Families would rather have daughters than sons

[Anonymous]

I never wanted one of each. My ideal was two of the same gender close in age. I had no preference on the gender. I ended up with two DDs, two years apart. It’s been wonderful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted boys. I subconsciously beloved that boys were just better, easier, and more desirable.

I was stressed about raising a girl in this anti-woman world. But it has been amazing and I’m so lucky to have her.

Are we living in the same place and time?

--born in the mid 60s and find it's SO MUCH better now for women

It's better now of course, but still not ideal and things have gotten worse in the past few years. Women deal with a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys more likely to violent, commit crimes, end up in prison, be autistic or ADHD, lower executive function than girls, and more severe mental illnesses.

People can only afford one kid. 9 out of 10 moms would prefer it to be a girl. Moms of boys have little time for female-focused activities and self care. Moms of girls do all those things with their daughters. It’s a totally different child raising experience.

I never did female focused activities and self care with my mother. Do you even have kids?

We have two young boys. The boy moms all end up finding each other because it’s just simply insane. I don’t know one boy mom who isn’t frazzled.

Maybe it gets better when the boys are age 10+?

I have boys 15 and 12. I was exhausted when they were little but they’re so amazing now. I wanted to have girls originally, but you get what you get.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/416809/sexism-girl-preference-sex-ratios-discrimination-ivf

Interesting piece. Have seen this pop up now and then.

Speaking to younger families/couples anecdotally I find this to be true also.

Thoughts?

Pre-Islam, in Arab and Asia, people used to bury baby girls. Islam taught them that daughters are blessings, should he cared for kindly and given rights to inheritance, divorce, child support etc. Obviously, culture didn't completely go away but made things much better. Prophet had five daughters who he raised with love and respect and they adored him. That was not the norm in that society.

[Anonymous]

Personally, my parents loved me and gave priority over my brothers. We wanted a daughter and adore her.

[Anonymous]

To be fair, most daughters are more fun, easy to raise and care more about their parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be fair, most daughters are more fun, easy to raise and care more about their parents.

More fun? I don’t think that has anything to do with the gender of your child. Neither does caring about your parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be fair, most daughters are more fun, easy to raise and care more about their parents.

Have you met my sister, to be fair?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys more likely to violent, commit crimes, end up in prison, be autistic or ADHD, lower executive function than girls, and more severe mental illnesses.

People can only afford one kid. 9 out of 10 moms would prefer it to be a girl. Moms of boys have little time for female-focused activities and self care. Moms of girls do all those things with their daughters. It’s a totally different child raising experience.

I never did female focused activities and self care with my mother. Do you even have kids?

We have two young boys. The boy moms all end up finding each other because it’s just simply insane. I don’t know one boy mom who isn’t frazzled.

Maybe it gets better when the boys are age 10+?

Haha, have you seen the IG reels and short videos where the mom of teenage boys goes to visit the mom of teenage girls? The teen boy mom is relaxed, and the teen girl mom is stressed, complains about her girls being mean and stealing her shoes and makeup, and says that they have a lot of relationship drama.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys more likely to violent, commit crimes, end up in prison, be autistic or ADHD, lower executive function than girls, and more severe mental illnesses.

People can only afford one kid. 9 out of 10 moms would prefer it to be a girl. Moms of boys have little time for female-focused activities and self care. Moms of girls do all those things with their daughters. It’s a totally different child raising experience.

I never did female focused activities and self care with my mother. Do you even have kids?

We have two young boys. The boy moms all end up finding each other because it’s just simply insane. I don’t know one boy mom who isn’t frazzled.

Maybe it gets better when the boys are age 10+?

Haha, have you seen the IG reels and short videos where the mom of teenage boys goes to visit the mom of teenage girls? The teen boy mom is relaxed, and the teen girl mom is stressed, complains about her girls being mean and stealing her shoes and makeup, and says that they have a lot of relationship drama.

I really, really loathe these dumb stereotypes about both boys and girls. I have one of each.

My teen daughter has never been into “female-oriented” activities, and neither have I for that matter. She is not mean to me, there is no drama whatsoever at home or with her friends or boyfriend.

My teen son was very calm and well-behaved in early childhood, always carrying a book around. He’s a great cook and I feel pretty sure that if either of my kids ever invite us for Thanksgiving dinner, it will be him.

People are different. Love the kid you have and give them space to develop into whole people without the internet or pop culture telling them how they should act.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted boys. I subconsciously beloved that boys were just better, easier, and more desirable.

I was stressed about raising a girl in this anti-woman world. But it has been amazing and I’m so lucky to have her.

DP. What planet are you living on? There is no time in history when women have had more going for them than now.

I am a single mom, make 160k at a job I love, dress how I want, do (or not do) my hair as I wish, own a house, have significant savings, sending both my kids to college.
Tell me what other times in history when many women could do that. And it’s even better for my daughter because she is not growing up in a family where most of the resources and attention went to the boys. I have a son too. They are both great kids and going to do well.

