Bathroom at school: teacher said no

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You may want to to offer the teacher some suggestions. We have a restroom signal that students use during independent work times (they signal, I nod, and they pick a partner and go). I have two half hour periods during the day when I don't let my students use the bathroom--whole group reading and math lessons. There are also two 15-20 minute whole group mini-lesson/direction-giving periods for science and social studies. Students are allowed to go during the morning and afternoon warm-ups, independent work times/literacy and math stations, and before lunch and recess. I've never had a student have an accident with this restroom policy.

Not yet....

Seriously? You don't think kids can go 30 minutes without using the bathroom when they have the chance to go before or after? After fifteen years of teaching, with no bathroom accidents, and no parent complaints about my bathroom policy, I think it works. The key is flexibility. My students know I will never yell at them, and they feel comfortable telling me if they can't wait a few minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teacher here. I'm really sorry that happened. She should know to say that it's an emergency if it is, though, especially if the schools policy is twice a day. I am a middle school teacher so it's a bit different, and sometimes students claim "emergency" when it's not. A teacher may say not right now and not know it's an emergency. I agree with the walking out if it's a true emergency.

I will never forget when I was in second grade and a classmate was denied going to the bathroom. She was wearing a dress and stockings, made a big triangle by spreading her legs and just peed all over the floor.

No. It's not the schools policy to have two bathroom breaks a day, and even if it was, that's bs. A good teacher would stand up for the students right to use the toilet when they need to. What's so important that kids should have to "hold it in" until class bathroom break? Nothing is. How about you only get two bathroom breaks a day? Wouldn't like that, would you?

Teacher PP here. As a teacher, my ability to use the bathroom is restricted as well! I did not mean to imply that what happened is okay- just that children, especially young children, should be aware it is okay to share that it's an emergency. Maybe the teacher has multiple students asking to go at once; maybe she knows there's a fire drill in 7 minutes, teachers make a million split second decisions a day and are human and therefore imperfect. I am simply stating In a school, it is not always possible for EVERY child to use the bathroom at the EXACT moment they want to- that's why if it's an emergency, that must be shared.

[Anonymous]

PP, how dare you compare your restriction to use the bathroom to a CHILDS bathroom restriction. You are an adult.

I'm a teacher and am appalled at your reasoning. I know my students and love them and I'm aware that even some in my room cannot say when something is an emergency. Even in my classroom, I know some students just won't say that. That's a big thing for a kid to say in front of the classroom and to a teacher. What's an emergency to a kid? A fire? Having to go pee might not be an emergency. Or is it?

Just as teachers make a million decisions a day, as does a child. It doesn't sound like the fire alarm was about to go off or that recess was over. It sounds like a crappy policy to have and a crappy teacher who would enforce that rule. Like PP said, a good teacher would stand up for her children's RIGHT to use the bathroom.

I'd be heartbroken if my students were too scared to ask to use the bathroom and peed themselves instead. I'd feel like a failure to not have their trust. These are CHILDREN.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You may want to to offer the teacher some suggestions. We have a restroom signal that students use during independent work times (they signal, I nod, and they pick a partner and go). I have two half hour periods during the day when I don't let my students use the bathroom--whole group reading and math lessons. There are also two 15-20 minute whole group mini-lesson/direction-giving periods for science and social studies. Students are allowed to go during the morning and afternoon warm-ups, independent work times/literacy and math stations, and before lunch and recess. I've never had a student have an accident with this restroom policy.

Not yet....

Seriously? You don't think kids can go 30 minutes without using the bathroom when they have the chance to go before or after? After fifteen years of teaching, with no bathroom accidents, and no parent complaints about my bathroom policy, I think it works. The key is flexibility. My students know I will never yell at them, and they feel comfortable telling me if they can't wait a few minutes.

I'm going to ignore your bogus logic and point out your last sentence to OP. Your child, OP, isn't comfortable enough with her teacher to say she has go to bathroom. That's alarming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP, how dare you compare your restriction to use the bathroom to a CHILDS bathroom restriction. You are an adult.

I'm a teacher and am appalled at your reasoning. I know my students and love them and I'm aware that even some in my room cannot say when something is an emergency. Even in my classroom, I know some students just won't say that. That's a big thing for a kid to say in front of the classroom and to a teacher. What's an emergency to a kid? A fire? Having to go pee might not be an emergency. Or is it?

Just as teachers make a million decisions a day, as does a child. It doesn't sound like the fire alarm was about to go off or that recess was over. It sounds like a crappy policy to have and a crappy teacher who would enforce that rule. Like PP said, a good teacher would stand up for her children's RIGHT to use the bathroom.

I'd be heartbroken if my students were too scared to ask to use the bathroom and peed themselves instead. I'd feel like a failure to not have their trust. These are CHILDREN.

The PP asked how I would like it if I could use the bathroom only twice a day- while I do not have that restriction, I do have periods up to almost three hours where I can't use the bathroom, so I have to plan around that. I've also had times when I had to have a colleague help me out so I could use the bathroom in between classes. Of course it's not the same as a child. Just stating my own opinion that if it is urgent, the child should be able to use the bathroom, and they should be comfortable asking.

