Best friend divorcing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree she may be depressed. She has lots of money to address quality of life issues.

Many people never fall in love like you see in the movies and a lot of that is hormonal and fades anyway. I think she's a bit old/the marriage is so long-term that it's not wise to divorce unless she really wants to date or otherwise really shake things up.

This divorce will affect grandparenting. That may be quite saddening.

This is ridiculous. No guarantee they will have grandkids. I don't think grandparenting together is even a thing. It was not when I was a kid. I had distinct relationships with each grandparent... and I am almost 50.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree she may be depressed. She has lots of money to address quality of life issues.

Many people never fall in love like you see in the movies and a lot of that is hormonal and fades anyway. I think she's a bit old/the marriage is so long-term that it's not wise to divorce unless she really wants to date or otherwise really shake things up.

This divorce will affect grandparenting. That may be quite saddening.

This should be literally the last thing on her mind when divorcing

+1. Ridiculous and irrelevant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stay out of it. Not your business. She will do well financially. He won't be able to "make her life difficult." She has a reason to go to court. They have money. And he knows it. She will get 50/50 of martial assets.

The only thing I would tell her is this: do not count on meeting someone else. That is not a reason to divorce. If she would rather be single permanently vs. stay in a situation that makes her sad, then she should divorce. But have eyes wide open that "love" is not likely to be found. That ship has sailed.

If he's crazy, he absolutely can. Look at how Elon kidnaps his favorite kid for weeks on end, in despite of custody agreements, such that Grimes needs to go on social media to try to get her son back. Plenty of moneyed spouses throw money at frivolous disputes to annoy and grind down the other one. Look at Brangelina's divorce and how long it took.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:... but you don't want to help her.

You want to rat her out to the potentially abusive partner she wants to leave. You insult her intelligence and clearly care more about her financial status than her mental health.

With friends like these...

OP here. I have no words for you. Find a different thread to bully please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree she may be depressed. She has lots of money to address quality of life issues.

Many people never fall in love like you see in the movies and a lot of that is hormonal and fades anyway. I think she's a bit old/the marriage is so long-term that it's not wise to divorce unless she really wants to date or otherwise really shake things up.

This divorce will affect grandparenting. That may be quite saddening.

This should be literally the last thing on her mind when divorcing

Oh really? You don't think it affects other family members? Somebody who stayed married maybe 30 years longer than they needed to for the kids, throwing in the towel?

It doesn't sound like an abusive or toxic marriage and these people are not far from retirement at C-Suite levels.

Split holidays, acrimony between adult kids, new partners, all sorts of stuff can flow from this decision.

[Anonymous]

MYOB. She needs to contact an attorney.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree she may be depressed. She has lots of money to address quality of life issues.

Many people never fall in love like you see in the movies and a lot of that is hormonal and fades anyway. I think she's a bit old/the marriage is so long-term that it's not wise to divorce unless she really wants to date or otherwise really shake things up.

This divorce will affect grandparenting. That may be quite saddening.

This should be literally the last thing on her mind when divorcing

Oh really? You don't think it affects other family members? Somebody who stayed married maybe 30 years longer than they needed to for the kids, throwing in the towel?

It doesn't sound like an abusive or toxic marriage and these people are not far from retirement at C-Suite levels.

Split holidays, acrimony between adult kids, new partners, all sorts of stuff can flow from this decision.

I dont care if it "affects" other family members. Grandparents can F right off. Sounds like you're a real Karen interfering with other peoples relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree she may be depressed. She has lots of money to address quality of life issues.

Many people never fall in love like you see in the movies and a lot of that is hormonal and fades anyway. I think she's a bit old/the marriage is so long-term that it's not wise to divorce unless she really wants to date or otherwise really shake things up.

This divorce will affect grandparenting. That may be quite saddening.

This should be literally the last thing on her mind when divorcing

Oh really? You don't think it affects other family members? Somebody who stayed married maybe 30 years longer than they needed to for the kids, throwing in the towel?

It doesn't sound like an abusive or toxic marriage and these people are not far from retirement at C-Suite levels.

Split holidays, acrimony between adult kids, new partners, all sorts of stuff can flow from this decision.

Are you just making shit up now? Bye grandma, go MYOB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MYOB. She needs to contact an attorney.

This is literally the only advice OPs friend needs. Too bad OP can't get out of her own way to give it

[Anonymous]

She should see a therapist.

[Anonymous]

How old is your friend?

If she’s in her 40’s or 50’s step one is to get her health under control. See a therapist, go to the doctor, etc. she could be going through menopause and she definitely sounds depressed.

Are any of the children still at home?

She should start planning her exit in a way that makes sense. Maybe she won’t even want to once she gets better, but there’s a lot of planning that needs to happen before she has a conversation with her husband about ending the marriage.

[Anonymous]

Mid 40s and yes two children still at home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old is your friend?

If she’s in her 40’s or 50’s step one is to get her health under control. See a therapist, go to the doctor, etc. she could be going through menopause and she definitely sounds depressed.

Are any of the children still at home?

She should start planning her exit in a way that makes sense. Maybe she won’t even want to once she gets better, but there’s a lot of planning that needs to happen before she has a conversation with her husband about ending the marriage.

Exactly. Perimenopause often hits people harder, who are vulnerable to anxiety and depression. My anxiety was under control until I hit peri, and then it spiraled into hell. Luckily my husband is supportive.

[Anonymous]

Your friend seems to have mental health issues and be quite selfish. She married him knowing she wasn't really in love with him, had kids knowing she wasn't in love with him, and is now having to face the consequences of her own actions and acting like this was an unexpected outcome. I realize you don't want anyone talking bad about her, but come on. She needs to get her mental health in order before she blows up her kids lives anymore by her selfish actions.

[Anonymous]

Tell her to stop being dramatic. Who likes someone who will make their life difficult in a divorce? She needs to make up her mind on whether she is going to feign being a matyr or not.

She married someone she didn't love, had a good enough life with them and now needs some drama for her midlife crisis. Please.