DH having an attitude after strip club

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

You can think what you want. I consider it sex work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you go to Camelot?

I knew girls who worked there in the late 90s. They were cool girls. Troubled, but cool. You should hear what strippers think of people who go to clubs.

LOL you should try to imagine how much I care about the good opinion of stupid sluts who dance naked for money.

Ok, wow. Former dancer here. I now have a family and professional job, and you would never, ever know about my past employment. Women I worked with are now lawyers, real estate agents, computer programmers, librarians, social workers, nurses, etc. Honestly everyone reading this thread probably knows a former dancer and has no idea, so I would watch it with sentiments like this. Most women who work in strip clubs aren't "stupid sluts", in my experience it was usually college students and moms who wanted to work three days a week and spend the rest of the time with their kids. I for one am one of the only people I know that didn't have family pay for college and has no student loans. So.

On to what dancers think of customers. Honestly, female customers were the bane of my existence. Women either think they have a license to get handsy and that the rules don't apply to them because they're women, or get super jealous about their dad bod husband they came with. Newsflash: chris rock wasn't lying when he said there was no sex in the champagne room. Dancers just want to make money and are not trying to get with your loser husbands. Dancing is basically a hardcore sales job, so everything that is said and done is done with the goal of selling dances. Sob story? Probably not true, just a hustle. Smooth talking about how attractive and fun the customer is? Also a hustle.

As for OP, next time you go you should talk with your husband first about what your boundaries are.

...aaaaand there it is. These well-adjusted, undamaged, totally not trafficked individuals view men to be losers and women to be the bane of their existence.

You are intentionally misreading my post. People were curious about what dancers think of customers, I'm telling you my opinion from my lived experience. I did not enjoy most female customers because of the issues mentioned above: jealousy, thinking the rules don't apply to them, etc. And yes, usually the female customers that acted the most jealous and crazy were sad middle aged frumps with loser husbands. Did I say all men were losers? No. Some men are losers, specifically the men that came to strip clubs with these sad, sad ladies. I don't think finding this behavior unpleasant makes me damaged or trafficked (again LOL.) I will say, anecdotally, that I usually didn't see this kind of jealous, weird behavior from attractive, secure women.

I find it interesting how a few of you seem so hell bent on posting this tired stereotype about how dancers are damaged, trafficked, slutty, etc when there are at least two or maybe three former dancers in this thread saying, No, this is not the case.

Trust me, all of you have at least one former stripper in your extended circle and you have no idea.

you may not be damaged, but you sure aren't a good person or a feminist.

New poster here. One who went with a boyfriend to a club 30 years ago. Now I’m old. Wasn’t jealous, but it’s not my thing. Dancing wouldn’t be my thing, either. But what’s with all the hate on the dancers? If a woman is doing something of her own free will, that’s fine in my book. Not hurting a soul. Feminism absolutely supports that.

NP: But this dancer isn't a feminist, she is judgemental about other women based on their looks. Her comments about the sad middle ages frumps is really quite awful. I'm sure looks mean a great deal to her.

Sounds like she hit a nerve with you.

Nothing she said was even close to being as offensive as the original degrading comment about strippers.

So it's ok to call older women "frumps" with "loser husbands" if you feel insulted?? I don't think saying that many/most sex workers have troubling circumstances, or that sex work is likely a degrading or psychologically harmful profession for most, is "slut shaming" either.

It’s not,

[Anonymous]

Once again, women are blaming women for men’s shortcomings.

Former strippers: I have no problem with what you do. I don’t think it makes you slutty. But those “frumpy” women- you have no idea what is going on in their marriage. Maybe he has a history of cheating, or maybe they are struggling to make ends meet and he’s blowing their money on you, or maybe he’s neglecting his kids. Maybe it is all harmless fun and she’s just insecure. But we all have issues, and we all want a partner who is able to see *our* needs rather than just their own. So maybe you can empathize with a woman who has vocalized something causes her pain, and her partner has decided to put his own desires first.

