Aftercare is cruel to kindergarteners

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"True, but - AND GET THIS OP - some of us women also work because we want to, because we are smart, educated and accomplished and have no desire to stay at home all day watching The Chew and filing our nails until the kids get home from school. My son has an intelligent, independent woman as a mother and I am proud that I can be a great role model for him so that he will grow up to be a man who respects women for ALL that they can do, not just as some domestic caretaker for him and his children. So judge me all you want. . .I am judging you because you obviously have nothing better to do with your day than sit on your ass posting drivel like this. Why don't you go out and do something your kids can be proud of while they are at school?"

This is really a shame because you are suggesting that childcare and domestic work is somehow not as valid or significant as other work, and that is not the case.

So why are you defending yourself on DCUM when you are working? Oh, because you are smart, educated, and accomplished.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^Plus, please tell me how hard it is to raise your kids while THEY ARE AT SCHOOL ALL DAY. What, exactly, ARE you doing between 8-3?

I want you stay at home moms to answer this.

I'm taking care of my mom. She's in the end stages of a cancer battle, and is living with us. If I saw you at my kids' school or the playground, I wouldn't mention it. I cry when I do talk about it.

I left a decent job to do this. I was not a SAHM during the heavy-lifting childcare years. But having been in both worlds in recent months, I can tell you I find slackers and overachievers in both groups. I wouldn't denigrate either WOHM or SAHM, as an entire group. Plenty of good and bad in either group. I also don't presume to know what is going on behind closed doors in other people's marriages and lives.

I'm lucky my friends live and let live, and don't waste a beautiful day online tearing strangers apart. This thread has just been a pathetic display of women being their own worst enemies. Please stop, and enjoy your families and the people around you. Tearing each other down is no way to create a community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been covered before. Some folks have to work full time and don't really have a choice. .

Sure they do. Downsize, downsize, downsize. You don't need to live in a 3,000 sq ft place, hire help for cleaning and yardwork, wear the best clothes, have an iPhone5, drive an SUV with only one or two kids, use coupons and shop the specials. Cook more, go out to eat once a month or less.

It can easily be done, even in this area. But people here are too set on keeping up their extravagant lifestyles.

Priorities.

Yes, you can live out of your car and see your kids all the time. You need to stop this behavior. I have numerous friends whose children did aftercare in Kindergarten and were fine. Please stop judging people for their decisions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^Plus, please tell me how hard it is to raise your kids while THEY ARE AT SCHOOL ALL DAY. What, exactly, ARE you doing between 8-3?

I want you stay at home moms to answer this.

Right now I am looking for a job. I am a SAHM and am bored out of my mind at the thought of my kids in school all day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eye roll back atcha, babe.

Do you see the irony of, on the one hand, insisting that your way is best while at the same time mocking me for what you assume is the same thing?

You're just a judgmental cunt. Accept it and move on.

Are you the one with the 4yo that goes to bed at 8pm?

Yes, I am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^Plus, please tell me how hard it is to raise your kids while THEY ARE AT SCHOOL ALL DAY. What, exactly, ARE you doing between 8-3?

I want you stay at home moms to answer this.

Right now I am looking for a job. I am a SAHM and am bored out of my mind at the thought of my kids in school all day.

Well, thank you for admitting that being a SAHM when your kids are school aged is, in fact, not the utterly exhausting job that so many self-righteous women on here want to claim it is. Finally, some honesty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"True, but - AND GET THIS OP - some of us women also work because we want to, because we are smart, educated and accomplished and have no desire to stay at home all day watching The Chew and filing our nails until the kids get home from school. My son has an intelligent, independent woman as a mother and I am proud that I can be a great role model for him so that he will grow up to be a man who respects women for ALL that they can do, not just as some domestic caretaker for him and his children. So judge me all you want. . .I am judging you because you obviously have nothing better to do with your day than sit on your ass posting drivel like this. Why don't you go out and do something your kids can be proud of while they are at school?"

This is really a shame because you are suggesting that childcare and domestic work is somehow not as valid or significant as other work, and that is not the case.

So why are you defending yourself on DCUM when you are working? Oh, because you are smart, educated, and accomplished.

Because we are slow during the summer. Most of my clients and my co-workers are on vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am not sure i buy the argument (for most 2-parent families, at least) that people "have no choice" but to put their kids in aftercare or else their kids would be unfed, unclothed, etc. unless you are a really, really high earner, quality aftercare programs for 2 or more kids is going to eat up almost all of your salary. So you aren't really making a ton of profit anyway. Plus, your kids would prefer to be with you. Stay home if you can.

Um, no. But thanks for the unsolicited advice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been covered before. Some folks have to work full time and don't really have a choice. .

