How to stop being so frugal/cheap?

[Anonymous]

Why would you want to stop? To keep up with the Joneses? To spend money just to spend money? Why not just save your money. Who fking cares? We are a nation of debt slaves and you are worried about saving too much? Maybe you don’t actually need the latest stupid tchotchke from Instagram.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't shop unless we need something. But I have no problem spending $50+ on a pair of jeans that I love, or a Lululemon sports bra for DD because that's what she really wants and will wear it once a week.

I consider it wasteful to buy a bunch of stuff that you don't love. I buy fewer, nicer things for my family. It doesn't seem to cost any more than buying a bunch of cheap, trendy stuff and we feel good wearing the items.

The problem is a lot of people confuse “more expensive” with “nicer.” The two are not the same. Teens in particular have not learned this yet.

Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. I don't buy designer handbags and I'm not a fan of logos on my clothes. Sometimes I can find high quality items that I love for low prices on sale or at discount stores. But that Lululemon sports bra really is higher quality than the ones at TJ Maxx.

Yes---my Lulu will last me 5-7+ years, basic stuff from target/TJ maxx will be finished in 3-4 years tops.

To a certain point, you get what you pay for. However, once you hit Lulu level, you don't really get "higher quality" above that, most above that is about the Name and the name only. So a $300 sports bra from a luxury brand (above Lulu) is not any or much better.
So the key is finding the lowest level of "luxury" that is still providing more quality. Once you hit that, realize anything else is just paying for the brand.

Like nobody in DCUM needs a Canadian Goose jacket, you simply don't. It does not get that cold here. And you can find really good Patagonia equivalents for 1/2 or 1/3 the price.

Sure you can wear a target jacket and it will "do the job decently" but the Patagonia will do the job for 10+ years and still be going strong

+1

Even Lulu and Patagonia are “paying for the brand.” Nike and Columbia are just as good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't shop unless we need something. But I have no problem spending $50+ on a pair of jeans that I love, or a Lululemon sports bra for DD because that's what she really wants and will wear it once a week.

I consider it wasteful to buy a bunch of stuff that you don't love. I buy fewer, nicer things for my family. It doesn't seem to cost any more than buying a bunch of cheap, trendy stuff and we feel good wearing the items.

The problem is a lot of people confuse “more expensive” with “nicer.” The two are not the same. Teens in particular have not learned this yet.

Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. I don't buy designer handbags and I'm not a fan of logos on my clothes. Sometimes I can find high quality items that I love for low prices on sale or at discount stores. But that Lululemon sports bra really is higher quality than the ones at TJ Maxx.

Yes---my Lulu will last me 5-7+ years, basic stuff from target/TJ maxx will be finished in 3-4 years tops.

To a certain point, you get what you pay for. However, once you hit Lulu level, you don't really get "higher quality" above that, most above that is about the Name and the name only. So a $300 sports bra from a luxury brand (above Lulu) is not any or much better.
So the key is finding the lowest level of "luxury" that is still providing more quality. Once you hit that, realize anything else is just paying for the brand.

Like nobody in DCUM needs a Canadian Goose jacket, you simply don't. It does not get that cold here. And you can find really good Patagonia equivalents for 1/2 or 1/3 the price.

Sure you can wear a target jacket and it will "do the job decently" but the Patagonia will do the job for 10+ years and still be going strong

+1

Even Lulu and Patagonia are “paying for the brand.” Nike and Columbia are just as good.

Lulu is usually a little bit better quality than Nike and only a little bit more expensive. We buy both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a really hard time spending money even if it's something I need, I can't buy it. For example $15 pizza, $13 deodorant, $25 water bottle, $50 dollar jeans, $60 jacket. Normal things that people buy everyday for those prices and it just seems too hard to buy it and when I do I feel a lot of guilt. Growing up my parents were super cheap though. I can afford it all but I physically can't.

Is it not wanting to spend or not wanting more stuff? I can afford things but after listening to lots of decluttering podcasts, just want things out of the house. I figure I have enough things like socks and cooking equipment etc to last me the rest of my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't shop unless we need something. But I have no problem spending $50+ on a pair of jeans that I love, or a Lululemon sports bra for DD because that's what she really wants and will wear it once a week.

I consider it wasteful to buy a bunch of stuff that you don't love. I buy fewer, nicer things for my family. It doesn't seem to cost any more than buying a bunch of cheap, trendy stuff and we feel good wearing the items.

The problem is a lot of people confuse “more expensive” with “nicer.” The two are not the same. Teens in particular have not learned this yet.

Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. I don't buy designer handbags and I'm not a fan of logos on my clothes. Sometimes I can find high quality items that I love for low prices on sale or at discount stores. But that Lululemon sports bra really is higher quality than the ones at TJ Maxx.

