Depressed about my kid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. I’d like to add that my kid is also depressed that he failed to secure an internship for the second summer in a row. When I told him he should switch to CS to make the search easier for next year, he refused and started pouting which was very immature of him. Super frustrating.

He or she?

Obviously a he; if the kid was a girl she could just marry rich

OP is a troll and keeps changing the gender.

Yep, and this troll can’t even come up with fresh material. Kept up the genderless pronouns for most of this thread, then suddenly male. Previously posted about DD who had been done robotics club and made it through linear algebra in HS thanks to PhD DH, but now won’t study STEM at Columbia. Blah, blah, blah. There is no DC. There’s probably no spouse. This all some morality play exhibiting proper parent behavior when confronted with a humanities major.

I remember that post! I wonder if OP is trying to write a book or something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

It does make them lazy. At a school with grade inflation like Harvard or Columbia, completing a CS major takes no natural intelligence — just work ethic and discipline. And for the record, most college students are lazy and not very hard working.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

Newsflash, there are people passionate about CS and they often turn up at prestige schools. If you want a CS grunt, there are more to be found at state schools. But OP's kid is neither.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

Newsflash, there are people passionate about CS and they often turn up at prestige schools. If you want a CS grunt, there are more to be found at state schools. But OP's kid is neither.

OP here. First, it’s rude of you to call state school CA majors “grunts.” But they are infinitely more employable than my humanities major kid. I’d rather have my kid be a “grunt” (whatever that means) than be a starry-eyed philosopher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

It does make them lazy. At a school with grade inflation like Harvard or Columbia, completing a CS major takes no natural intelligence — just work ethic and discipline. And for the record, most college students are lazy and not very hard working.

Bahaha

Most students fail out of college. Most students never even make it past their first year of college. Sorry, but completing a CS major at almost any school, let alone at an IVY, is hard AF.

So glad to hear you are the authority on who is lazy!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

Newsflash, there are people passionate about CS and they often turn up at prestige schools. If you want a CS grunt, there are more to be found at state schools. But OP's kid is neither.

OP here. First, it’s rude of you to call state school CA majors “grunts.” But they are infinitely more employable than my humanities major kid. I’d rather have my kid be a “grunt” (whatever that means) than be a starry-eyed philosopher.

This is going nowhere if you can’t distinguish between all and some. Most state school CS majors are talented and many are also passionate, but someone with no particular talent just determined to grind through a STEM degree is more likely to be found at a state school—the sort without direct admission. Simple enough. Prestigious programs (including flagships w ranked programs), on the other hand, will have more passionate students and more rigorous demands. OP is wrong, a DC who made it through difficult HS math with dad at his elbow, is unlikely to finish a CS degree at such a school, even with hard work. But there are schools where it would be possible with grunt work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

Newsflash, there are people passionate about CS and they often turn up at prestige schools. If you want a CS grunt, there are more to be found at state schools. But OP's kid is neither.

OP here. First, it’s rude of you to call state school CA majors “grunts.” But they are infinitely more employable than my humanities major kid. I’d rather have my kid be a “grunt” (whatever that means) than be a starry-eyed philosopher.

Your poor kid.

I want my kids to be happy and satisfied with their lives. And if they can achieve that by becoming a starry-eyed philosopher, more power to them.

The humanities and liberal arts enrich our lives. I am grateful for those who go into the fields you sneer at because the pay isn’t as high.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

It does make them lazy. At a school with grade inflation like Harvard or Columbia, completing a CS major takes no natural intelligence — just work ethic and discipline. And for the record, most college students are lazy and not very hard working.

Are you high or something? My kid is an applied math major ( not CS, but comparable). He graduated from a TJ like high school, took linear algebra and multivariable calculus there, and never had anything below A in math. Now, in a top 10 school he is fighting for every B+ and A-. He told me that at least half of the kids who originally intended to major in math switched their major because they couldn't handle it, that includes applied math.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

It does make them lazy. At a school with grade inflation like Harvard or Columbia, completing a CS major takes no natural intelligence — just work ethic and discipline. And for the record, most college students are lazy and not very hard working.

