Why All The Striver Hate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people spewing the striver stuff are classist. Ignore them.

We live in a wealthy neighborhood and there definitely is a subset of snobby adult rich children who are very average/below average. I am sure these are the type of people who look down on people they call strivers. These rich adult kids are average looks, average academics, average everything and then marry someone just like them and then have average kids with rich grandparents who pay for their private schools. We are surrounded by these type of people.

I was a Corporate Bankruptcy lawyer and the running joke was that children who inherit daddy's company are the reason that Corp Bk lawyers have houses in the Hamptons. Second generation wealthy children are almost invariably fuc*-ups.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s also different with parents who were born and raised here in immigrant households, and attended selective colleges a generation ago. They may show some “striver” qualities but may also be more aware that a T-20 isn’t the be-all and end-all of everything. They may feel more confident or secure in some ways because they’ve already navigated this country’s education system?

Hi Ashley, unfortunately no.
Striver is perceived. Your third generation precious Asian kids will be perceived the same as the second generation Asian kids. We are all the same to them, unless your kid put a post-it note on forehead "I am a third generation Asian" every day.

SLACs have a lot more third/fourth generation Asian kids and far less second generation immigrant Asian kids. But they are already complaining about too many Asians there, and some thinks SLACs are striver schools now.

Well, many third generation Asian kids are half Asian and half white so they are not perceived the same as immigrant Asian kids who are 100 percent Asian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are these schools striver schools?
Johns Hopkins
Rice
Stern
Cornell.

Strivers are people not schools. I guess that there could be "striver schools" i.e. those obsessed over by stivers but Stern and Rice would not be among those schools. Ivies are "striver schools" because strivers (or Asian gunners as someone mentioned) are coveted because of their name and prestige, nothing in particular about any individual school really matters. Any kid who shotguns all 8 Ivies is likely a striver because those schools have nothing in common except prestige and an athletic conference. Same goes for kids who shotgun the T20 or obsess about Berkley, they are even worse in their desperate quest for prestige.

I am sure that there are many white "strivers" but my experience is that of the white upper class kids many go to top SLACs because they have little desire to be around "striver culture", or top publics if they really love engineering. They may apply to Ivies or other top schools but they don't obsess because they already have their brass ring, they are just polishing.

What a nonsense observation. Plenty of top SLACs have “striver” culture as well as sizable Asian populations (who I guess are all strivers).

The wealthiest students are also the ones that most covet the “striver” jobs in banking, consulting, P/E.

You obviously haven't spent much time around top SLACs and the kids that you are talking about. Asian populations at top SLACs are less than half of what they are at top universities. Entitled cultures exist but stiver culture not so much. What you care calling a "striver job" for the those referred to as "strivers" in this thread are not striver jobs for the wealthiest students. They are normal jobs and they don't "strive", rather they assume that they will succeed in getting one because if you are a wealthy, athletic, hard working smart kid at Williams or Middlebury and you really want to go into banking or consulting you will have that opportunity.

Again…complete nonsense. Williams is full of kids that meet DCUM’s definition of “striver”.

The Asian population at Pomona is 22%…it’s 17% at Brown…it’s 14% at Williams…it’s 12.5% at Dartmouth…or are Brown and Dartmouth now not striver schools either.

Please, stop spewing shit.

+1. Top SLACs have tons of strivers and not just the Asian kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people spewing the striver stuff are classist. Ignore them.

We live in a wealthy neighborhood and there definitely is a subset of snobby adult rich children who are very average/below average. I am sure these are the type of people who look down on people they call strivers. These rich adult kids are average looks, average academics, average everything and then marry someone just like them and then have average kids with rich grandparents who pay for their private schools. We are surrounded by these type of people.

this! yes! I am a first gen white kid doctor married to a formerly poor white doc, both went to ivies, met at a top med school, ie all strivers there. Many of our ivy and med classmates were the generational wealth type, and many were like us: none of them ever looked down on fellow smart kids. It is a particular subset of wealthy who do this: namely the non-smart entitled ones.
Our kids' private has tons of generational wealth entitled people who get mad when others do better. Our first is at an ivy no hooks--different ivy than ours. Our second is at a non-ivy top10, third has yet to apply. They are just really smart kids who work hard and are lucky we can afford a top school we did not get to go to. The uber rich parents in the private all have average kids. The kids are not in the top classes and they seem unaware that other kids are much smarter than theirs until they are told theirs have no chance at UVA in state. Suddenly the world is unfair because of all the "try-hards" who are pushing their kids out and there is always some favoritsm they presume. One even asked us if we donated a lot to the high school to get them the top academic awards., or called in a favor at the ivy. Uh not our ivy we do not know anyone to call, and it is not the 80s. Our $ is all in 529s for college or goes to our favorite local charity. These people are really out of touch. They get so annoyed when their money does not buy them top grades and their kids have to settle for fancy non-elite privates like SMU and Elon.