It is true that girls and women growing up in rural/red areas have fewer options, but the boys and men in those places are affected as well.

I guess if you already think this world is anti-woman, you are going to see everything that way. If you are a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys more likely to violent, commit crimes, end up in prison, be autistic or ADHD, lower executive function than girls, and more severe mental illnesses.

People can only afford one kid. 9 out of 10 moms would prefer it to be a girl. Moms of boys have little time for female-focused activities and self care. Moms of girls do all those things with their daughters. It’s a totally different child raising experience.

I never did female focused activities and self care with my mother. Do you even have kids?

We have two young boys. The boy moms all end up finding each other because it’s just simply insane. I don’t know one boy mom who isn’t frazzled.

Maybe it gets better when the boys are age 10+?

Haha, have you seen the IG reels and short videos where the mom of teenage boys goes to visit the mom of teenage girls? The teen boy mom is relaxed, and the teen girl mom is stressed, complains about her girls being mean and stealing her shoes and makeup, and says that they have a lot of relationship drama.

I really, really loathe these dumb stereotypes about both boys and girls. I have one of each.

My teen daughter has never been into “female-oriented” activities, and neither have I for that matter. She is not mean to me, there is no drama whatsoever at home or with her friends or boyfriend.

My teen son was very calm and well-behaved in early childhood, always carrying a book around. He’s a great cook and I feel pretty sure that if either of my kids ever invite us for Thanksgiving dinner, it will be him.

People are different. Love the kid you have and give them space to develop into whole people without the internet or pop culture telling them how they should act.

+1 Accept your kids as they are regardless of gender, dont foist society's expectations or preconceived notions of how they should be or what you want them to be. A child can be difficult or easy or come with parenting challenges and some of it could be tied to biological imperatives coming from gender. But as parents all we can do is be there for them and raise them to be good human beings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys more likely to violent, commit crimes, end up in prison, be autistic or ADHD, lower executive function than girls, and more severe mental illnesses.

People can only afford one kid. 9 out of 10 moms would prefer it to be a girl. Moms of boys have little time for female-focused activities and self care. Moms of girls do all those things with their daughters. It’s a totally different child raising experience.

I never did female focused activities and self care with my mother. Do you even have kids?

We have two young boys. The boy moms all end up finding each other because it’s just simply insane. I don’t know one boy mom who isn’t frazzled.

Maybe it gets better when the boys are age 10+?

Haha, have you seen the IG reels and short videos where the mom of teenage boys goes to visit the mom of teenage girls? The teen boy mom is relaxed, and the teen girl mom is stressed, complains about her girls being mean and stealing her shoes and makeup, and says that they have a lot of relationship drama.

I really, really loathe these dumb stereotypes about both boys and girls. I have one of each.

My teen daughter has never been into “female-oriented” activities, and neither have I for that matter. She is not mean to me, there is no drama whatsoever at home or with her friends or boyfriend.

My teen son was very calm and well-behaved in early childhood, always carrying a book around. He’s a great cook and I feel pretty sure that if either of my kids ever invite us for Thanksgiving dinner, it will be him.

People are different. Love the kid you have and give them space to develop into whole people without the internet or pop culture telling them how they should act.

+1 Accept your kids as they are regardless of gender, dont foist society's expectations or preconceived notions of how they should be or what you want them to be. A child can be difficult or easy or come with parenting challenges and some of it could be tied to biological imperatives coming from gender. But as parents all we can do is be there for them and raise them to be good human beings.

Best response on this thread.

[Anonymous]

As the parent of two boys I would rather a dozen male children than 1 female child. Girls are so dramatic. A girly girl would be my worst nightmare. Maybe, just maybe, I could handle a tomboy, or a lesbian athlete daughter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/416809/sexism-girl-preference-sex-ratios-discrimination-ivf

Interesting piece. Have seen this pop up now and then.

Speaking to younger families/couples anecdotally I find this to be true also.

Thoughts?

Pre-Islam, in Arab and Asia, people used to bury baby girls. Islam taught them that daughters are blessings, should he cared for kindly and given rights to inheritance, divorce, child support etc. Obviously, culture didn't completely go away but made things much better. Prophet had five daughters who he raised with love and respect and they adored him. That was not the norm in that society.

Certainly, but it’s important to point out that it’s a husband’s right and duty to chastise his wife and children when necessary. This cannot be considered wrong for the husband to do simply by categorizing it as “corporal punishment.” That’s a westernized construct.

The UAE United Arab Emirates Federal Supreme Court recently considered a lower court's ruling, and upheld a husband's right to chastise the wife(s) and children physically. See Article 53 of the United Arab Emirates' legal code.

Most majority countries are this way.