Why do people feel entitled to not live with roommates?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We should pass a law enforcing minimum household sizes or heavily tax single occupancy dwellings.

So if your parents are currently living in a one bedroom apartment, and one of them dies, you want your other parent to be forced to let someone else move in with them? Or be "heavily taxed?"

Yes, comrade. Resources must be maximized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because that doesn’t fix the underlying issue that housing costs are out of control. It’s just kicking the can further down the road - next its “just get 2 jobs” or “start a side hustle” when reality is that people should be able to afford housing and expenses on $65k. We shouldn’t need to be millionaires just to have a house and a car.

To put it in perspective - 5 years ago, I rented a 1 bedroom apartment for $700. That same apartment now goes for nearly $1400. Housing prices should NOT be doubling every 5 years, that’s insane.

Salaries are not rising in step with basic living costs, and getting a roommate won’t fix that problem.

You're missing the point(s). First, it was the norm for young adults to have roommates because we couldn't have afforded to live alone. This is not a new phenomenon. Second, we didn't complaint about it all the freakin' time. It was a fact of life, and you dealt with it. If you didn't like it, you worked to change it.

Actually, the norm was that people got married very young (early 20s) and could buy a house, a car, and support a family on one salary.

Now you need dual incomes and 10 years on the job just to be able to afford rent and one kid. Forget buying a house.

US prices are completely out of control and anyone saying “shut up we didn’t complain” is out of touch with reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They didn't grow up with Golden Girls

And Threeʻs Company!

also:

Kate & Allie

The Odd Couple

Don’t forget Friends. Gen-X TV kid here, and pop culture taught me that having roommates is fun! The reality of it wasn’t always fun, but it’s good for learning how to compromise and coexist with other humans. I hate the thought of young people just hiding away by themselves with their screens.

I don't actually think it is great to coexist within a home/apartment. Coexisting is hard even with families. I have a teen ds who wakes up at 5am...wakes me up. Dh goes to bed way too late...wakes me up. Sharing chores and various levels of comfort with cleanliness and clutter is hard as well. Compromise is sort of a myth when it comes to one's bio rhythms and habits: someone always sacrifices more and gets to experience discomfort. I live with it just fine because it's my family and I love them. Roommates I don't love? No, it would drive me crazy.

This take makes me sad! Yes there are situations that are tough or not worth it, but for many young people living in a shared apartment or group house have benefits socially that outweigh those discomforts! I loved coming home and hanging out with roommates and our friends, my life would have been so much lonelier in college and in my 20s if I was living alone. Sharing a bedroom is a hard no though!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s normal to expect a full time job to pay for a separate accommodation (however small) and a car that’s not a beater at least, preferably newish.
I mean why slave away otherwise?

What's your other option?

Part time work and living with roommates lol

[Anonymous]

I like to have my space and privacy. I lived with a roommate for a year and did not like it. Even now, married with kids, I have my own room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had roommates in college and also when I lived in a very expensive city for grad school.

I cherished living alone before being married. I grew up in a household with a mentally ill sibling and it was exhausting. I loved having my own space and hearing myself think. My roommate in grad school was super odd and only left the house to go to work and visit their parent once a month. They didn't date or seem to have friends and were very controlling and OCD to the degree that we couldn't share the same side of the fridge.

Omg, I thought I had written the post and forgot. My roommate also never left the house, demanded I have a separate toilet paper roll, and locked her bedroom every time she went to the bathroom or used common areas. It was exhausting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They didn't grow up with Golden Girls

And Threeʻs Company!

Omg that show was so scandalous for the times!
A male roommate living (in his *own* bedroom in a 2-bedroom apartment with his two platonic female friends who shared the second bedroom) was such a taboo that he had to pretend to be gay so that the landlord (played by Don Knotts) would agree to allow him to stay there! The “no hanky-panky” rule was strong—and the general consensus among all of middle America was that opposite sex single roommates would definitely lead to all sorts of inappropriate shenanigans!

[Anonymous]

If privacy and peace are important, instead of getting a bigger apartment in a nicer neighborhood near work, get smaller apartment in an acceptable neighborhood at reasonable commute. Same cost, different priorities.

[Anonymous]

I had friends in my 20s and early 30s who were aghast at me having roommates. But they largely had lots of family money or at least a tri-state guarantor (NYC people will remember what I’m talking about- it’s changed so much now and is way easier!). I lived with roommates from freshman year of college until I was 31, and then I lived with DH. There have been times when I’ve longed for my own space, but I had so much fun with 95% of my roommates and my life was better for them.