[Anonymous]

It’s a term often used by mediocre, talentless and jealous white people to justify their own incompetence and failure. It’s a mental illness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s a term often used by mediocre, talentless and jealous white people to justify their own incompetence and failure. It’s a mental illness.

Most likely lazy too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are these schools striver schools?
Johns Hopkins
Rice
Stern
Cornell.

Strivers are people not schools. I guess that there could be "striver schools" i.e. those obsessed over by stivers but Stern and Rice would not be among those schools. Ivies are "striver schools" because strivers (or Asian gunners as someone mentioned) are coveted because of their name and prestige, nothing in particular about any individual school really matters. Any kid who shotguns all 8 Ivies is likely a striver because those schools have nothing in common except prestige and an athletic conference. Same goes for kids who shotgun the T20 or obsess about Berkley, they are even worse in their desperate quest for prestige.

I am sure that there are many white "strivers" but my experience is that of the white upper class kids many go to top SLACs because they have little desire to be around "striver culture", or top publics if they really love engineering. They may apply to Ivies or other top schools but they don't obsess because they already have their brass ring, they are just polishing.

What a nonsense observation. Plenty of top SLACs have “striver” culture as well as sizable Asian populations (who I guess are all strivers).

The wealthiest students are also the ones that most covet the “striver” jobs in banking, consulting, P/E.

You obviously haven't spent much time around top SLACs and the kids that you are talking about. Asian populations at top SLACs are less than half of what they are at top universities. Entitled cultures exist but stiver culture not so much. What you care calling a "striver job" for the those referred to as "strivers" in this thread are not striver jobs for the wealthiest students. They are normal jobs and they don't "strive", rather they assume that they will succeed in getting one because if you are a wealthy, athletic, hard working smart kid at Williams or Middlebury and you really want to go into banking or consulting you will have that opportunity.

Again…complete nonsense. Williams is full of kids that meet DCUM’s definition of “striver”.

The Asian population at Pomona is 22%…it’s 17% at Brown…it’s 14% at Williams…it’s 12.5% at Dartmouth…or are Brown and Dartmouth now not striver schools either.

Please, stop spewing shit.

You just proved that you can do some basic searches on the internet but you only looked at half the equation. Why not check HYPSM for the Asian count? All you managed to do is point out that the Asian striver crowd doesn't succeed at Brown and Dartmouth; they still applied because they are Ivies and that is what matters to so many.

Regarding Williams; when you confuse the pre-professional boarding school kids with 'striver' you just demonstrate a lack of intellect. They aren't striving, they are just preparing for the jobs that they believe are theirs. Your community college education is failing you, pack it in and pick up your kids from violin parctice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are these schools striver schools?
Johns Hopkins
Rice
Stern
Cornell.

Strivers are people not schools. I guess that there could be "striver schools" i.e. those obsessed over by stivers but Stern and Rice would not be among those schools. Ivies are "striver schools" because strivers (or Asian gunners as someone mentioned) are coveted because of their name and prestige, nothing in particular about any individual school really matters. Any kid who shotguns all 8 Ivies is likely a striver because those schools have nothing in common except prestige and an athletic conference. Same goes for kids who shotgun the T20 or obsess about Berkley, they are even worse in their desperate quest for prestige.

I am sure that there are many white "strivers" but my experience is that of the white upper class kids many go to top SLACs because they have little desire to be around "striver culture", or top publics if they really love engineering. They may apply to Ivies or other top schools but they don't obsess because they already have their brass ring, they are just polishing.

What a nonsense observation. Plenty of top SLACs have “striver” culture as well as sizable Asian populations (who I guess are all strivers).

The wealthiest students are also the ones that most covet the “striver” jobs in banking, consulting, P/E.

