DS, 19, hasn't had a GF and now says he's asexual

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is social, smart, good looking, cool and hip and generally gets along very well in life. He's never had a girlfriend, though he has many female friends who flirt with him. As he's gotten older I get the sense he might be on the spectrum, because he's become very rigid in his thinking. When we ask him why he doesn't date, he says he doesn't see the point, that it seems like too much effort for something he doesn't really care about. He doesn't even hook up at parties, and recently he told us that he thinks he's asexual. (And no, he's not gay, we've talked about that too.) Is this common or is it another phase that boys go through? DH and I are both very surprised.

It's another less derogatory word for incel.
He probably finds most younger girls too toxic due to social media influence, feminism, etc.
He might try dating older women for awhile, 30-40s to get some dating experience.

Agree: classic incel .

If you haven’t yet, everyone needs to watch “Adolescence” on Netflix. It’s how teen boys are today.

Do you have a teen boy? Know any teen boys? I know plenty of teen boys who are nothing like that. FFS.

+1 A friend told me I "had" to watch it. I was like, yeah, disturbed kid. That is NOT a universal boy type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:FFS, did you even watch Adolescence ?!?

FFS, it's a movie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is social, smart, good looking, cool and hip and generally gets along very well in life. He's never had a girlfriend, though he has many female friends who flirt with him. As he's gotten older I get the sense he might be on the spectrum, because he's become very rigid in his thinking. When we ask him why he doesn't date, he says he doesn't see the point, that it seems like too much effort for something he doesn't really care about. He doesn't even hook up at parties, and recently he told us that he thinks he's asexual. (And no, he's not gay, we've talked about that too.) Is this common or is it another phase that boys go through? DH and I are both very surprised.

It's another less derogatory word for incel.
He probably finds most younger girls too toxic due to social media influence, feminism, etc.
He might try dating older women for awhile, 30-40s to get some dating experience.

Agree: classic incel .

If you haven’t yet, everyone needs to watch “Adolescence” on Netflix. It’s how teen boys are today.

You are both gross. He's only 19; not unusual to be novice to the dating scene. Not every crowd is "fast" in high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FFS, did you even watch Adolescence ?!?

FFS, it's a movie.

Not at all, it is far far more than that. In fact, it’s been made a part of the public school curriculum for schools, in the uk. And furthermore, it’s a series, not a movie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like he is a late bloomer OP. If you pressure him on this, he may double down on being asexual and never experiment further.

Let him do his own thing on his own time. My DH and I never had sex with anyone else until we met- I was 29 and he was 31.

19 is right in the middle of bloomers -- it is in the range of the average age, so not a late bloomer yet.