do Pilates I generally take 2 classes - Pilates first, then spin.

I read a lot.

I meet people for lunch or coffee including my husbands and friends who work. We meet up during their breaks.

I do self care: hair and nail appointments. I have to get my roots touched up every 2 weeks.

I clean, do laundry, run errands, etc. so our weekends are totally free. We go skiing a lot in the winter and hiking in the summer in the Finger Lakes area (we live in upstate NY).

After school I run the kids around to their activities.

We have 4 kids so I’m pretty busy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I literally would say, “why would I work if I don’t need the money? YOLO.”

Because people most likely know that isn’t true.

I’m not sure what your background is, but this is true for many.

So why does your husband have to continue to work?

Unsurprisingly, the SAHMs responding here have very poor writing skills and/or don’t seem to speak English as a first language. Therefore - less options.

It’s fewer options, genius.

—SAHM

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

I think it’s the opposite. It makes me sad when a couple is equals prekids and then the woman becomes a SAHM. Because then his career takes off due to her free labor. It’s incredibly unfair to the woman and it’s obvious she’s no longer an equal.

And how anyone could argue otherwise is really just ... sad.

This says a lot about your marriage and none of it is good.

Sorry you have a shitty marriage but don’t take it out on other people. That doesn’t make you smart, it just makes you a bitch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

Sad thing is I think you really believe this.

What is sad is how some women posting here cannot believe it is possible for a man to love, be faithful to, appreciate, value and stay married to his wife if she sah. The arguments that "she contributes nothing", "she is financially dependent", "what will she do when he dumps her" are all based on the belief that a man won't/can't honor his commitment to his wife. I feel bad for the women who married men they can't trust.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work out (Pilates, yoga, barre, and spin).

The days I do Pilates I generally take 2 classes - Pilates first, then spin.

I read a lot.

I meet people for lunch or coffee including my husbands and friends who work. We meet up during their breaks.

I do self care: hair and nail appointments. I have to get my roots touched up every 2 weeks.

I clean, do laundry, run errands, etc. so our weekends are totally free. We go skiing a lot in the winter and hiking in the summer in the Finger Lakes area (we live in upstate NY).

After school I run the kids around to their activities.






Lucky!
We have 4 kids so I’m pretty busy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

I think it’s the opposite. It makes me sad when a couple is equals prekids and then the woman becomes a SAHM. Because then his career takes off due to her free labor. It’s incredibly unfair to the woman and it’s obvious she’s no longer an equal.

And how anyone could argue otherwise is really just ... sad.

This says a lot about your marriage and none of it is good.

Sorry you have a shitty marriage but don’t take it out on other people. That doesn’t make you smart, it just makes you a bitch.

I have a wonderful marriage. Of equals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

I think it’s the opposite. It makes me sad when a couple is equals prekids and then the woman becomes a SAHM. Because then his career takes off due to her free labor. It’s incredibly unfair to the woman and it’s obvious she’s no longer an equal.

And how anyone could argue otherwise is really just ... sad.

This says a lot about your marriage and none of it is good.

Sorry you have a shitty marriage but don’t take it out on other people. That doesn’t make you smart, it just makes you a bitch.

I have a wonderful marriage. Of equals.

Uh huh. That’s why you feel the need to lash out at people who make different choices and be a huge bitch for no reason. Makes complete sense

I’m a working mom by the way. I just don’t think every marriage is centered on money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But seriously, OP, what do you do all day? Do you have some sort of hobby or volunteer gig that takes up your time?

I’m a PP and I’ll repeat what I wrote above. Why is that anyone’s business how she chooses to spend her days?

Because it contributes to the patriarchal society that we all live in and sets a terrible example for children. but SAHMs are selfish by nature, so they don’t care. ME ME MEEE!

Surprised it took that many pages to lay bare what is really behind the animosity towards SAHMs. Its a betrayal of the so-called sisterhood. Note these same folks applaud religious women who put on hijabs as an empowered choice.

The real resentment is also because their staying at home allows their husbands careers to take off which is a big advantage over working women with no such luxury.

I think it’s the opposite. It makes me sad when a couple is equals prekids and then the woman becomes a SAHM. Because then his career takes off due to her free labor. It’s incredibly unfair to the woman and it’s obvious she’s no longer an equal.

And how anyone could argue otherwise is really just ... sad.

This says a lot about your marriage and none of it is good.

Sorry you have a shitty marriage but don’t take it out on other people. That doesn’t make you smart, it just makes you a bitch.

It says a lot about a marriage that you want to be paid for your labor? Does this mean that all men have shitty marriages...because most men, especially white males, refuse to work for free. That’s something usually only women do.