Depressed about my kid

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:To be honest, OP, I majored in a "useless humanities major" at Harvard, and I'm doing fine. My major taught me to think, write, and analyze, which are skills that have served me well.

Also, I'm 42 now and recently started a new job: the H bomb on my CV still had full effect, for what it's worth. I'm sure this will work the same way for your kid if he does well academically and graduates.

Also had a useless humanities major (theology!) and am doing fine now. The key thing is young people learning how to figure out what they want to do and then doing the networking that will get them there.

Networking can’t get you a job you’re not qualified for unless you’re already wealthy and well-connected. Which we aren’t.

You'll be surprised at the extent that people will open doors for alums of elite schools. But if you're depressed now, I fear what might happen when your kid faces an actual challenge in their life.

Having a slacker kid on the couch is an actual life challenge.

If I were OPs kid, I would strive to be anywhere else. I predict this won’t happen.

This kid ain’t ever going home. Wouldn’t blame them one bit.

Actually, my kid has been home with me for the past 16 months since the pandemic started.

Well for the love of God, send her back! You need some space.

I could bore you with my eldest kids challenges but I won’t. All I can say is that you have no idea how lucky you are. Try and love your kid. You owe them that much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work in a law firm and am on the recruiting committee. Do you have any idea how many applicants have a humanities major on their resume before they went to law school? At least half, if not more.

Law school is where all my English major friends ended up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work in a law firm and am on the recruiting committee. Do you have any idea how many applicants have a humanities major on their resume before they went to law school? At least half, if not more.

Law school is where all my English major friends ended up.

Unfortunately DC has no interest in law school.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:To be honest, OP, I majored in a "useless humanities major" at Harvard, and I'm doing fine. My major taught me to think, write, and analyze, which are skills that have served me well.

Also, I'm 42 now and recently started a new job: the H bomb on my CV still had full effect, for what it's worth. I'm sure this will work the same way for your kid if he does well academically and graduates.

Also had a useless humanities major (theology!) and am doing fine now. The key thing is young people learning how to figure out what they want to do and then doing the networking that will get them there.

Networking can’t get you a job you’re not qualified for unless you’re already wealthy and well-connected. Which we aren’t.

You'll be surprised at the extent that people will open doors for alums of elite schools. But if you're depressed now, I fear what might happen when your kid faces an actual challenge in their life.

Having a slacker kid on the couch is an actual life challenge.

If I were OPs kid, I would strive to be anywhere else. I predict this won’t happen.

This kid ain’t ever going home. Wouldn’t blame them one bit.

Actually, my kid has been home with me for the past 16 months since the pandemic started.

Well for the love of God, send her back! You need some space.

I could bore you with my eldest kids challenges but I won’t. All I can say is that you have no idea how lucky you are. Try and love your kid. You owe them that much.

Just because your family has issues doesn’t mean my issues are less valid. Frankly, your comment has the same immaturity of “look at all the starving kids in Africa! Be grateful you have kids in the first place!” energy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your child has a 3.7 in philosophy at Columbia, you have absolutely NOTHING to worry about.

Philosophy is a VERY respected major. Among humanities, at most colleges it is one of the toughest. A 3.7 is nothing to sneeze at--especially after only 2 years. (Most students' GPAs go up their last 2 years.)

I don't know the median GPA at Columbia, but I seriously doubt it's a 3.8--probably more like a 3.6. I am absolutely positive that a 3.7 doesn't put you in the bottom quarter of the class. Even those in the bottom of the class will be able to get jobs.

Do you KNOW that the gpa was the reason your DC didn't get an internship? I doubt it. I assume there were lots of applicants and those who were successul have completed 3 years of college.

I think the GPA + useless major was part of it. The other reasons might be low relevant work experience in general (spent last summer working at Chipotle instead of at an internship) and weak ECs in college (only in fun/frivolous art clubs at Columbia and not in any serious academic or professional clubs). Most middle class Columbia students are aggressively building their resumes, taking useful classes, and finding relevant internships (both in the summer and during the school year).

Is there a reason why your kid doesn’t want to join all the other striver tiger cubs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be honest, OP, I majored in a "useless humanities major" at Harvard, and I'm doing fine. My major taught me to think, write, and analyze, which are skills that have served me well.