Wives/girlfriends: Blaming other women doesn’t work. Even if all the strippers suddenly disappeared from earth, your husband would still find a way to be a creep. If it’s that distasteful to you, remember that men only really understand consequences. My DH and all my former boyfriends knew that if they ever were to step foot in a strip club, the relationship would be over. No begging, pleading, yelling, counseling, or any other type of drama. I would pack my things and go. Sometimes I did. Sometimes they ended it because they didn’t want that restriction. That was fine with me. Instead of “I don’t like women who are a threat”, it needs to be “I don’t like men who make me feel threatened”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe people actually go to these clubs. Gah I can only imagine what body fluids are on every surface. Gross. Just so nasty. Nevermind having some strange gyrating near your face. Its anyones guess where that's been too.

I can’t believe how many women don’t understand men at all.

—woman

I've met plenty of men who don't enjoy strip clubs.

PP here. So have I, but the whole “ew so nasty, who likes that?” argument sounds ridiculous. Like these places are in business because no one goes there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

You can think what you want. I consider it sex work.

Well, you can consider that the sky is green.
That doesn’t mean you’re correct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

You can think what you want. I consider it sex work.

Well, you can consider that the sky is green.
That doesn’t mean you’re correct.

Pot meet kettle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Once again, women are blaming women for men’s shortcomings.

Former strippers: I have no problem with what you do. I don’t think it makes you slutty. But those “frumpy” women- you have no idea what is going on in their marriage. Maybe he has a history of cheating, or maybe they are struggling to make ends meet and he’s blowing their money on you, or maybe he’s neglecting his kids. Maybe it is all harmless fun and she’s just insecure. But we all have issues, and we all want a partner who is able to see *our* needs rather than just their own. So maybe you can empathize with a woman who has vocalized something causes her pain, and her partner has decided to put his own desires first.

Wives/girlfriends: Blaming other women doesn’t work. Even if all the strippers suddenly disappeared from earth, your husband would still find a way to be a creep. If it’s that distasteful to you, remember that men only really understand consequences. My DH and all my former boyfriends knew that if they ever were to step foot in a strip club, the relationship would be over. No begging, pleading, yelling, counseling, or any other type of drama. I would pack my things and go. Sometimes I did. Sometimes they ended it because they didn’t want that restriction. That was fine with me. Instead of “I don’t like women who are a threat”, it needs to be “I don’t like men who make me feel threatened”.

Wow. Just...wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

Um what? What do you the end goal is of exotic dancing?! It's absolutely sex work. Men aren't going to listen to the women debate world Peace... Despite that all the strippers are working their way through Harvard (lmao!!)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

Um what? What do you the end goal is of exotic dancing?! It's absolutely sex work. Men aren't going to listen to the women debate world Peace... Despite that all the strippers are working their way through Harvard (lmao!!)

Um what yourself. Not all dancers escort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

Um what? What do you the end goal is of exotic dancing?! It's absolutely sex work. Men aren't going to listen to the women debate world Peace... Despite that all the strippers are working their way through Harvard (lmao!!)

So, you're saying you think after the dance sex is expected? Sex is the goal and if men are paying for a strip tease they should also get sex? I just want to make sure I understand your flawed logic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

You can think what you want. I consider it sex work.

Well, you can consider that the sky is green.
That doesn’t mean you’re correct.

How is stripping not sex work? The entire purpose is to dance to get men sexually aroused

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

Um what? What do you the end goal is of exotic dancing?! It's absolutely sex work. Men aren't going to listen to the women debate world Peace... Despite that all the strippers are working their way through Harvard (lmao!!)

Um what yourself. Not all dancers escort.

Never said they were though a lot of them are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you go to Camelot?

I knew girls who worked there in the late 90s. They were cool girls. Troubled, but cool. You should hear what strippers think of people who go to clubs.

