Why do people feel entitled to not live with roommates?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm an introvert and like my place clean and organized. I can't deal with roommates.

You need a major attitude-adjustment ASAP.

Live simply, so that others can simply live!

wtf

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most families only have 1-2 kids now and don't grow up sharing a room. So suddenly having to do so as an adult is a real contrast to the way they were raised.

Agreed. If you don't learn how to get along and share as a kid, it's a lot harder to pick up as an adult.

[Anonymous]

Part of the problem is that US has onerous housing regulations that make single-resident housing impractical. Hyper expensive places elsewhere, like Japan and urban China have tiny housing without roommates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only had roommates one year in college. I’ve not had roommates on a much lower salary than 65k. You can always find ways. I don’t trust random people with my person, my pets and my things, and like my own space and quiet.

I had way more roommates than I ever wanted, including in a group housing situation on a study abroad where 4 girls shared a bedroom. It's not ideal, but you get used to it. In fact we all keep in touch 20 years later.

Just zero desire. I made choices like a longer commute to avoid it, free housing for specific duties… I don’t think anyone is entitled to tell people how to live. We all have different likes and priorities.

What part of my response made you think I was telling you how to live? The OP also wasn't telling you how to live.

The op clearly thinks people feel "entitled to not live with roommates". That is literally the topic question. And at least one person is arguing even further about it being a privileged position.

OP's position, while inflammatory, still isn't telling you how to live. That would be an obvious strawman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because the last roommate I had was dating two guys at the same time. One of them (boyfriend A, a guy she'd dated for years before breaking up with him) became suspicious of her excuses and showed up at our apartment while she was there with the other guy (boyfriend B). He broke into our apartment and the two guys had a massive fight. I hid in my walk-in closet because I wasn't sure if the guy who broke in had a gun with him b/c I knew he had a concealed carry. I called 911 after lots of crashing and breaking glass. The police came, everyone was sent to separate areas to cool off and speak with an officer, and in the end, no charges were pressed.

She literally gaslit boyfriend B into believing boyfriend A was insane, a semi-stalker, and unable to move on after their breakup. It worked because they stayed together and have now been married for almost 15 years and have 2 kids.

She also got super upset with me for calling 911. She did random petty things for the next 6 months of our lease to make my life miserable. Things like throwing out mail that came for me, leaving the water dripping all day b/c I paid the water bill and she paid electric. More than once I went out to go to work in the morning and my tires would be deflated. This was in 2005-06, so before home security systems were super common.

Never again will I live with a roommate. I'd rather live with my parents or be one of those van life people.

I think the internet has made the stories of psycho roommates more widely known.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most families only have 1-2 kids now and don't grow up sharing a room. So suddenly having to do so as an adult is a real contrast to the way they were raised.

Agreed. If you don't learn how to get along and share as a kid, it's a lot harder to pick up as an adult.

I shared a room my whole childhood (the only one of my friends who did) and all of college, and shared a house in grad school. By my early/mid 20s I was done with it and wanted my own place. My first solo apartment was bliss.

DH shared a house when I met him and, while I didn't think it was weird or immature, I didn't like hanging out there with his roommates and their noise and mess. Nothing to do with how I was raised, everything to do with personality and wanting some privacy.

[Anonymous]

It’s unfortunate that in the US there aren’t very many small studios available in most cities. Most people just want their own space and don’t care if they live in a closet if it saves them from sharing a bedroom with a stranger. In Asia you see a lot more small apartments

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s unfortunate that in the US there aren’t very many small studios available in most cities. Most people just want their own space and don’t care if they live in a closet if it saves them from sharing a bedroom with a stranger. In Asia you see a lot more small apartments

People are entitled to privacy and that entitles them to their own living space. It’s in the Constitution.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why people think that living with roommates is immature. I think it’s financially savvy. DH could have afforded a 1br, but he saved a ton of cash instead that we were able to use as a down payment on a lovely house. I also lived with roommates, and was able to put a ton towards retirement. If we’d both lived alone, we’d be in a much worse place, financially.

The most immature person I know felt entitled to live in a studio in NYC on $30,000 a year. Then she complained constantly about finances. I felt really embarrassed for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They didn't grow up with Golden Girls

And Threeʻs Company!

also:

Kate & Allie

The Odd Couple

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They didn't grow up with Golden Girls

And Threeʻs Company!

also:

Kate & Allie

The Odd Couple

Don’t forget Friends. Gen-X TV kid here, and pop culture taught me that having roommates is fun! The reality of it wasn’t always fun, but it’s good for learning how to compromise and coexist with other humans. I hate the thought of young people just hiding away by themselves with their screens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Somewhere between the 60s and 90s people turned into absolute psychopaths. You had roommates killing each other, roommates attempting to kill elderly home owners, neighbors turned out to be killers and crazy. That’s why!

Crime was much, MUCH more common in the 60s through the 90s than it is now.

Not where we lived!

[Anonymous]

Becuase roommates suck and anyone over the age of 30 shouldn’t be subjected to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They didn't grow up with Golden Girls

And Threeʻs Company!

also:

Kate & Allie

The Odd Couple

Don’t forget Friends. Gen-X TV kid here, and pop culture taught me that having roommates is fun! The reality of it wasn’t always fun, but it’s good for learning how to compromise and coexist with other humans. I hate the thought of young people just hiding away by themselves with their screens.

I don't actually think it is great to coexist within a home/apartment. Coexisting is hard even with families. I have a teen ds who wakes up at 5am...wakes me up. Dh goes to bed way too late...wakes me up. Sharing chores and various levels of comfort with cleanliness and clutter is hard as well. Compromise is sort of a myth when it comes to one's bio rhythms and habits: someone always sacrifices more and gets to experience discomfort. I live with it just fine because it's my family and I love them. Roommates I don't love? No, it would drive me crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I consume a lot of financial media and often see posts detailing how difficult it is for the typical person to afford life, then see an example budget breakdown and they’re showing someone on 65k/yr trying to live in a 1BR in HCOL area while driving a brand new car. Whenever people talk about housing affordability there’s NEVER any mention of just getting a roommate or sharing a house which is what most people actually do. Nobody is paying $2k month rent on a 65k salary.

Totally agree. When I was in my twenties I either loved with a roommate or with a boyfriend. My husband lived in a group house. We drove cheapo hand-me-down cars.