Are you high or something? My kid is an applied math major ( not CS, but comparable). He graduated from a TJ like high school, took linear algebra and multivariable calculus there, and never had anything below A in math. Now, in a top 10 school he is fighting for every B+ and A-. He told me that at least half of the kids who originally intended to major in math switched their major because they couldn't handle it, that includes applied math.

OP here. Thanks for mentioning this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

Newsflash, there are people passionate about CS and they often turn up at prestige schools. If you want a CS grunt, there are more to be found at state schools. But OP's kid is neither.

OP here. First, it’s rude of you to call state school CA majors “grunts.” But they are infinitely more employable than my humanities major kid. I’d rather have my kid be a “grunt” (whatever that means) than be a starry-eyed philosopher.

Your poor kid.

I want my kids to be happy and satisfied with their lives. And if they can achieve that by becoming a starry-eyed philosopher, more power to them.

The humanities and liberal arts enrich our lives. I am grateful for those who go into the fields you sneer at because the pay isn’t as high.

You can read about the humanities or liberal arts in your free time. But to spend $$$ for a degree in it is absurd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I had a long, hard talk with DC yesterday. Part of the reason why they don’t want to do STEM is because of their lack of “math confidence.” While they have always worked hard at math in high school, their math and science grades have been variable (B minus to A minus) while their humanities grades in high school and college have always been much higher. When I told them this was because of grade inflation in the humanities (not as much in STEM) and not because they were bad at math and hard sciences, DC wouldn’t believe me. I told them that I think they’d be able to reasonably handle STEM at their school if they just worked really hard, but his math and science confidence is shot.

This makes me so sad. DH (an engineering PhD) tutored this kid nearly every day in math in high school, so all that work has gone to waste now that my kid is in a fluffy major. We also made my kid do Science Olympiad and Robotics Team in high school, and he said that turned him off from STEM in college. This is disappointing, to say the least. Does anyone know how we can rekindle his interest in STEM and boost his confidence? Thanks.

Post this again next year like you do every year and you’ll get a better response?

“Re-kindle”? Nothing you’ve said suggests your kid ever had any interest in STEM.

Yep, OP you have his completely wrong. Your DC who was prodded through HS math could very likely make it through an engineering degree at some state school with the sort diligence you suggest. But studying math at Columbia? (or whatever the fiction we're entertaining is), the other students would mop the floor with your DC. They are passionate and driven, yours would flunk out for sure. Be glad he's got more sense than to put himself through that. Not that sociology, (or humanities) are necessarily easier, just those are fields people take up in earnest in college, and are suited to someone who needs a new direction.

Wrong. Few kids these days major in what they’re passionate about. Why do you think CS is the most popular major at Harvard? Do you think all those CS majors are passionate about CS? Some are, but most are in it for the career prospects. And they are diligent enough to work through a degree they aren’t all that interested in.

OP, your kid lacks diligence and work ethic. Were they lazy in high school as well?

Your first paragraph was fine.

But the bolded... I don’t know what to tell you. *Most* kids cannot handle majoring in computer science. It’s hard. That doesn’t make them lazy. Why is that so shameful to say?

Newsflash, there are people passionate about CS and they often turn up at prestige schools. If you want a CS grunt, there are more to be found at state schools. But OP's kid is neither.

OP here. First, it’s rude of you to call state school CA majors “grunts.” But they are infinitely more employable than my humanities major kid. I’d rather have my kid be a “grunt” (whatever that means) than be a starry-eyed philosopher.

Your poor kid.

I want my kids to be happy and satisfied with their lives. And if they can achieve that by becoming a starry-eyed philosopher, more power to them.

The humanities and liberal arts enrich our lives. I am grateful for those who go into the fields you sneer at because the pay isn’t as high.

You can read about the humanities or liberal arts in your free time. But to spend $$$ for a degree in it is absurd.

+1

OP, you’re in the right here.

[Anonymous]

Wow. I thought the reason people scramble to go to Ivies and the like is that you can major in whatever you want and be virtually set for life? That’s what you’d think from reading here.