Bad choices

[Anonymous]

OK, OP, it's time to get DD to work -- there are great schools out there for her!

If interested in any stem, esp engineering -- UMBC tonight/tomorrow (as others have said). PITT may still be an option as earlier accepted students commit elsewhere.

For Engineering: WPI, Clark, Manhattan College, York College -- all have good programs and great merit it. Your kid should qualify.

For pre-med or straight sciences: St. Mary's College of MD and Muhlenberg are great options.

But, she needs to get cracking!

Finally, MC is a great system. Lots of kids from my kid's school are going there. There is no shame in MC to UMD!

Time to whip out the tough love and help her through this. She's a bright cookie. She's got this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Something similar happened to a student I know last year. He ended up taking a gap year and studied at a school abroad for several months and then spent the next 6 months volunteering in another country (not in Europe). He absolutely loved it and is at a state flagship now and doing very well. There are many gap year programs so it doesn’t have to be something you make up.

Sounds good for those who can afford it. Doesn't sound like that is situation for OP's DC.

[Anonymous]

PP, it sounds like something's going on at home. I'm sorry. You probably are having a hard time getting your head on straight.

Take a deep breath if you can. Whatever's happening, there are still good options open for your daughter. Look at that list of February deadlines. Pick:

- Two STEM-oriented schools (WPI and Rose Hulman?).
- A couple of smaller schools with low or no application fees. (no-fee schools I notice: College of Wooster, Sewanee, Rollins, Hendrix, Allegheny. Muhlenberg's is $50 -- all give amazing merit)
- A couple of state schools in locations where your kid might be happy: UNC Wilmington or URI or Colorado State, App State

Get the apps in. See what comes back. You will have options, and any of these will be great launchpads for STEM.

You can do this.

[Anonymous]

none of this is easy and everyone is tired. plenty of us are working on the Wisconsin app right now.

you could spend about 2-3 hours tonight and tomorrow and have a very different next 18 months to 4 years (ro beyond). or you could watch Netflix.

we can't want it more for you/your dd than you want it for yourselves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many really great options here.

Has the OP come back?

Hello All, OP here. Thank you for taking the time to provide suggestions and encouragement. I will go over them and try to find a way forward. If you have kids, you know, it is easier said than done. Not the end of the world, but there is still no joy, and I am very tired of the whole process.

That is really understandable. It's a difficult process.

Can you tell us a little about what your daughter wants, that might help us make more specific suggestions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many really great options here.

Has the OP come back?

Hello All, OP here. Thank you for taking the time to provide suggestions and encouragement. I will go over them and try to find a way forward. If you have kids, you know, it is easier said than done. Not the end of the world, but there is still no joy, and I am very tired of the whole process.

Hang in there—you all got this! If she can eke out 3-6 more apps tomorrow it will be worth it. You’ve gotten great suggestions here. Pick one two from each type/category. Then add in Wooster by 2/15. She will find her place!

[Anonymous]

No matter what, she needs to get that UMBC application in tonight! That will be her ticket out of the “bad choices” you listed.

Tomorrow, go for CNU, ODU, SMCM, WPI, Muhlenberg, and/or Rose-Hulman.

Add in Wooster later and then WVU if there is any steam left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Not bad stats 3.7 uw/4.6 w
Super EC

DC, Va or MD? Private or public?

[Anonymous]

or she needs to give you her log-in and you need to get the apps in. a lot of these apps don't require much more than what she's already done. don't write anything for these, but if she needs you to copy and paste some supps from another app, I think that's fine.

you are very close to having 3-4 options in April. then you can take those and try for more merit. it's a lot of money on the line, on top of the rest. just get them in!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately, it seems that my daughter will have to face one of these three choices: 1) go to an expensive university she does not like.; 2) go to community college for a year and aim for transferring ASAP; or 3) just work this year and try to do better next cycle. Suggestions?

Sorry to hear about your daughter's situation. I definitely wouldn't do 1. I think 2) CC to transfer sounds like a good option. I wouldn't do 3 as it's hard to keep those academic skills up. Other possibilities: Every year there is also often a list of schools with spots left to fill that you can apply to late.

There are also a LOT of schools with a 2/1 application deadline and some with a 2/15--so if she got her act together tonight, she could apply to some more to expand her possibilities:

https://blog.prepscholar.com/colleges-with-late-application-deadlines-complete-list

Good luck!

PrepScholar did not publish a “complete list.” They neglected all the regional schools. If she doesn’t mind Jesuit, have her apply to St. Joseph’s University in Philadelphia. Very underrated school.

Apply: https://www.sju.edu/admission/undergraduate

Recent kudos to alumni under 30:
https://www.sju.edu/30under30

And I’m assuming she’s a nice kid! St. Joe’s has a great community.

She may even be invited to Honors College with her stats. Let us know where she ends up, please!

[Anonymous]

This is truly the best of DCUM. Posters have given you amazing advice that is actionable now and will change the trajectory for your child. Put it to use, get excited, turn on some music, and help your DD get it done!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many really great options here.

Has the OP come back?

Hello All, OP here. Thank you for taking the time to provide suggestions and encouragement. I will go over them and try to find a way forward. If you have kids, you know, it is easier said than done. Not the end of the world, but there is still no joy, and I am very tired of the whole process.

OP, I have been there -- different situations, but joyless, and the kid just desperately wants to be done.

This is one of these moments where she needs you to muster the energy that she can't.

Don't worry about joy right now. You and she will find the path back to joy another day. Don't worry about "life lessons," or "keeping your chin up." None of that needs to happen today. For now, you're just going to open up that computer and click some buttons. That's it.

I hope you report back, and I hope you feel better about your choices when you do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Umass Lowell is locally very respected for STEM and engineering. Deadline is 2/5

All true, but also expensive for OOS and competitive admissions for OOS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:or she needs to give you her log-in and you need to get the apps in. a lot of these apps don't require much more than what she's already done. don't write anything for these, but if she needs you to copy and paste some supps from another app, I think that's fine.

you are very close to having 3-4 options in April. then you can take those and try for more merit. it's a lot of money on the line, on top of the rest. just get them in!

+1 True.
I agree. It’s not “cheating” if you’re just cutting and pasting info from other applications. At this point, IMHO, even re-using an essay she wrote for another school is on the table, (remember to change the name of the school of course)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d lean towards #2 (maybe she could also get a part-time job while taking a few community college classes).

Additionally, there are usually some colleges that will announce that they are still accepting applications in the spring for fall admission. Could be worth considering if other options haven’t panned out.

OP here again. The pain here is, as you may all know, that all this is more painful than it needs to be just because of peer pressure. In her mind, her classmates will not think highly of her if she goes to CC. Besides that, I think it is a great option....

I think this is interesting, because who cares what they think (at least who WILL care)-- but I notice my own kid seems inflienced by peer pressure, too -- sorry -- hope things work out. I'd do 2.