You obviously haven't spent much time around top SLACs and the kids that you are talking about. Asian populations at top SLACs are less than half of what they are at top universities. Entitled cultures exist but stiver culture not so much. What you care calling a "striver job" for the those referred to as "strivers" in this thread are not striver jobs for the wealthiest students. They are normal jobs and they don't "strive", rather they assume that they will succeed in getting one because if you are a wealthy, athletic, hard working smart kid at Williams or Middlebury and you really want to go into banking or consulting you will have that opportunity.

Again…complete nonsense. Williams is full of kids that meet DCUM’s definition of “striver”.

The Asian population at Pomona is 22%…it’s 17% at Brown…it’s 14% at Williams…it’s 12.5% at Dartmouth…or are Brown and Dartmouth now not striver schools either.

Please, stop spewing shit.

+1. Top SLACs have tons of strivers and not just the Asian kids.

To be fair, even Maryland and UVA have strivers because they didn’t get in

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s a term often used by mediocre, talentless and jealous white people to justify their own incompetence and failure. It’s a mental illness.

Can’t look down on people unless you’re above them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ironically, for many DCUM serves as a place to manage their striver tendencies. People have questions about schools, rankings, etc and if they asked them publicly they would be perceived as strivers because those are topics strivers tend to obsess about. Here you can ask anonymously (though the quality of the responses is questionable).

I am a high achiever but like to be around people who “act like they’ve been there before.” (Love that phrase). Strivers don’t do that. They are constantly very publicly gunning to be the best rather than being more discreet about it. It often tends to be immigrants who don’t understand how the upper class in America socializes and haven’t properly assimilated but there are plenty of white folk who also do this.

My child got into a top selective school. When we visited we saw a ton of kids like this. We visited a class room where the teacher was discussing the school’s science curriculum and a kid raised their hand and asked what percentage of kids from this school go to Ivies. Not the time or place for the question (which can also easily be answered online). That is a striver. My child chose to go elsewhere.

I am not so sure American has “upper class.” Who are they? Do you consider trump being one?

Trump actually personifies striver. But he is worse. He is low class trash.

He desperately wanted to be accepted by the upper class. But they constantly rejected him. This is what fuels his grievances. Lots of articles about this.

Strivers think Trump is great. Those who have made it are horrified by him. It is a great litmus test. And not simply political - I know people who think he is crass and horrible but vote for him.

And I know plenty of highly accomplished immigrants who are not strivers. They are working hard to be successful. But they know how to be subtle about it. From what I have heard, contrary to what someone above said, Sundar Pichai is extremely not striver. Worked hard at Wharton without being a jerk, worked his way up but knew when to talk and when to shut up. Doesn’t advertise his wealth.

+100 Post of the day

I worked at Google for years and you are spot on. Sundar is the anthesis of striver.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have never, never heard the term applied to white people. Rich, white people don’t have to strive. They already have money, legacy at top colleges, connections, etc. If they go to Ole Miss or Auburn, who cares? Mom and Dad will get them an internship in the summer through their connections. It is usually about social mobility, so I guess it could be applied to white kids that are not UMC or are first gen? Maybe kids use it differently than adults.

It’s because you don’t move in that space. If you’ve ever been to one of their gatherings, they point out the strivers.

I am a rich white person. I have been to plenty gatherings. No one points out strivers.

Different than being wealthy.

Did your parents buy a wing at your college?

That is a whole different level and most of them are actually a bit low key about it.

How do you define wealthy?

Wealthy are the families you want your student to go to school with because their dad is going to fund your startup. Or he started Boston consulting group and he’s going to get you a job.

Nobody’s worried about rich people who have nice houses, nobody cares about them nobody’s trying to get invited to your house or your party or your country club. Big deal if you can’t get me anything why would a striver wanna hang out with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people spewing the striver stuff are classist. Ignore them.

We live in a wealthy neighborhood and there definitely is a subset of snobby adult rich children who are very average/below average. I am sure these are the type of people who look down on people they call strivers. These rich adult kids are average looks, average academics, average everything and then marry someone just like them and then have average kids with rich grandparents who pay for their private schools. We are surrounded by these type of people.

