Is frugality in a high-earning woman a green flag or a red flag?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This person sounds cheap and no fun.

This.
No tipping is horrible, all the rest is just being needlessly cheap. As for the dress being too expensive at $200, what kind of law firm employs her, the ambulance chasers? Most reputable firms want their employees to look presentable, and you can't show up at work in a dress from Walmart.

Who really cares about what you wear as long as it's clean? This isn't a fashion show. If you choose your lawyers based on the designer clothes they have on, then you're a pretty shallow person. I don't mind how people dress as long as they look clean.

Then you know nothing about the sales of high end services, such as with law firms. In most contexts, the standards for appearance are going to exceed "clean."

[Anonymous]

Green Flag. As long as she is good looking and not a lib. I bet she is wild in the sack. Very rare / nonexistent, especially in the DMV area.

[Anonymous]

My friend married a guy like this. Controlling loser. He jimmied the thermostat so she couldn’t raise the heat beyond 58 in upstate NY in the winter. This dude would also complain about the service everywhere he went. He was never happy with anything. Thank goodness she divorced him.

[Anonymous]

Is she hot?

[Anonymous]

All ok except you have to tip in restaurants if you chose to eat there.

No donations is a flag unless there’s big debt and maybe supporting family or other.

Occasional spending on some kind of event you like may make a happier person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m talking about someone who is a lawyer and makes very good money, but:

* never tips or donates
* almost never eats out, and if she does it’s always the cheapest place or the cheapest thing on the menu
* avoids things like concerts, sporting events, festivals, shows, spas, etc. because she it’s as a waste of money
* doesn’t spend money on entertainment, events, gifts, Ubers, clothes, etc.
* hates paying for convenience (delivery fees, checked bags, valet, subscriptions, etc.)
* travels a few times a year but always very cheaply (budget airlines/basic hotels/red-eyes/points deals)
* researches everything and buys the cheapest/highest-quality version of literally everything from toothpaste to furniture
* can’t fathom spending $200 on a dress or $2000 on coat

Would men see this as financially responsible and disciplined, or as overly cheap/miserly? Especially in dating, does this kind of mindset help or hurt?

Provided she's otherwise kind and beautiful, the only thing that would bother me is the not tipping. Treating people poorly in the service world - whether restaurants or retail or whatever - is an immediate out. Don't care for such people. The entitlement, the casual cruelty, etc... no thanks. But otherwise have no problem with being cheap as long as they have joy and happiness in their lives and aren't stewing in misery and denial.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m talking about someone who is a lawyer and makes very good money, but:

* never tips or donates
* almost never eats out, and if she does it’s always the cheapest place or the cheapest thing on the menu
* avoids things like concerts, sporting events, festivals, shows, spas, etc. because she it’s as a waste of money
* doesn’t spend money on entertainment, events, gifts, Ubers, clothes, etc.
* hates paying for convenience (delivery fees, checked bags, valet, subscriptions, etc.)
* travels a few times a year but always very cheaply (budget airlines/basic hotels/red-eyes/points deals)
* researches everything and buys the cheapest/highest-quality version of literally everything from toothpaste to furniture
* can’t fathom spending $200 on a dress or $2000 on coat

Would men see this as financially responsible and disciplined, or as overly cheap/miserly? Especially in dating, does this kind of mindset help or hurt?

Provided she's otherwise kind and beautiful, the only thing that would bother me is the not tipping. Treating people poorly in the service world - whether restaurants or retail or whatever - is an immediate out. Don't care for such people. The entitlement, the casual cruelty, etc... no thanks. But otherwise have no problem with being cheap as long as they have joy and happiness in their lives and aren't stewing in misery and denial.

Pretty easy to imagine this person stewing in misery and denial though.

[Anonymous]

So funny how many men are chiming in that a woman who is both low-maintenance and hot is their dream woman.

Those 2 things cannot exist together. Being hot takes money and effort. What exactly do you think Sydney Sweeney would look like without the makeup, hair extensions, and boob job?

Also telling that all you care about is looks and that someone doesn't bother or inconvenience you. What you want is a cat, not a woman.

