Bathroom at school: teacher said no

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did I miss the part where the kid pooped her pants? Actually pooped? If your kid feels poop coming out, and doesn't ring the emergency bell, I dare say her mother needs to teach her not to be treated like a doormat. And if it is the more ghastly and emergent diarrhea then why is she in school if she's sick? Either way that's a parental fail.

This is about preparing your child in advance. Teach your child what to do to advocate for themselves in your absence. Give them life skills. Kindergarten and first grade is not too young. There is an "emergency" out for this very reason. Teach them not to wait until the last minute (this you can practice endlessly at home) and teach them to tell the teacher they are about to have an accident.

You missed the part where the elementary aged child peed her pants after having an authority figure tell her no twice.

But I didnt. There's an emergency out. Kid didn't use it. Parent fail. Teach your kids to stand up for themselves!

Requiring a kid to use a special word to be allowed to use them bathroom when they have asked twice is a dick move. Complete and total teacher fail.

Totally agree. Which is why if you don't prepare your kid to deal with it then it' crosses over to a parent fail. There are aholes in all walks of life. Even elementary school. Our job as parents is to give them the confidence to stand up to adults in certain situations and this is clearly one. Op said this happened once already. That's the point where to put it more "sensitively", the opportunity was missed. that was the teachable moment. Because there are loser jerk teachers and bosses all throughout life. Mommy can't always defend you or get you a new nice teacher. You gotta deal. You need skills. You need a plan. That's the parents job and why no, it isn't a complete and total teacher fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sorry she has such a crappy teacher but I think you need to drive home the point that she sometimes in life will need to pick the least worst option which in this case is to pee yourself or risk getting yelled at.

Gee, thanks for the advice. You don't think I've done that already? It takes a lot of courage for a 9 year old girl, who has never been in trouble at school, to stand up and walk out while more than 25 classmates plus the teacher are watching. She asked more than once on both occasions where she peed her pants, if she could go to the bathroom and was told no every time. Just because she didn't use the secret password (EMERGENCY!) she was told to sit down.

OP, you should demand a meeting with the principal. The teacher is completely unfit. If the principal doesn't fix things, go to your board member. Keep going. It is ABUSIVE to force kids to pee themselves.

I told the teacher that I hope my daughter never gets denied permission to use the restroom ever again and that it should not need to reach the level of emergency. I don't want to go to the principal yet because my daughter will be there for the rest of elementary school. If there is ever another problem like this again, I will not hesitate to meet with the principal though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What school, OP? You should spread the word on what an awful school and awful teacher is out there. Shame her like she shames little kids.

It's tempting, but I don't want to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did I miss the part where the kid pooped her pants? Actually pooped? If your kid feels poop coming out, and doesn't ring the emergency bell, I dare say her mother needs to teach her not to be treated like a doormat. And if it is the more ghastly and emergent diarrhea then why is she in school if she's sick? Either way that's a parental fail.

This is about preparing your child in advance. Teach your child what to do to advocate for themselves in your absence. Give them life skills. Kindergarten and first grade is not too young. There is an "emergency" out for this very reason. Teach them not to wait until the last minute (this you can practice endlessly at home) and teach them to tell the teacher they are about to have an accident.

You missed the part where the elementary aged child peed her pants after having an authority figure tell her no twice.

But I didnt. There's an emergency out. Kid didn't use it. Parent fail. Teach your kids to stand up for themselves!

Requiring a kid to use a special word to be allowed to use them bathroom when they have asked twice is a dick move. Complete and total teacher fail.

Totally agree. Which is why if you don't prepare your kid to deal with it then it' crosses over to a parent fail. There are aholes in all walks of life. Even elementary school. Our job as parents is to give them the confidence to stand up to adults in certain situations and this is clearly one. Op said this happened once already. That's the point where to put it more "sensitively", the opportunity was missed. that was the teachable moment. Because there are loser jerk teachers and bosses all throughout life. Mommy can't always defend you or get you a new nice teacher. You gotta deal. You need skills. You need a plan. That's the parents job and why no, it isn't a complete and total teacher fail.

