In a dark place today: Life isn’t Fair

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life isn’t fair for a lot of people OP but you are not one of them. I get that you think life sucks right now not when you look at true unfairness around the world your life is not it. Yesterday someone on our buy nothing group posted that she knows of a teen in foster care who’s had a rough life is in need of a prom dress. She wants a certain color and size, did anyone have one. This 17yo in foster care should get to enjoy prom big she can’t because she can’t afford a dress. Her life is unfair. She is a child with adult struggles. Maybe you’re mean to have a healthy bio child , maybe not, but take fairness out if it.

You’re in the wrong forum, and your supercilious attitude has no place here, gtfo. We can always find someone who is doing or worse than us, so what. A struggle is a struggle. This is a supportive community; kindly eff off.

Wow. You really need to calm down and invest in therapy for your anger issues.

Whatever - someone came into the infertility forum to kick someone who was really down with a story unrelated to infertility. Not sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life isn’t fair for a lot of people OP but you are not one of them. I get that you think life sucks right now not when you look at true unfairness around the world your life is not it. Yesterday someone on our buy nothing group posted that she knows of a teen in foster care who’s had a rough life is in need of a prom dress. She wants a certain color and size, did anyone have one. This 17yo in foster care should get to enjoy prom big she can’t because she can’t afford a dress. Her life is unfair. She is a child with adult struggles. Maybe you’re mean to have a healthy bio child , maybe not, but take fairness out if it.

You’re in the wrong forum, and your supercilious attitude has no place here, gtfo. We can always find someone who is doing or worse than us, so what. A struggle is a struggle. This is a supportive community; kindly eff off.

Wow. You really need to calm down and invest in therapy for your anger issues.

Whatever - someone came into the infertility forum to kick someone who was really down with a story unrelated to infertility. Not sorry.

+1 that PP was horrible

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really struggling as I watch everyone around us begin and continue to expand their families. I’ve wanted a baby and a house and a family life since I was 27 years old! I am 36 now and while I was waiting to TTC as we were building our careers, others had already begun having babies, buying homes. Over the past 2 years I’ve had 2 ectopics and now I’m being referred to fertility clinics as the only way to have a baby. Meanwhile at this point even our younger siblings have started having babies and buying homes.

I’m a mess.

I feel empathetic toward you, OP. I got married at age 27 and wanted to have a baby since then. I finally got pregnant on my 10th IVF cycle at age 37+. My friends' kids were in middle school by then. It took me 3 surgeries, 6 clomid cycles, 6 IUIs, 10 IVFs and 2 surrogacies to finally get to the "pregnant stage". My insurance did not cover any infertility treatments, I had lost my savings and was at capacity on credit cards. Not to mention nosy in-laws and unsolicited advices. That phase of infertility was really dark.

Things that helped me navigate through depression:
I stopped following Facebook, distanced myself from friends who had babies, looked for hanging out with coworkers who were either childfree by choice or singles, and tried to stay as busy as I could with work and sports. My husband and my adopted pets saved me from going permanently underground.

Do you have any regrets? Presumably you don't have a support network or friends with kids but now you have a kid?

DP but nope, that's not what happened at all and no regrets. Many of those friends were so busy with their young kids anyway that they were barely socializing / didn't care. We could pick up where we left off. I was also honest with some re not being able to be there for them. There are seasons of life like that - I was reading water and in a dark place. I was staying silent to avoid saying something from a bad place that no one deserved.

Deleting FB from my phone was the very best thing I did.

[Anonymous]

Why can’t you buy a house?