Yes---my Lulu will last me 5-7+ years, basic stuff from target/TJ maxx will be finished in 3-4 years tops.

To a certain point, you get what you pay for. However, once you hit Lulu level, you don't really get "higher quality" above that, most above that is about the Name and the name only. So a $300 sports bra from a luxury brand (above Lulu) is not any or much better.
So the key is finding the lowest level of "luxury" that is still providing more quality. Once you hit that, realize anything else is just paying for the brand.

Like nobody in DCUM needs a Canadian Goose jacket, you simply don't. It does not get that cold here. And you can find really good Patagonia equivalents for 1/2 or 1/3 the price.

Sure you can wear a target jacket and it will "do the job decently" but the Patagonia will do the job for 10+ years and still be going strong

+1

Even Lulu and Patagonia are “paying for the brand.” Nike and Columbia are just as good.

I've had both Patagonia and Columbia. They are not "just as good". Columbia is good, but Patagonia is ethical and cares about sourcing material. They also have a guarantee they will fix any item or replace it. Had a $450 Patagonia that had broken zipper. Jacket was 4 years old. They couldn't replace with the right type of zipper (would no longer be waterproof) , so they gave me a gift card with $450+ sales tax on it. No questions asked. It was my choice to let them fix the best they could or get a refund.
I know aColumbia does not offer that level of service.
But beyond that, the Patagonia is a superior product. Now for most people the Columbia is "enough", it's a damn good jacket. But if you can afford it (and choose to spend it), the Patagonia is a Better product. You are paying for much more than just a brand name

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a really hard time spending money even if it's something I need, I can't buy it. For example $15 pizza, $13 deodorant, $25 water bottle, $50 dollar jeans, $60 jacket. Normal things that people buy everyday for those prices and it just seems too hard to buy it and when I do I feel a lot of guilt. Growing up my parents were super cheap though. I can afford it all but I physically can't.

Is it not wanting to spend or not wanting more stuff? I can afford things but after listening to lots of decluttering podcasts, just want things out of the house. I figure I have enough things like socks and cooking equipment etc to last me the rest of my life.

DP: for me it is not wanting more stuff to clutter up my life. So I only purchase things I actually need, and most often it is to replace items that need replacing.

[Anonymous]

I know someone like this and she always looks inappropriately dressed (both for work and special occasions) because she’ll only buy clothing at thrift stores. It would be one thing if she truly didn’t have money but she has plenty ( 2 professional income family, no debt, plenty of savings and investments). I feel sorry for her, as she’s held hostage to something that borders on a mental illness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know someone like this and she always looks inappropriately dressed (both for work and special occasions) because she’ll only buy clothing at thrift stores. It would be one thing if she truly didn’t have money but she has plenty ( 2 professional income family, no debt, plenty of savings and investments). I feel sorry for her, as she’s held hostage to something that borders on a mental illness.

I know these types too. The blouses and sweaters are the giveaway. They would be better off with a uniform or capsule type wardrobe in simple colors.

[Anonymous]

check out Ramit Sethi

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't shop unless we need something. But I have no problem spending $50+ on a pair of jeans that I love, or a Lululemon sports bra for DD because that's what she really wants and will wear it once a week.

I consider it wasteful to buy a bunch of stuff that you don't love. I buy fewer, nicer things for my family. It doesn't seem to cost any more than buying a bunch of cheap, trendy stuff and we feel good wearing the items.

The problem is a lot of people confuse “more expensive” with “nicer.” The two are not the same. Teens in particular have not learned this yet.

Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. I don't buy designer handbags and I'm not a fan of logos on my clothes. Sometimes I can find high quality items that I love for low prices on sale or at discount stores. But that Lululemon sports bra really is higher quality than the ones at TJ Maxx.

Yes---my Lulu will last me 5-7+ years, basic stuff from target/TJ maxx will be finished in 3-4 years tops.

To a certain point, you get what you pay for. However, once you hit Lulu level, you don't really get "higher quality" above that, most above that is about the Name and the name only. So a $300 sports bra from a luxury brand (above Lulu) is not any or much better.
So the key is finding the lowest level of "luxury" that is still providing more quality. Once you hit that, realize anything else is just paying for the brand.

Like nobody in DCUM needs a Canadian Goose jacket, you simply don't. It does not get that cold here. And you can find really good Patagonia equivalents for 1/2 or 1/3 the price.

Sure you can wear a target jacket and it will "do the job decently" but the Patagonia will do the job for 10+ years and still be going strong

+1

Even Lulu and Patagonia are “paying for the brand.” Nike and Columbia are just as good.