You sound like you THINK you know a whole lot about something that you actually know NOTHING about!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sorry she has such a crappy teacher but I think you need to drive home the point that she sometimes in life will need to pick the least worst option which in this case is to pee yourself or risk getting yelled at.

Gee, thanks for the advice. You don't think I've done that already? It takes a lot of courage for a 9 year old girl, who has never been in trouble at school, to stand up and walk out while more than 25 classmates plus the teacher are watching. She asked more than once on both occasions where she peed her pants, if she could go to the bathroom and was told no every time. Just because she didn't use the secret password (EMERGENCY!) she was told to sit down.

OP, you should demand a meeting with the principal. The teacher is completely unfit. If the principal doesn't fix things, go to your board member. Keep going. It is ABUSIVE to force kids to pee themselves.

THIS!!! I can't believe there are people saying this is a parent or child fail! This is completely wrong of the teacher!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sorry she has such a crappy teacher but I think you need to drive home the point that she sometimes in life will need to pick the least worst option which in this case is to pee yourself or risk getting yelled at.

Gee, thanks for the advice. You don't think I've done that already? It takes a lot of courage for a 9 year old girl, who has never been in trouble at school, to stand up and walk out while more than 25 classmates plus the teacher are watching. She asked more than once on both occasions where she peed her pants, if she could go to the bathroom and was told no every time. Just because she didn't use the secret password (EMERGENCY!) she was told to sit down.

OP, you should demand a meeting with the principal. The teacher is completely unfit. If the principal doesn't fix things, go to your board member. Keep going. It is ABUSIVE to force kids to pee themselves.

THIS!!! I can't believe there are people saying this is a parent or child fail! This is completely wrong of the teacher!

Fortunately I don't think "people" are saying this. It seems like the same idiot over and over again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did I miss the part where the kid pooped her pants? Actually pooped? If your kid feels poop coming out, and doesn't ring the emergency bell, I dare say her mother needs to teach her not to be treated like a doormat. And if it is the more ghastly and emergent diarrhea then why is she in school if she's sick? Either way that's a parental fail.

This is about preparing your child in advance. Teach your child what to do to advocate for themselves in your absence. Give them life skills. Kindergarten and first grade is not too young. There is an "emergency" out for this very reason. Teach them not to wait until the last minute (this you can practice endlessly at home) and teach them to tell the teacher they are about to have an accident.

You missed the part where the elementary aged child peed her pants after having an authority figure tell her no twice.

But I didnt. There's an emergency out. Kid didn't use it. Parent fail. Teach your kids to stand up for themselves!

Requiring a kid to use a special word to be allowed to use them bathroom when they have asked twice is a dick move. Complete and total teacher fail.

Totally agree. Which is why if you don't prepare your kid to deal with it then it' crosses over to a parent fail. There are aholes in all walks of life. Even elementary school. Our job as parents is to give them the confidence to stand up to adults in certain situations and this is clearly one. Op said this happened once already. That's the point where to put it more "sensitively", the opportunity was missed. that was the teachable moment. Because there are loser jerk teachers and bosses all throughout life. Mommy can't always defend you or get you a new nice teacher. You gotta deal. You need skills. You need a plan. That's the parents job and why no, it isn't a complete and total teacher fail.

You sound like you THINK you know a whole lot about something that you actually know NOTHING about!

I know nothing about peeing? Holding it? Being 9? Being in school? Standing up for myself? Parenting?
Just because I see it differently than you doesn't mean I know nothing. My perspective is different. I don't think the teacher was right. I do not blame the child. It doesn't change the reality. The teacher doesn't interrupt class for bathroom breaks. She rolled her eyes after op yelled at her. The teacher is wrong. But whatever. The kid still peed her pants. For the second time in elementary school and she's NINE!! I feel sorry for her. Good luck to you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sorry she has such a crappy teacher but I think you need to drive home the point that she sometimes in life will need to pick the least worst option which in this case is to pee yourself or risk getting yelled at.