My opinion is probably colored by the fact that I get multiple middle school students asking to go at the same time. My school is very strict- one at a time, you must have a pass, and they lock the bathrooms for the first hour a day (which I hate and think is illegal).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:CPS? Really? Child abuse? Talk to a kid with cigarette burns about whether this is child abuse.

Stop complaining about that sprained ankle!!! At least its not a broken leg!!!

Oh stop it! Being asked to go before school, after school, at lunch, at two breaks, and whenever it's an emergency is NOT CHILD ABUSE! You people are crazy!!! You are out of your God forsaken minds. No principal will look you in the eye and take your side. But feel free to try. Report back when you get a school wide policy memo. CPS will laugh you off the phone. Why don't you call them and pose a hypothetical and see what they say?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP, how dare you compare your restriction to use the bathroom to a CHILDS bathroom restriction. You are an adult.

I'm a teacher and am appalled at your reasoning. I know my students and love them and I'm aware that even some in my room cannot say when something is an emergency. Even in my classroom, I know some students just won't say that. That's a big thing for a kid to say in front of the classroom and to a teacher. What's an emergency to a kid? A fire? Having to go pee might not be an emergency. Or is it?

Just as teachers make a million decisions a day, as does a child. It doesn't sound like the fire alarm was about to go off or that recess was over. It sounds like a crappy policy to have and a crappy teacher who would enforce that rule. Like PP said, a good teacher would stand up for her children's RIGHT to use the bathroom.

I'd be heartbroken if my students were too scared to ask to use the bathroom and peed themselves instead. I'd feel like a failure to not have their trust. These are CHILDREN.

The PP asked how I would like it if I could use the bathroom only twice a day- while I do not have that restriction, I do have periods up to almost three hours where I can't use the bathroom, so I have to plan around that. I've also had times when I had to have a colleague help me out so I could use the bathroom in between classes. Of course it's not the same as a child. Just stating my own opinion that if it is urgent, the child should be able to use the bathroom, and they should be comfortable asking.

My opinion is probably colored by the fact that I get multiple middle school students asking to go at the same time. My school is very strict- one at a time, you must have a pass, and they lock the bathrooms for the first hour a day (which I hate and think is illegal).

Yes, your opinion is very different. This is elementary school. The child wasn't goofing off or trying to use her cell phone. She was trying to go the bathroom.

[Anonymous]

I find this whole thread really interesting considering the whole trans* bathroom/locker debate right now.

Little girl - no bathroom for you just piss yourself

Trans - here choose any bathroom you please

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:CPS? Really? Child abuse? Talk to a kid with cigarette burns about whether this is child abuse.

Stop complaining about that sprained ankle!!! At least its not a broken leg!!!

Oh stop it! Being asked to go before school, after school, at lunch, at two breaks, and whenever it's an emergency is NOT CHILD ABUSE! You people are crazy!!! You are out of your God forsaken minds. No principal will look you in the eye and take your side. But feel free to try. Report back when you get a school wide policy memo. CPS will laugh you off the phone. Why don't you call them and pose a hypothetical and see what they say?

You're willfully ignoring the part about refusing an emergency without a "code word" the child doesn't know. Making them pee themselves is at the very least neglect. Don't believe it? Ask CPS. I don't know what school you are familiar with but no principal worth their salt would allow it to continue if complaints came in and yes, a memo likely WOULD go out, though the parents wouldn't be privy to it.

You're an idiot.

[Anonymous]

It is awful that OP's daughter wet her pants. Absolutely awful.

However, I can understand the teacher's position. Kids (even elementary) use the bathroom as an excuse to just leave the room. Go wander the school, whatever. We've had teachers who don't allow bathroom breaks during instruction. I don't have a problem with that. Kids are encouraged to go (as others have said) before school, at breaks, during lunch and after school.

OP obviously a discussion with the teacher is necessary. Make sure too that your daughter knows that if it really is an emergency, she should just go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find this whole thread really interesting considering the whole trans* bathroom/locker debate right now.

Little girl - no bathroom for you just piss yourself

Trans - here choose any bathroom you please

Oh, shut up and go to the political forum. You are talking about apples and oranges, WHEN vs WHICH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You may want to to offer the teacher some suggestions. We have a restroom signal that students use during independent work times (they signal, I nod, and they pick a partner and go). I have two half hour periods during the day when I don't let my students use the bathroom--whole group reading and math lessons. There are also two 15-20 minute whole group mini-lesson/direction-giving periods for science and social studies. Students are allowed to go during the morning and afternoon warm-ups, independent work times/literacy and math stations, and before lunch and recess. I've never had a student have an accident with this restroom policy.

Not yet....

Seriously? You don't think kids can go 30 minutes without using the bathroom when they have the chance to go before or after? After fifteen years of teaching, with no bathroom accidents, and no parent complaints about my bathroom policy, I think it works. The key is flexibility. My students know I will never yell at them, and they feel comfortable telling me if they can't wait a few minutes.