I grew up in a house with a mentally ill sibling and depressed mom and autistic dad, so I think that part of me was just happy with the novelty of sharing space with people who weren’t dangerous, withdrawn or unpredictable.

Anyway, I think roommates are really important and it’s one of the things I use to screen college babysitters. If they’ve had at least 1-2 years of group living situations, I know they’ll be more adaptable and attentive to others’ needs. And more fun!

[Anonymous]

I had roommates for 3 of 4 years in college. I was very happy to get a single my senior year. Had a roommate for the first two years out on my own after college. My roommate was great, and is still a good friend. But I was so happy to be able to move out on my own after she left the area. I paid through the nose for my efficiency apartment. But it was all mine. I'm pretty introverted, and having roommates as long as it was a financial necessity was ok, but once I could afford my own place, that was it. Now long married and with kids, I occasionally miss my own place.

[Anonymous]

I would run a house for women like the TV shows and movies of old where the head of household makes a meal and most of the tenants eat together after work if that was still something that people wanted. Most women don't want to live with parental rules either anymore. No thanks to housing random men who could he dangerous and drugs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Somewhere between the 60s and 90s people turned into absolute psychopaths. You had roommates killing each other, roommates attempting to kill elderly home owners, neighbors turned out to be killers and crazy. That’s why!

Crime was much, MUCH more common in the 60s through the 90s than it is now.

I doubt it. People have just stopped reporting criminal activity. Law enforcement is pressured to make crime rates look good and if people think nothing will be done, why file a report? As a society we”ve become desensitized to crime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a terrible roommate experience in college that ended up costing me way more than I saved by sharing an apartment.
We were equally responsible for rent (no such thing as individual leases at that time/location) and she just stopped paying. I had to pay it or they would take both of us to court/collections.
After that, I rented my own apartment.

This happened to me too. Except we went to court and got evicted. Never again with roommates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because that doesn’t fix the underlying issue that housing costs are out of control. It’s just kicking the can further down the road - next its “just get 2 jobs” or “start a side hustle” when reality is that people should be able to afford housing and expenses on $65k. We shouldn’t need to be millionaires just to have a house and a car.

To put it in perspective - 5 years ago, I rented a 1 bedroom apartment for $700. That same apartment now goes for nearly $1400. Housing prices should NOT be doubling every 5 years, that’s insane.

Salaries are not rising in step with basic living costs, and getting a roommate won’t fix that problem.

You're missing the point(s). First, it was the norm for young adults to have roommates because we couldn't have afforded to live alone. This is not a new phenomenon. Second, we didn't complaint about it all the freakin' time. It was a fact of life, and you dealt with it. If you didn't like it, you worked to change it.

Actually, the norm was that people got married very young (early 20s) and could buy a house, a car, and support a family on one salary.

Now you need dual incomes and 10 years on the job just to be able to afford rent and one kid. Forget buying a house.

US prices are completely out of control and anyone saying “shut up we didn’t complain” is out of touch with reality.

That’s very true but when my colleague complained her 170k salary wasn’t enough I just couldn’t help it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because that doesn’t fix the underlying issue that housing costs are out of control. It’s just kicking the can further down the road - next its “just get 2 jobs” or “start a side hustle” when reality is that people should be able to afford housing and expenses on $65k. We shouldn’t need to be millionaires just to have a house and a car.

To put it in perspective - 5 years ago, I rented a 1 bedroom apartment for $700. That same apartment now goes for nearly $1400. Housing prices should NOT be doubling every 5 years, that’s insane.

Salaries are not rising in step with basic living costs, and getting a roommate won’t fix that problem.

You're missing the point(s). First, it was the norm for young adults to have roommates because we couldn't have afforded to live alone. This is not a new phenomenon. Second, we didn't complaint about it all the freakin' time. It was a fact of life, and you dealt with it. If you didn't like it, you worked to change it.

Actually, the norm was that people got married very young (early 20s) and could buy a house, a car, and support a family on one salary.

Now you need dual incomes and 10 years on the job just to be able to afford rent and one kid. Forget buying a house.

US prices are completely out of control and anyone saying “shut up we didn’t complain” is out of touch with reality.

That’s very true but when my colleague complained her 170k salary wasn’t enough I just couldn’t help it.

You guys need to stop working at McDonald's and get a real job.