Gee, thanks for the advice. You don't think I've done that already? It takes a lot of courage for a 9 year old girl, who has never been in trouble at school, to stand up and walk out while more than 25 classmates plus the teacher are watching. She asked more than once on both occasions where she peed her pants, if she could go to the bathroom and was told no every time. Just because she didn't use the secret password (EMERGENCY!) she was told to sit down.

OP, you should demand a meeting with the principal. The teacher is completely unfit. If the principal doesn't fix things, go to your board member. Keep going. It is ABUSIVE to force kids to pee themselves.

THIS!!! I can't believe there are people saying this is a parent or child fail! This is completely wrong of the teacher!

+2

You should make a record of this OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teacher here. I'm really sorry that happened. She should know to say that it's an emergency if it is, though, especially if the schools policy is twice a day. I am a middle school teacher so it's a bit different, and sometimes students claim "emergency" when it's not. A teacher may say not right now and not know it's an emergency. I agree with the walking out if it's a true emergency.

I will never forget when I was in second grade and a classmate was denied going to the bathroom. She was wearing a dress and stockings, made a big triangle by spreading her legs and just peed all over the floor.

OP - tell your kid to pee on the teacher's floor if she won't let her go.

[Anonymous]

Too many teachers have this philosophy of not letting kids go to the bathroom. I taught 1st grade and 2nd grades for 7 years and my policy was that you try to go during recess but if you need to go you can go. I also told my 1st graders that if they tried to go during recess but if it was too crowded or kids were being silly that they could let me know and I would send them when we got back to the classroom. I also let them all know that if they went to the bathroom and there were bigger kids there that made them feel uncomfortable they could come right back and tell me and I would send them again in a few minutes. I also told them if they needed more time for number 2 and they didn't think they would have enough time at recess they could go when there were no classes at recess so no one would bother them (looking under stall, trying to open door, etc.). My students never really abused this policy. I sometimes had a few squirmy kids who did go frequently but I figured they needed a 3 minute break to stretch, then they would come back and focus. I announced my policy to the parents at the beginning of the year. I was amazed at how many parents thanked me for my bathroom policy throughout my years teaching.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school, OP? You should spread the word on what an awful school and awful teacher is out there. Shame her like she shames little kids.

It's tempting, but I don't want to say.

Is it BE?....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did I miss the part where the kid pooped her pants? Actually pooped? If your kid feels poop coming out, and doesn't ring the emergency bell, I dare say her mother needs to teach her not to be treated like a doormat. And if it is the more ghastly and emergent diarrhea then why is she in school if she's sick? Either way that's a parental fail.

This is about preparing your child in advance. Teach your child what to do to advocate for themselves in your absence. Give them life skills. Kindergarten and first grade is not too young. There is an "emergency" out for this very reason. Teach them not to wait until the last minute (this you can practice endlessly at home) and teach them to tell the teacher they are about to have an accident.

You missed the part where the elementary aged child peed her pants after having an authority figure tell her no twice.

But I didnt. There's an emergency out. Kid didn't use it. Parent fail. Teach your kids to stand up for themselves!

Requiring a kid to use a special word to be allowed to use them bathroom when they have asked twice is a dick move. Complete and total teacher fail.

Totally agree. Which is why if you don't prepare your kid to deal with it then it' crosses over to a parent fail. There are aholes in all walks of life. Even elementary school. Our job as parents is to give them the confidence to stand up to adults in certain situations and this is clearly one. Op said this happened once already. That's the point where to put it more "sensitively", the opportunity was missed. that was the teachable moment. Because there are loser jerk teachers and bosses all throughout life. Mommy can't always defend you or get you a new nice teacher. You gotta deal. You need skills. You need a plan. That's the parents job and why no, it isn't a complete and total teacher fail.

