What is the minimum salary you'd date?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Woman - make 200k+, I would date someone who makes $80k with limited debt, or upwards of $100k with "regular" debt (student loans/mortgage/healthcare). It's probably more tied to education level than money, I likely wouldn't date someone without a college degree. I don't want to support someone -but as long as they pay an income-proportionate share of expenses, I don't care. I am a single parent of young kids and prefer to date other single parents of younger kids, so I assume that most of our $$$ is going to kid stuff, anyway. It goes without saying that I would never ever date a man who doesn't provide for his kids.

how a man can provide for his kids on 80K income in DC? How would you date him, if your travel, entertainment options would be so limited (and lower than that you are accustomed to) because of that proportionate share of expenses?

I am in mid-40s and dated someone in his mid-40s who made about 80k (nonprofit) and had 50% custody of young kid who was very well provided for. I made triple what he made - also divorced with young kid -80% custody. It wasn't an issue. We both are homebodies who live simply, travel often, but cheaply, love to cook, etc. We both grew up in modest homes, so neither of us was "accustomed" to luxury.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

It depends on what that person did for a living and what we had in common. If he was a scientist/researcher who made little to no money, yes, absolutely. Struggling author who was trying to get published? Journalist? Sure. Someone with no education? Likely not. For me, it is the education level that is of greater interested rather than salary. I make the bulk of our HHI, though, so I'm not worried too much about what my DH brings in.

[Anonymous]

You don't date a salary.

You date a person.

This thread is transactional and gross. (Hope that you people all find each other, not people with genuine values!)

[Anonymous]

Man here. $0 as long as she’s hot, sane, and doesn’t have huge debt.

I’m single in my late 20’s making 350ish depending on stock price. I don’t mind her being a SAHM and raising the kids, but also don’t mind if she has a career and/or out earns me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I started dating my H in college, so zero? But I knew he was hard working (he did CS and applied economics while playing baseball), his family was well off and he was the most handsome dude I've ever seen in my entire life. His eyes are amazing, they change between blue, green, and light grey depending on what he's wearing and he has the juiciest lips and he's tall too. He's making around 4 now and I make 2. IMO, if I'd date now, I'd make sure that there are no addiction, gambling, high levels of debt before even thinking of income.

And I am making 20/year and my husband is Brad Pitt

No no, I meant 400 and 200. He's hotter than BP, BP is short. Mine looks like Kelly Slater.

Kelly slater is 5ft 9 and bald

OK, to be VERY specific my H looks like Kelly Slater but with hair and he's 6'1.

[Anonymous]

I never had a “salary minimum” for dating, that sounds awful to me.
But I did want to date someone intelligent, responsible, and had a drive/passion to pursue something in life while being able to make enough for a living. I was turned off by the dreamers who never wanted to work, or could not pull themselves together enough to finish college, or spent all of their earnings on frivolous things and lived in constant debt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

It depends on what that person did for a living and what we had in common. If he was a scientist/researcher who made little to no money, yes, absolutely. Struggling author who was trying to get published? Journalist? Sure. Someone with no education? Likely not. For me, it is the education level that is of greater interested rather than salary. I make the bulk of our HHI, though, so I'm not worried too much about what my DH brings in.

Ok good luck marrying a struggling educated author. I would probably first do a stone clad prenup/alimony waiver if I were in such position. I have a female friend who is urologist; at 48 she married a very nice phD college teacher who was making under 100K (she was making 600K). They had 2 kids and he was with children home. Then he cheated when kids grew up as he wasn't particular overloaded at job while she worked night shifts. A very messy divorce followed when they were in their 60s, 50/50 custody and she got a check from him for $7/month life-time alimony. She cried and borrowed money to fight but all in vain

Sorry I want to have a peaceful retirement. Men have lots of testosterone and will use it when they are not tasked being at home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women who demand $200k plus: how are you going to make that happen? What’s your plan? And don’t answer you already met you lawyer/MD husband in college. How are you going to make it happen now?

They aren't, because only hot women marry men 200k+ and hot women don't post on online forums for dinosaurs

+1

This is absolutely not the case if you believe the posts on DCUM. Literally every thread has a SAHM bragging about her DH’s 7 figure income and I cannot believe that they are all hot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

It depends on what that person did for a living and what we had in common. If he was a scientist/researcher who made little to no money, yes, absolutely. Struggling author who was trying to get published? Journalist? Sure. Someone with no education? Likely not. For me, it is the education level that is of greater interested rather than salary. I make the bulk of our HHI, though, so I'm not worried too much about what my DH brings in.

Ok good luck marrying a struggling educated author. I would probably first do a stone clad prenup/alimony waiver if I were in such position. I have a female friend who is urologist; at 48 she married a very nice phD college teacher who was making under 100K (she was making 600K). They had 2 kids and he was with children home. Then he cheated when kids grew up as he wasn't particular overloaded at job while she worked night shifts. A very messy divorce followed when they were in their 60s, 50/50 custody and she got a check from him for $7/month life-time alimony. She cried and borrowed money to fight but all in vain

Sorry I want to have a peaceful retirement. Men have lots of testosterone and will use it when they are not tasked being at home

You sound incredibly bitter, PP. I am married. Happily married for nearly 15 years. We live very comfortably. I married someone not for salary but for compatibility and shared interests. It worked out great. He's a gem. And guess what? I have a handful of anecdotes of friends who married millionaires and were also cheated on. One who was even left with a STD. So your story of a disastrous marriage is not income related - its scum bag related. That character trait crosses all income levels. So guess you better marry for character instead of income.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Woman: $300K if he's older than 50, around 200K if he's closer to 40. I am 44, my own income is $250K

serious question but doesn’t that kind of limit you to doctors, corporate lawyers and hedge fund traders? I work for a non profit making 130k and I didn’t realize I am considered low income by folks around here. Yes 300k is easier but I also have a decent house, which while no McLean mega mansion is a good house in a nice neighborhood, with a manageable mortgage. I also drive used cars, don’t spend money on luxury items etc. good thing I’m not single because clearly I couldn’t get a date with any DC women because clearly that isn’t enough.