That's like women insisting men be both wealthy and not work much. The two cannot co-exist, except in extremely rare cases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So funny how many men are chiming in that a woman who is both low-maintenance and hot is their dream woman.

Those 2 things cannot exist together. Being hot takes money and effort. What exactly do you think Sydney Sweeney would look like without the makeup, hair extensions, and boob job?

Also telling that all you care about is looks and that someone doesn't bother or inconvenience you. What you want is a cat, not a woman.

That's like women insisting men be both wealthy and not work much. The two cannot co-exist, except in extremely rare cases.

Yep ... they all want a woman who is a 10 who they won't ever have to buy a gift for or take out to dinner anywhere but Chipotle. It's hilarious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As long as she is not MAGA.
And she is hot, well educated, high earner, frugal, does not suffer wasteful fools gladly and is not materialistic herself… she is prime WIFEY material.

All shades of Green Flag. She is the entire golf course. No no, she is the entire Amazon jungle!!!

These are contradictory. Being hot as a woman means investing heavily into your appearance. Gym memberships, healthy food, cosmetics, hair, clothes, etc all cost money.

Some women are naturally hot without all of this. There are many poor women very hot and beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So funny how many men are chiming in that a woman who is both low-maintenance and hot is their dream woman.

Those 2 things cannot exist together. Being hot takes money and effort. What exactly do you think Sydney Sweeney would look like without the makeup, hair extensions, and boob job?

Also telling that all you care about is looks and that someone doesn't bother or inconvenience you. What you want is a cat, not a woman.

That's like women insisting men be both wealthy and not work much. The two cannot co-exist, except in extremely rare cases.

You can look beautiful naturally. Nice face, natural boobs, don’t need to work out to be in shape, don’t need makeup or nails.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Total green flag for most men. Indicates low maintenance woman who doesn't see a man as a cash register. Very few nice-looking women like this exist.

That’s because, in general, “nice-looking” equals thousands, if not tens of thousands, of dollars a year of investment in their appearance. (Skincare, facials, gym memberships, cosmetics, hair coloring, haircuts, massages and similar to keep stress low which improves looks, teeth bleaching/veneers, clothes, shoes, waxing, threading, etc etc.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Total green flag for most men. Indicates low maintenance woman who doesn't see a man as a cash register. Very few nice-looking women like this exist.

100%. That’s the type of woman you should marry and build generational wealth with. Unfortunately, most women are too materialistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So funny how many men are chiming in that a woman who is both low-maintenance and hot is their dream woman.

Those 2 things cannot exist together. Being hot takes money and effort. What exactly do you think Sydney Sweeney would look like without the makeup, hair extensions, and boob job?

Also telling that all you care about is looks and that someone doesn't bother or inconvenience you. What you want is a cat, not a woman.

That's like women insisting men be both wealthy and not work much. The two cannot co-exist, except in extremely rare cases.

You can look beautiful naturally. Nice face, natural boobs, don’t need to work out to be in shape, don’t need makeup or nails.

Fake news.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m talking about someone who is a lawyer and makes very good money, but:

* never tips or donates
* almost never eats out, and if she does it’s always the cheapest place or the cheapest thing on the menu
* avoids things like concerts, sporting events, festivals, shows, spas, etc. because she it’s as a waste of money
* doesn’t spend money on entertainment, events, gifts, Ubers, clothes, etc.
* hates paying for convenience (delivery fees, checked bags, valet, subscriptions, etc.)
* travels a few times a year but always very cheaply (budget airlines/basic hotels/red-eyes/points deals)
* researches everything and buys the cheapest/highest-quality version of literally everything from toothpaste to furniture
* can’t fathom spending $200 on a dress or $2000 on coat

Would men see this as financially responsible and disciplined, or as overly cheap/miserly? Especially in dating, does this kind of mindset help or hurt?

Provided she's otherwise kind and beautiful, the only thing that would bother me is the not tipping. Treating people poorly in the service world - whether restaurants or retail or whatever - is an immediate out. Don't care for such people. The entitlement, the casual cruelty, etc... no thanks. But otherwise have no problem with being cheap as long as they have joy and happiness in their lives and aren't stewing in misery and denial.

She cannot be kind if she doesn’t tip. Some of you are purposely clueless.