This is ridiculous. Who has time to teach their kids what to do if they need to pee and aren't allowed to use the restroom? What else should we be imagining they may face, to prepare them in advance for handling?

We have a similar teacher. Won't allow kids to go to the bathroom or to the nurse or to drink water. I spoke with the school and said my DC has my permission. They hate me now but -- so what.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What school, OP? You should spread the word on what an awful school and awful teacher is out there. Shame her like she shames little kids.

It's tempting, but I don't want to say.

Is it BE?....

Op here. I'm assuming those are initials of a school or teacher and it doesn't match either in my daughter's school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teacher here. I'm really sorry that happened. She should know to say that it's an emergency if it is, though, especially if the schools policy is twice a day. I am a middle school teacher so it's a bit different, and sometimes students claim "emergency" when it's not. A teacher may say not right now and not know it's an emergency. I agree with the walking out if it's a true emergency.

I will never forget when I was in second grade and a classmate was denied going to the bathroom. She was wearing a dress and stockings, made a big triangle by spreading her legs and just peed all over the floor.

OP - tell your kid to pee on the teacher's floor if she won't let her go.

I knew this badass girl in HS. Senior year she stood up and peed her pants while staring at this asshole teacher that never ever let anyone go to the bathroom.

It was especially sweet for me because this same teacher didn't let me go to the nurse when I got a surprise the day after I *thought* my period stopped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did I miss the part where the kid pooped her pants? Actually pooped? If your kid feels poop coming out, and doesn't ring the emergency bell, I dare say her mother needs to teach her not to be treated like a doormat. And if it is the more ghastly and emergent diarrhea then why is she in school if she's sick? Either way that's a parental fail.

This is about preparing your child in advance. Teach your child what to do to advocate for themselves in your absence. Give them life skills. Kindergarten and first grade is not too young. There is an "emergency" out for this very reason. Teach them not to wait until the last minute (this you can practice endlessly at home) and teach them to tell the teacher they are about to have an accident.

You missed the part where the elementary aged child peed her pants after having an authority figure tell her no twice.

But I didnt. There's an emergency out. Kid didn't use it. Parent fail. Teach your kids to stand up for themselves!

Requiring a kid to use a special word to be allowed to use them bathroom when they have asked twice is a dick move. Complete and total teacher fail.

Totally agree. Which is why if you don't prepare your kid to deal with it then it' crosses over to a parent fail. There are aholes in all walks of life. Even elementary school. Our job as parents is to give them the confidence to stand up to adults in certain situations and this is clearly one. Op said this happened once already. That's the point where to put it more "sensitively", the opportunity was missed. that was the teachable moment. Because there are loser jerk teachers and bosses all throughout life. Mommy can't always defend you or get you a new nice teacher. You gotta deal. You need skills. You need a plan. That's the parents job and why no, it isn't a complete and total teacher fail.

You sound like you THINK you know a whole lot about something that you actually know NOTHING about!

I know nothing about peeing? Holding it? Being 9? Being in school? Standing up for myself? Parenting?
Just because I see it differently than you doesn't mean I know nothing. My perspective is different. I don't think the teacher was right. I do not blame the child. It doesn't change the reality. The teacher doesn't interrupt class for bathroom breaks. She rolled her eyes after op yelled at her. The teacher is wrong. But whatever. The kid still peed her pants. For the second time in elementary school and she's NINE!! I feel sorry for her. Good luck to you!

You know nothing about the situation as it occurred. Was the class doing desk work or was the teacher teaching? You don't know, because you weren't there. That's just one example of what you don't know about. You are hysterical about something that has nothing to do with you (unless your my daughter's teacher, which I doubt you are) and you don't seem like a reasonable person. You can continue to read and respond on this thread all you want, but I'm going to ignore you. -OP