Also, I'm 42 now and recently started a new job: the H bomb on my CV still had full effect, for what it's worth. I'm sure this will work the same way for your kid if he does well academically and graduates.

Also had a useless humanities major (theology!) and am doing fine now. The key thing is young people learning how to figure out what they want to do and then doing the networking that will get them there.

Networking can’t get you a job you’re not qualified for unless you’re already wealthy and well-connected. Which we aren’t.

You'll be surprised at the extent that people will open doors for alums of elite schools. But if you're depressed now, I fear what might happen when your kid faces an actual challenge in their life.

Having a slacker kid on the couch is an actual life challenge.

If I were OPs kid, I would strive to be anywhere else. I predict this won’t happen.

This kid ain’t ever going home. Wouldn’t blame them one bit.

Actually, my kid has been home with me for the past 16 months since the pandemic started.

Wait until they graduate college. Bye crazy, mean mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I only hope that you are not telling your child that despite their achievement of getting admitted into an Ivy, you are disappointed, they have already peaked and that the subject that motivates them is useless.

Unless your goal is to become estranged from your child. In that case, you are doing everything right.

Fully agree. The most cruel and heart broken thing a parent can say to his child is "you have peaked and you are wasting your time doing the useless thing"
Please don't do that. And most likely you will be proven wrong as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only hope that you are not telling your child that despite their achievement of getting admitted into an Ivy, you are disappointed, they have already peaked and that the subject that motivates them is useless.

Unless your goal is to become estranged from your child. In that case, you are doing everything right.

Fully agree. The most cruel and heart broken thing a parent can say to his child is "you have peaked and you are wasting your time doing the useless thing"
Please don't do that. And most likely you will be proven wrong as well.

LOL as if OP will be proven wrong. Ivy grass with low GPAs and useless majors always end up being the most bitter, entitled, and underemployed people out there. OP, hope your kid enjoys downward mobility.

[Anonymous]

*Ivy grads not grass

[Anonymous]

Ok so your kid ends up middle class in a “normal” 120k job. But if he/she is happy, are you?

Their choices are not a reflection of you anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only hope that you are not telling your child that despite their achievement of getting admitted into an Ivy, you are disappointed, they have already peaked and that the subject that motivates them is useless.

Unless your goal is to become estranged from your child. In that case, you are doing everything right.

Fully agree. The most cruel and heart broken thing a parent can say to his child is "you have peaked and you are wasting your time doing the useless thing"
Please don't do that. And most likely you will be proven wrong as well.

LOL as if OP will be proven wrong. Ivy grass with low GPAs and useless majors always end up being the most bitter, entitled, and underemployed people out there. OP, hope your kid enjoys downward mobility.

Mean perhaps but very true

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok so your kid ends up middle class in a “normal” 120k job. But if he/she is happy, are you?

Their choices are not a reflection of you anymore.

Lol one person making 120k isn’t middle class

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't hire an IVY grad with a low GPA no matter which top Ivy they graduated from. That's a red flag that the couldn't care less and didn't put effort into the college work. There are so many other graduates to choose from--Ivy and non-Ivys--why should I take a chance on a low performing grad?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't hire an IVY grad with a low GPA no matter which top Ivy they graduated from. That's a red flag that the couldn't care less and didn't put effort into the college work. There are so many other graduates to choose from--Ivy and non-Ivys--why should I take a chance on a low performing grad?

+1

OP your kid will never be hired

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only hope that you are not telling your child that despite their achievement of getting admitted into an Ivy, you are disappointed, they have already peaked and that the subject that motivates them is useless.

Unless your goal is to become estranged from your child. In that case, you are doing everything right.

Fully agree. The most cruel and heart broken thing a parent can say to his child is "you have peaked and you are wasting your time doing the useless thing"
Please don't do that. And most likely you will be proven wrong as well.

LOL as if OP will be proven wrong. Ivy grass with low GPAs and useless majors always end up being the most bitter, entitled, and underemployed people out there. OP, hope your kid enjoys downward mobility.

Mean perhaps but very true

+1

OP, if I were you, I’d force my kid to switch to CS/Econ or make them drop out of school. Your kid is well on their way to being a bitter, entitled little prick.