Recurring characters of DCUM, as written by a DCUM veteran

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Angry parent of "super high-stats" kid who was rejected from VT even though "he is smarter than 95% of other applicants." Makes me laugh every time.

Troll who spews absolute venom at Republicans and writes illiterate garbage in double-spaced screeds.

Totally warranted

You’re the troll, aren’t you.

The people who insist endlessly and perseveratively, that anyone who agrees with an OP (and not with them) is the OP sock puppeting, but when multiple commenters tell them “no, I’m not OP. Ask the moderator”), they go curiously radio silent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The bitter divorced dad who responds to any divorce/custody post about how women intentionally make she their ex-husbands aren’t able to parent and only want child support. Notable because he always comes in with capitalized Mom and Dad for the parents even if OP doesn’t specify gender. Also because he will not listen to reason.

I know who you’re talking about, but they seem to be a bitter second wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There used to be a woman who posted about being sad about not having mom friends. Anytime (I mean anytime) anyone would post anything about being lonely she would pop on and post about not having friends and she started many posts as well. She is married to a surgeon and they're both from the West coast and are estranged from family. They have one kid and she felt rejected from all mom's groups and then from kindergarten as well and was in therapy to try and understand why no one likes her. I feel like she must have posted 30 times over the course of years and then just disappeared. She was always identiable because she had a certain way of writing.
Anyone remember her? I wonder what happened.

She'll be back eventually. She goes through spates of posting and then disappears for a while.

(I have never commented on one of her threads, but I am almost sure I know her in real life.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The doc review guy from the Jobs forum. Although he hasn’t been around lately, so hopefully he took advice to find another job/field?

I hope so! He was so miserable and instantly recognizable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The 50+ yo mom of 5 who weighs 115 lbs, etc etc.,,

Lol - and they have a HHI of $100K but have saved “plenty” for retirement and college

Is this the same woman who has not worked in 30 years, has multiple grandchildren, has boasted numerous times that she bathed all five children nightly for their entire childhoods, etc. etc. etc... and is perhaps the most smug, obnoxious person who has ever posted here?

Omg I remember that poster. Is she the one that always brags that her 5 kids got full scholarships to SEC schools? I think she was a military wife?

Maybe? I do remember that they moved more often than average. I think the husband has retired now and they live somewhere PERFECTLY PERFECT for their PERFECT retirement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Brunch granny’s persona in the college forum: any time discussion of a gap year comes up, she panics that it will delay women making babies

Poster in the college forum who thinks Greek life is the end all be all and uses the terms “orbit” and “interloper” a lot

YIKES! I am well familiar with Brunch Granny, but don't frequent the college forum. That is legitimately insane. But yeah, she's super proud she and her daughter were up the duff knocking out kids by 21 so I guess it shouldn't be surprising.

Her stridency on this makes me think she probably is miserable, but she's so unpleasant I can't even entertain her unhinged ramblings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Norma Kamali poster in Beauty & Fashion. I love her. Someone will post a thread titled "I need something conservative and understated to wear to my DIL's baby shower" and NK poster will suggest a lime green lycra jumpsuit with fur trim and cutouts. At first it was mildly annoying but she's stuck with it and now I look forward to her posts.

The Langley Elementary booster who posts poetic odes to her favorite school.

RIP the DC school lottery Swami, who got chased away by people who were offended by her use of the term "swami." This is why we can't have nice things.

More than one person, but the person/people who will respond to even the mildest criticism of a husband in the Relationship forum with "Divorce him." I don't think it's good advice, but it's reliability is a DCUM staple.

Similarly, the people who will respond to any thread about dead bedrooms, keeping sex alive in a marriage, or sex post 40 or 45 by explaining how they do it like 2-3x a day, in their 60s, no problem. I don't believe them, but their insistence is funny to me.

Ah yes, the “Coven of Bitter Divorcees.”

They really REALLY hate men!

I think it’s the opposite. I think it’s a man/men saying basically “what are you gonna do, divorce him?”

[Anonymous]

What a sad post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The super nasty mom' who divorce (even if they had the affair and caused or choose to divorce) and then refuse to allow the Dad's very limited visitation and sever the relationship then demand Dad's pay 100% of all expenses on top of child support and 100% of college without consulting Dad on what he can all the while demanding full child support when the kid is living in the dorms and not with them.

Oh, you’re already here. Anyway, you. You’re the worst poster on DCUM.

-happily married, once, to my kids’ dad

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What a sad post.

+1. This poster always gives me a laugh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Angry parent of "super high-stats" kid who was rejected from VT even though "he is smarter than 95% of other applicants." Makes me laugh every time.

Troll who spews absolute venom at Republicans and writes illiterate garbage in double-spaced screeds.

Totally warranted

You’re the troll, aren’t you.

The people who insist endlessly and perseveratively, that anyone who agrees with an OP (and not with them) is the OP sock puppeting, but when multiple commenters tell them “no, I’m not OP. Ask the moderator”), they go curiously radio silent.

+1

I’m not “the troll”. Ask Jeff. More than one person on DCUM thinks Rs/red states are terrible.

[Anonymous]

The person who leaves a double space before periods in sentences, like this .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The super nasty mom' who divorce (even if they had the affair and caused or choose to divorce) and then refuse to allow the Dad's very limited visitation and sever the relationship then demand Dad's pay 100% of all expenses on top of child support and 100% of college without consulting Dad on what he can all the while demanding full child support when the kid is living in the dorms and not with them.

Oh, you’re already here. Anyway, you. You’re the worst poster on DCUM.

-happily married, once, to my kids’ dad

Wait it’s bitter divorced parent with insistent capitalism here! Please answer a question: are you a Dad or Mom or other? Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The super nasty mom' who divorce (even if they had the affair and caused or choose to divorce) and then refuse to allow the Dad's very limited visitation and sever the relationship then demand Dad's pay 100% of all expenses on top of child support and 100% of college without consulting Dad on what he can all the while demanding full child support when the kid is living in the dorms and not with them.

Oh, you’re already here. Anyway, you. You’re the worst poster on DCUM.

-happily married, once, to my kids’ dad

Wait it’s bitter divorced parent with insistent capitalization here! Please answer a question: are you a Dad or Mom or other? Thanks!

Typo fix…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The 50+ yo mom of 5 who weighs 115 lbs, etc etc.,,

Lol - and they have a HHI of $100K but have saved “plenty” for retirement and college

Is this the same woman who has not worked in 30 years, has multiple grandchildren, has boasted numerous times that she bathed all five children nightly for their entire childhoods, etc. etc. etc... and is perhaps the most smug, obnoxious person who has ever posted here?

Yes. I believe she also has a 24 inch waist.