I think you've gotten lucky with the kids you've had. My son doesn't usually realize that he has to pee until basically it's an emergency. He rarely even pees at school because he holds it so long. One day in first grade as a math unit started he asked to go to the bathroom. Teacher said wait because she has a similar policy as you. He asked two additional times because he really had to go urgently. This teacher didn't have a wacky code word or whatever. You would think asking three times was a clue. Anyway, he peed his pants. She was deeply apologetic later but explained that she had this policy to prevent too many kids collecting in the bathroom. Nevermind that my kid has never abused this and rarely asks. The teacher also said that this policy was encouraged by the principal.

Anyway, you should be lucky that your kids haven't had an accident. If a kid has to go, just fucking let them go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is awful that OP's daughter wet her pants. Absolutely awful.

However, I can understand the teacher's position. Kids (even elementary) use the bathroom as an excuse to just leave the room. Go wander the school, whatever. We've had teachers who don't allow bathroom breaks during instruction. I don't have a problem with that. Kids are encouraged to go (as others have said) before school, at breaks, during lunch and after school.

OP obviously a discussion with the teacher is necessary. Make sure too that your daughter knows that if it really is an emergency, she should just go.

Op here. They were doing seat work. The first time she asked she was told no. Several minutes later she asked again (which to me should have given the teacher a hint that my daughter really did have to go!) she was told no again. My daughter always goes in the morning before school. I don't know if she goes during the class bathroom breaks or not. Every teacher she's had before this one has allowed kids to go to the bathroom whenever they need to. I don't remember ever hearing my daughter talk about class bathroom breaks. I remember my teachers doing this in elementary school, but my daughter never told me about it and the first I heard of it was when I spoke to the teacher. This teacher is very controlling and I'm glad the year is almost over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You may want to to offer the teacher some suggestions. We have a restroom signal that students use during independent work times (they signal, I nod, and they pick a partner and go). I have two half hour periods during the day when I don't let my students use the bathroom--whole group reading and math lessons. There are also two 15-20 minute whole group mini-lesson/direction-giving periods for science and social studies. Students are allowed to go during the morning and afternoon warm-ups, independent work times/literacy and math stations, and before lunch and recess. I've never had a student have an accident with this restroom policy.

Not yet....

Seriously? You don't think kids can go 30 minutes without using the bathroom when they have the chance to go before or after? After fifteen years of teaching, with no bathroom accidents, and no parent complaints about my bathroom policy, I think it works. The key is flexibility. My students know I will never yell at them, and they feel comfortable telling me if they can't wait a few minutes.

I think you've gotten lucky with the kids you've had. My son doesn't usually realize that he has to pee until basically it's an emergency. He rarely even pees at school because he holds it so long. One day in first grade as a math unit started he asked to go to the bathroom. Teacher said wait because she has a similar policy as you. He asked two additional times because he really had to go urgently. This teacher didn't have a wacky code word or whatever. You would think asking three times was a clue. Anyway, he peed his pants. She was deeply apologetic later but explained that she had this policy to prevent too many kids collecting in the bathroom. Nevermind that my kid has never abused this and rarely asks. The teacher also said that this policy was encouraged by the principal.

Anyway, you should be lucky that your kids haven't had an accident. If a kid has to go, just fucking let them go.

Op here. ok I think this poster just summed up the thread. I wish you were my friend pp, the bolded part just made me so happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You may want to to offer the teacher some suggestions. We have a restroom signal that students use during independent work times (they signal, I nod, and they pick a partner and go). I have two half hour periods during the day when I don't let my students use the bathroom--whole group reading and math lessons. There are also two 15-20 minute whole group mini-lesson/direction-giving periods for science and social studies. Students are allowed to go during the morning and afternoon warm-ups, independent work times/literacy and math stations, and before lunch and recess. I've never had a student have an accident with this restroom policy.

Not yet....

Seriously? You don't think kids can go 30 minutes without using the bathroom when they have the chance to go before or after? After fifteen years of teaching, with no bathroom accidents, and no parent complaints about my bathroom policy, I think it works. The key is flexibility. My students know I will never yell at them, and they feel comfortable telling me if they can't wait a few minutes.

I think you've gotten lucky with the kids you've had. My son doesn't usually realize that he has to pee until basically it's an emergency. He rarely even pees at school because he holds it so long. One day in first grade as a math unit started he asked to go to the bathroom. Teacher said wait because she has a similar policy as you. He asked two additional times because he really had to go urgently. This teacher didn't have a wacky code word or whatever. You would think asking three times was a clue. Anyway, he peed his pants. She was deeply apologetic later but explained that she had this policy to prevent too many kids collecting in the bathroom. Nevermind that my kid has never abused this and rarely asks. The teacher also said that this policy was encouraged by the principal.

Anyway, you should be lucky that your kids haven't had an accident. If a kid has to go, just fucking let them go.

Op here. ok I think this poster just summed up the thread. I wish you were my friend pp, the bolded part just made me so happy.

It's a basic human need.