But she makes 250K. Why does she have to date someone with a lower salary? Nope, there are lots of people making 200K or more in DC area: all GS-15 in the government with bonuses, all SES in the government with bonuses, all GS-13s and up at financial agencies, all fed IT contractors with seniority (we pay ours 250K), specialized nurses - a CRNA in DC makes 300K, most tech and medical sales, a lot of pharma sales, government consulting (booz allen pays around 250k), all therapists. I believe there are some in the FCSD making 200+ in administration. If you look at indeed, there are over 1000 positions open offering 200K or more within 25 miles of DC proper and almost 4000 within 50 miles, all full time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

It depends on what that person did for a living and what we had in common. If he was a scientist/researcher who made little to no money, yes, absolutely. Struggling author who was trying to get published? Journalist? Sure. Someone with no education? Likely not. For me, it is the education level that is of greater interested rather than salary. I make the bulk of our HHI, though, so I'm not worried too much about what my DH brings in.

Ok good luck marrying a struggling educated author. I would probably first do a stone clad prenup/alimony waiver if I were in such position. I have a female friend who is urologist; at 48 she married a very nice phD college teacher who was making under 100K (she was making 600K). They had 2 kids and he was with children home. Then he cheated when kids grew up as he wasn't particular overloaded at job while she worked night shifts. A very messy divorce followed when they were in their 60s, 50/50 custody and she got a check from him for $7/month life-time alimony. She cried and borrowed money to fight but all in vain

Sorry I want to have a peaceful retirement. Men have lots of testosterone and will use it when they are not tasked being at home

Yeah I call BS. Why would he be paying her alimony at all when she makes 6x as much? She should be paying him. Doesn’t matter that he cheated, men pay their cheating ex wives alimony all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

It depends on what that person did for a living and what we had in common. If he was a scientist/researcher who made little to no money, yes, absolutely. Struggling author who was trying to get published? Journalist? Sure. Someone with no education? Likely not. For me, it is the education level that is of greater interested rather than salary. I make the bulk of our HHI, though, so I'm not worried too much about what my DH brings in.

I'm married but if I were to become single, I'd be interested in dating someone who is successful but not necessarily highly educated, as long as he's not a red piller or conservative Republican - carpenter, woodworker, someone who owns a landscaping company or nursery, as my hobby (obsession?) is gardening. I have a grad degree from MIT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are all this women who have an abundance of dating choices that they get to filter out by salary? Do women in DC metro have that many options these days?

It wasn't like that in the 2000s when I was dating. I married a man in 2008 who made $65K. We now make HHI $600k.

You know that you can date and marry someone that you love, and then grow together, right? No wonder everyone is so miserable.

How old were you in 2008? These women don't have abundance of dating choices, they just dont want to make poor life choices that would make them even more miserable. It's easy to destroy someone's financial stability in divorce if you joined finances and then become a mooch.

I would rather not date at all than dating someone who is 50 y.o. and makes 60k/year. This is a huge red flag about that person intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills etc.

I was 29 in 2008 - same age as my DH. I'm going to bet that the vast majority of women on this board are not dating in their 50s. While there may be some, it does not constitute the majority of the dating scene.
My point is that excluding a really good match who otherwise meets all criteria based on salary alone is incredibly short-sighted and shallow - and probably why so many people remain single well into 40s/50s. My question is why you can't make your own money? Isn't that a huge red flag about intelligence, goal setting, financial planning, social skills, etc.? I rely on no one to do that for me.

I am no different from you: I married at 26, making $85K back then, my exH made about $120K. We divorced at 600K family income each of us retaining 50% of $5mm family assets.

Ok let me ask you this: if you get divorced in 2022, have your kids and the house, would you date someone making 85K at age 45-50 with a view of ever marrying this person?

It depends on what that person did for a living and what we had in common. If he was a scientist/researcher who made little to no money, yes, absolutely. Struggling author who was trying to get published? Journalist? Sure. Someone with no education? Likely not. For me, it is the education level that is of greater interested rather than salary. I make the bulk of our HHI, though, so I'm not worried too much about what my DH brings in.

Ok good luck marrying a struggling educated author. I would probably first do a stone clad prenup/alimony waiver if I were in such position. I have a female friend who is urologist; at 48 she married a very nice phD college teacher who was making under 100K (she was making 600K). They had 2 kids and he was with children home. Then he cheated when kids grew up as he wasn't particular overloaded at job while she worked night shifts. A very messy divorce followed when they were in their 60s, 50/50 custody and she got a check from him for $7/month life-time alimony. She cried and borrowed money to fight but all in vain

Sorry I want to have a peaceful retirement. Men have lots of testosterone and will use it when they are not tasked being at home

Yeah I call BS. Why would he be paying her alimony at all when she makes 6x as much? She should be paying him. Doesn’t matter that he cheated, men pay their cheating ex wives alimony all the time.

Of course she was made paying him alimony lifetime. If I was a man I wouldnt' have married anyone making 6times less either. This doctor woman did and she paid for that dearly. She now has to continue working until age 70 to maintain her lifestyle while paying him a lifetime alimony