Best friend divorcing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time supporting a friend who is so incredibly selfish.

Joke will be on her. The DH is wealthy and will have no problem attracting a much younger woman if he wants.

She will be wealthy if she leaves, and clearly doesn't care what her DH does after she leaves.

How is "he will find someone else!" a reason to stay?! You guys are f***ing crazy.

OP here and agree, she doesn't care what he does, so this is a nonissue.
As to people saying I am not a good friend - I am supporting her 100% and at a loss so turning to an anonymous site for advice, I am not going to her husband, I am TRYING, spending time researching how to help her and listening to strangers yell at me. Feels like I am a decent friend actually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time supporting a friend who is so incredibly selfish.

Joke will be on her. The DH is wealthy and will have no problem attracting a much younger woman if he wants.

She will be wealthy if she leaves, and clearly doesn't care what her DH does after she leaves.

How is "he will find someone else!" a reason to stay?! You guys are f***ing crazy.

She should do him a favor and leave. Her gold digging was successful. Maybe next time he’ll find a woman who actually loves him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time supporting a friend who is so incredibly selfish.

Joke will be on her. The DH is wealthy and will have no problem attracting a much younger woman if he wants.

She will be wealthy if she leaves, and clearly doesn't care what her DH does after she leaves.

How is "he will find someone else!" a reason to stay?! You guys are f***ing crazy.

She should do him a favor and leave. Her gold digging was successful. Maybe next time he’ll find a woman who actually loves him.

AGAIN, she married them when they were both POOR. She had no idea it would work out this way financially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here . . .I think she had some doubts going into the marriage but she didn’t trust herself to know what love was supposed to feel like. She loved her DH like a friend, but that was it, but she didn’t know better.

She was immature when she got married and I suspect she's immature now. She doesn't know what she wants other than not to come second to the job. I get the last part, but why change now?

Maybe because she’s not dead yet and still wants to live some of her life the way SHE wants? Jfc there’s a lot of people telling a very unhappy person to stay with the person making them unhappy. I don’t get it. We get one life. If she’s sick of being treated like an indentured servant she should take her half and go live her life.

Oh please. She chose to marry someone she wasn't in love with and then have kids with him. This life isn't a surprise to her, she's just regretting her own choices. So she should completely disrupt her kids lives because "My b! I should have married for LOVE. I only have one life to live!!!!".

The most "in-love" adults I've ever seen were in a 2nd marriage. They were nearly teenager-esque. Right down to walking with hands in each others' back pockets. (They met a year or two after their respective divorces.)

Their blended family was a total nightmare. Marriage lasted only about 2 years. Relationship maybe 3.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thank you all for the advice. Her DH is not at all abusive and I think she had some doubts going into the marriage but she didn’t trust herself to know what love was supposed to feel like. She loved her DH like a friend, but that was it, but she didn’t know better. And no affair, I don’t think she would cross that line, but I do feel like she’s felt connections when chatting with people which maybe opened up to her the idea that love should feel different than it does.

Connections = attention + hormones

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time supporting a friend who is so incredibly selfish.

Joke will be on her. The DH is wealthy and will have no problem attracting a much younger woman if he wants.

She will be wealthy if she leaves, and clearly doesn't care what her DH does after she leaves.

How is "he will find someone else!" a reason to stay?! You guys are f***ing crazy.

OP here and agree, she doesn't care what he does, so this is a nonissue.
As to people saying I am not a good friend - I am supporting her 100% and at a loss so turning to an anonymous site for advice, I am not going to her husband, I am TRYING, spending time researching how to help her and listening to strangers yell at me. Feels like I am a decent friend actually.

Stop "trying". You have gotten plenty of feedback here. You don't need anymore research. The consensus here is that you have two options. Pick either one, and you will know peace:

1. Stay out of it and comfort her with no opinions.
2. Tell her to knock it off and stay put.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time supporting a friend who is so incredibly selfish.

Joke will be on her. The DH is wealthy and will have no problem attracting a much younger woman if he wants.

She will be wealthy if she leaves, and clearly doesn't care what her DH does after she leaves.

How is "he will find someone else!" a reason to stay?! You guys are f***ing crazy.

She should do him a favor and leave. Her gold digging was successful. Maybe next time he’ll find a woman who actually loves him.

AGAIN, she married them when they were both POOR. She had no idea it would work out this way financially.

You are weirdly invested in making your " friend" seem like a victim.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have a hard time supporting a friend who is so incredibly selfish.

Joke will be on her. The DH is wealthy and will have no problem attracting a much younger woman if he wants.

She will be wealthy if she leaves, and clearly doesn't care what her DH does after she leaves.

How is "he will find someone else!" a reason to stay?! You guys are f***ing crazy.

She should do him a favor and leave. Her gold digging was successful. Maybe next time he’ll find a woman who actually loves him.

Yeah. I actually feel bad for the guy