I've had both Patagonia and Columbia. They are not "just as good". Columbia is good, but Patagonia is ethical and cares about sourcing material. They also have a guarantee they will fix any item or replace it. Had a $450 Patagonia that had broken zipper. Jacket was 4 years old. They couldn't replace with the right type of zipper (would no longer be waterproof) , so they gave me a gift card with $450+ sales tax on it. No questions asked. It was my choice to let them fix the best they could or get a refund.
I know aColumbia does not offer that level of service.
But beyond that, the Patagonia is a superior product. Now for most people the Columbia is "enough", it's a damn good jacket. But if you can afford it (and choose to spend it), the Patagonia is a Better product. You are paying for much more than just a brand name

This. I also like the look of my Patagonia gear more than Columbia.

[Anonymous]

Everything you’ve listed and the associated price is silly. You’re right, $25 for a water bottle is too much. There’s always a happy medium. As and example, here’s 2 for $10.

https://a.co/d/eOw3lwn

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a really hard time spending money even if it's something I need, I can't buy it. For example $15 pizza, $13 deodorant, $25 water bottle, $50 dollar jeans, $60 jacket. Normal things that people buy everyday for those prices and it just seems too hard to buy it and when I do I feel a lot of guilt. Growing up my parents were super cheap though. I can afford it all but I physically can't.

?????

Except for the pizza, those are high prices. $13 for deodorant?? Is it a pounder?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know someone like this and she always looks inappropriately dressed (both for work and special occasions) because she’ll only buy clothing at thrift stores. It would be one thing if she truly didn’t have money but she has plenty ( 2 professional income family, no debt, plenty of savings and investments). I feel sorry for her, as she’s held hostage to something that borders on a mental illness.

Sounds like she's winning. He wardrobe isn't holding back her success.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't shop unless we need something. But I have no problem spending $50+ on a pair of jeans that I love, or a Lululemon sports bra for DD because that's what she really wants and will wear it once a week.

I consider it wasteful to buy a bunch of stuff that you don't love. I buy fewer, nicer things for my family. It doesn't seem to cost any more than buying a bunch of cheap, trendy stuff and we feel good wearing the items.

The problem is a lot of people confuse “more expensive” with “nicer.” The two are not the same. Teens in particular have not learned this yet.

Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. I don't buy designer handbags and I'm not a fan of logos on my clothes. Sometimes I can find high quality items that I love for low prices on sale or at discount stores. But that Lululemon sports bra really is higher quality than the ones at TJ Maxx.

Yes---my Lulu will last me 5-7+ years, basic stuff from target/TJ maxx will be finished in 3-4 years tops.

To a certain point, you get what you pay for. However, once you hit Lulu level, you don't really get "higher quality" above that, most above that is about the Name and the name only. So a $300 sports bra from a luxury brand (above Lulu) is not any or much better.
So the key is finding the lowest level of "luxury" that is still providing more quality. Once you hit that, realize anything else is just paying for the brand.

Like nobody in DCUM needs a Canadian Goose jacket, you simply don't. It does not get that cold here. And you can find really good Patagonia equivalents for 1/2 or 1/3 the price.

Sure you can wear a target jacket and it will "do the job decently" but the Patagonia will do the job for 10+ years and still be going strong

+1

Even Lulu and Patagonia are “paying for the brand.” Nike and Columbia are just as good.

I've had both Patagonia and Columbia. They are not "just as good". Columbia is good, but Patagonia is ethical and cares about sourcing material. They also have a guarantee they will fix any item or replace it. Had a $450 Patagonia that had broken zipper. Jacket was 4 years old. They couldn't replace with the right type of zipper (would no longer be waterproof) , so they gave me a gift card with $450+ sales tax on it. No questions asked. It was my choice to let them fix the best they could or get a refund.
I know aColumbia does not offer that level of service.
But beyond that, the Patagonia is a superior product. Now for most people the Columbia is "enough", it's a damn good jacket. But if you can afford it (and choose to spend it), the Patagonia is a Better product. You are paying for much more than just a brand name

How do you do Patagonia repair? Do you mail in? Drop off at store?
Do you need a receipt or is the article its own proof of eligibility?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a really hard time spending money even if it's something I need, I can't buy it. For example $15 pizza, $13 deodorant, $25 water bottle, $50 dollar jeans, $60 jacket. Normal things that people buy everyday for those prices and it just seems too hard to buy it and when I do I feel a lot of guilt. Growing up my parents were super cheap though. I can afford it all but I physically can't.

Is it not wanting to spend or not wanting more stuff? I can afford things but after listening to lots of decluttering podcasts, just want things out of the house. I figure I have enough things like socks and cooking equipment etc to last me the rest of my life.

DP: for me it is not wanting more stuff to clutter up my life. So I only purchase things I actually need, and most often it is to replace items that need replacing.

This. I am also not paying 4x for a coat because I “like the look of it” better or they will “fix the zipper.” I have never in my life needed to do that anyway. It’s fine if some people want to shop for image, but it’s a lie to pretend that isn’t what they are doing. Watch them protest now.