LOL you should try to imagine how much I care about the good opinion of stupid sluts who dance naked for money.

Ok, wow. Former dancer here. I now have a family and professional job, and you would never, ever know about my past employment. Women I worked with are now lawyers, real estate agents, computer programmers, librarians, social workers, nurses, etc. Honestly everyone reading this thread probably knows a former dancer and has no idea, so I would watch it with sentiments like this. Most women who work in strip clubs aren't "stupid sluts", in my experience it was usually college students and moms who wanted to work three days a week and spend the rest of the time with their kids. I for one am one of the only people I know that didn't have family pay for college and has no student loans. So.

On to what dancers think of customers. Honestly, female customers were the bane of my existence. Women either think they have a license to get handsy and that the rules don't apply to them because they're women, or get super jealous about their dad bod husband they came with. Newsflash: chris rock wasn't lying when he said there was no sex in the champagne room. Dancers just want to make money and are not trying to get with your loser husbands. Dancing is basically a hardcore sales job, so everything that is said and done is done with the goal of selling dances. Sob story? Probably not true, just a hustle. Smooth talking about how attractive and fun the customer is? Also a hustle.

As for OP, next time you go you should talk with your husband first about what your boundaries are.

...aaaaand there it is. These well-adjusted, undamaged, totally not trafficked individuals view men to be losers and women to be the bane of their existence.

You are intentionally misreading my post. People were curious about what dancers think of customers, I'm telling you my opinion from my lived experience. I did not enjoy most female customers because of the issues mentioned above: jealousy, thinking the rules don't apply to them, etc. And yes, usually the female customers that acted the most jealous and crazy were sad middle aged frumps with loser husbands. Did I say all men were losers? No. Some men are losers, specifically the men that came to strip clubs with these sad, sad ladies. I don't think finding this behavior unpleasant makes me damaged or trafficked (again LOL.) I will say, anecdotally, that I usually didn't see this kind of jealous, weird behavior from attractive, secure women.

I find it interesting how a few of you seem so hell bent on posting this tired stereotype about how dancers are damaged, trafficked, slutty, etc when there are at least two or maybe three former dancers in this thread saying, No, this is not the case.

Trust me, all of you have at least one former stripper in your extended circle and you have no idea.

you may not be damaged, but you sure aren't a good person or a feminist.

... says the Church Lady ... sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Once again, women are blaming women for men’s shortcomings.

Former strippers: I have no problem with what you do. I don’t think it makes you slutty. But those “frumpy” women- you have no idea what is going on in their marriage. Maybe he has a history of cheating, or maybe they are struggling to make ends meet and he’s blowing their money on you, or maybe he’s neglecting his kids. Maybe it is all harmless fun and she’s just insecure. But we all have issues, and we all want a partner who is able to see *our* needs rather than just their own. So maybe you can empathize with a woman who has vocalized something causes her pain, and her partner has decided to put his own desires first.

Wives/girlfriends: Blaming other women doesn’t work. Even if all the strippers suddenly disappeared from earth, your husband would still find a way to be a creep. If it’s that distasteful to you, remember that men only really understand consequences. My DH and all my former boyfriends knew that if they ever were to step foot in a strip club, the relationship would be over. No begging, pleading, yelling, counseling, or any other type of drama. I would pack my things and go. Sometimes I did. Sometimes they ended it because they didn’t want that restriction. That was fine with me. Instead of “I don’t like women who are a threat”, it needs to be “I don’t like men who make me feel threatened”.

Wow. Just...wow.

I thought it was a good comment. Did you have an issue with it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't equate exotic dancing with sex work and I think it is dangerous to confound the two.

You can think what you want. I consider it sex work.

Well, you can consider that the sky is green.
That doesn’t mean you’re correct.

How is stripping not sex work? The entire purpose is to dance to get men sexually aroused

So, many actresses on TV programs and in movies are also sex workers in your mind.