Sure they do. Downsize, downsize, downsize. You don't need to live in a 3,000 sq ft place, hire help for cleaning and yardwork, wear the best clothes, have an iPhone5, drive an SUV with only one or two kids, use coupons and shop the specials. Cook more, go out to eat once a month or less.

It can easily be done, even in this area. But people here are too set on keeping up their extravagant lifestyles.

Priorities.

I agree, most people DO have a choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"True, but - AND GET THIS OP - some of us women also work because we want to, because we are smart, educated and accomplished and have no desire to stay at home all day watching The Chew and filing our nails until the kids get home from school. My son has an intelligent, independent woman as a mother and I am proud that I can be a great role model for him so that he will grow up to be a man who respects women for ALL that they can do, not just as some domestic caretaker for him and his children. So judge me all you want. . .I am judging you because you obviously have nothing better to do with your day than sit on your ass posting drivel like this. Why don't you go out and do something your kids can be proud of while they are at school?"

This is really a shame because you are suggesting that childcare and domestic work is somehow not as valid or significant as other work, and that is not the case.

So why are you defending yourself on DCUM when you are working? Oh, because you are smart, educated, and accomplished.

Because we are slow during the summer. Most of my clients and my co-workers are on vacation.

Same here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"True, but - AND GET THIS OP - some of us women also work because we want to, because we are smart, educated and accomplished and have no desire to stay at home all day watching The Chew and filing our nails until the kids get home from school. My son has an intelligent, independent woman as a mother and I am proud that I can be a great role model for him so that he will grow up to be a man who respects women for ALL that they can do, not just as some domestic caretaker for him and his children. So judge me all you want. . .I am judging you because you obviously have nothing better to do with your day than sit on your ass posting drivel like this. Why don't you go out and do something your kids can be proud of while they are at school?"

This is really a shame because you are suggesting that childcare and domestic work is somehow not as valid or significant as other work, and that is not the case.

No, when your kids are at school, you cannot suggest to me that it is such exhausting work to be home all day. You just can't. I work full time and manage to have a clean house, a stocked pantry/fridge, a tidy yard, clean laundry, etc. I'm not saying the work isn't valid, I'm just saying you can't tell me that having 7 hours to yourself 5 days a week while your kids are at school is somehow hard work. Birth to 5? Sure. But after that, you're lying and there's no way I believe you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been covered before. Some folks have to work full time and don't really have a choice. .

Sure they do. Downsize, downsize, downsize. You don't need to live in a 3,000 sq ft place, hire help for cleaning and yardwork, wear the best clothes, have an iPhone5, drive an SUV with only one or two kids, use coupons and shop the specials. Cook more, go out to eat once a month or less.

It can easily be done, even in this area. But people here are too set on keeping up their extravagant lifestyles.

Priorities.

Um, I think there are a lot of women who don't live extravagant lifestyles, certainly not a 3,000 sq ft house! And they still need two incomes to afford their modest lifestyles. And of course, there are single mothers. No amount of downsizing is going to mean a single mother doesn't have to work (unless she wins the lottery or suddenly inherits a fortune from a mysterious wealthy relative).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been covered before. Some folks have to work full time and don't really have a choice. .

Sure they do. Downsize, downsize, downsize. You don't need to live in a 3,000 sq ft place, hire help for cleaning and yardwork, wear the best clothes, have an iPhone5, drive an SUV with only one or two kids, use coupons and shop the specials. Cook more, go out to eat once a month or less.

It can easily be done, even in this area. But people here are too set on keeping up their extravagant lifestyles.

Priorities.

I agree, most people DO have a choice.

Your opinion is not fact. It is YOUR opinion, and really, why should anyone else care?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"True, but - AND GET THIS OP - some of us women also work because we want to, because we are smart, educated and accomplished and have no desire to stay at home all day watching The Chew and filing our nails until the kids get home from school. My son has an intelligent, independent woman as a mother and I am proud that I can be a great role model for him so that he will grow up to be a man who respects women for ALL that they can do, not just as some domestic caretaker for him and his children. So judge me all you want. . .I am judging you because you obviously have nothing better to do with your day than sit on your ass posting drivel like this. Why don't you go out and do something your kids can be proud of while they are at school?"

This is really a shame because you are suggesting that childcare and domestic work is somehow not as valid or significant as other work, and that is not the case.

No, when your kids are at school, you cannot suggest to me that it is such exhausting work to be home all day. You just can't. I work full time and manage to have a clean house, a stocked pantry/fridge, a tidy yard, clean laundry, etc. I'm not saying the work isn't valid, I'm just saying you can't tell me that having 7 hours to yourself 5 days a week while your kids are at school is somehow hard work. Birth to 5? Sure. But after that, you're lying and there's no way I believe you.

+1

[Anonymous]

I pick my child up promptly to spend all that quality time together and my child is envious of the kids who stay in aftercare and get to play with their friends longer....go figure. Every family is unique.