this! yes! I am a first gen white kid doctor married to a formerly poor white doc, both went to ivies, met at a top med school, i.e. all strivers there. Many of our ivy and med classmates were the generational wealth type, and many were like us: none of them ever looked down on fellow smart kids. It is a particular subset of wealthy who do this: namely the non-smart entitled ones.
Our kids' private has tons of generational wealth entitled people who get mad when others do better. Our first is at an ivy no hooks--different ivy than ours. Our second is at a non-ivy top10, third has yet to apply. They are just really smart kids who work hard and are lucky we can afford a top school we did not get to go to. The uber rich parents in the private all have average kids. The kids are not in the top classes and they seem unaware that other kids are much smarter than theirs until they are told theirs have no chance at UVA in state. Suddenly the world is unfair because of all the "try-hards" who are pushing their kids out and there is always some favoritism they presume. One even asked us if we donated a lot to the high school to get them the top academic awards., or called in a favor at the ivy. Uh not our ivy we do not know anyone to call, and it is not the 80s. Our $ is all in 529s for college or goes to our favorite local charity. These people are really out of touch. They get so annoyed when their money does not buy them top grades and their kids have to settle for fancy non-elite privates like SMU and Elon.

This is quite the bit of fiction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ironically, for many DCUM serves as a place to manage their striver tendencies. People have questions about schools, rankings, etc and if they asked them publicly they would be perceived as strivers because those are topics strivers tend to obsess about. Here you can ask anonymously (though the quality of the responses is questionable).

I am a high achiever but like to be around people who “act like they’ve been there before.” (Love that phrase). Strivers don’t do that. They are constantly very publicly gunning to be the best rather than being more discreet about it. It often tends to be immigrants who don’t understand how the upper class in America socializes and haven’t properly assimilated but there are plenty of white folk who also do this.

My child got into a top selective school. When we visited we saw a ton of kids like this. We visited a class room where the teacher was discussing the school’s science curriculum and a kid raised their hand and asked what percentage of kids from this school go to Ivies. Not the time or place for the question (which can also easily be answered online). That is a striver. My child chose to go elsewhere.

I am not so sure American has “upper class.” Who are they? Do you consider trump being one?

Trump actually personifies striver. But he is worse. He is low class trash.

He desperately wanted to be accepted by the upper class. But they constantly rejected him. This is what fuels his grievances. Lots of articles about this.

Strivers think Trump is great. Those who have made it are horrified by him. It is a great litmus test. And not simply political - I know people who think he is crass and horrible but vote for him.

And I know plenty of highly accomplished immigrants who are not strivers. They are working hard to be successful. But they know how to be subtle about it. From what I have heard, contrary to what someone above said, Sundar Pichai is extremely not striver. Worked hard at Wharton without being a jerk, worked his way up but knew when to talk and when to shut up. Doesn’t advertise his wealth.

+100 Post of the day

I worked at Google for years and you are spot on. Sundar is the anthesis of striver.

Same with Sergey Brin, went to Maryland started Google

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people spewing the striver stuff are classist. Ignore them.

We live in a wealthy neighborhood and there definitely is a subset of snobby adult rich children who are very average/below average. I am sure these are the type of people who look down on people they call strivers. These rich adult kids are average looks, average academics, average everything and then marry someone just like them and then have average kids with rich grandparents who pay for their private schools. We are surrounded by these type of people.

this! yes! I am a first gen white kid doctor married to a formerly poor white doc, both went to ivies, met at a top med school, ie all strivers there. Many of our ivy and med classmates were the generational wealth type, and many were like us: none of them ever looked down on fellow smart kids. It is a particular subset of wealthy who do this: namely the non-smart entitled ones.
Our kids' private has tons of generational wealth entitled people who get mad when others do better. Our first is at an ivy no hooks--different ivy than ours. Our second is at a non-ivy top10, third has yet to apply. They are just really smart kids who work hard and are lucky we can afford a top school we did not get to go to. The uber rich parents in the private all have average kids. The kids are not in the top classes and they seem unaware that other kids are much smarter than theirs until they are told theirs have no chance at UVA in state. Suddenly the world is unfair because of all the "try-hards" who are pushing their kids out and there is always some favoritsm they presume. One even asked us if we donated a lot to the high school to get them the top academic awards., or called in a favor at the ivy. Uh not our ivy we do not know anyone to call, and it is not the 80s. Our $ is all in 529s for college or goes to our favorite local charity. These people are really out of touch. They get so annoyed when their money does not buy them top grades and their kids have to settle for fancy non-elite privates like SMU and Elon.

Nobody’s getting denied from UVA and then having their parents call an Ivy League school to get in.

Omg why do you guys make this stuff up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s a term often used by mediocre, talentless and jealous white people to justify their own incompetence and failure. It’s a mental illness.

Can’t look down on people unless you’re above them.

It’s not about looking down. It’s mental sickness. Wannabes have no problem pretending to be superior even though they actually suck.