I can't be friends with moms of 3+ kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 5 kids and have never paid more than 25 an hour for a babysitter. You have to try a lot of people and cast a wide net but eventually you get enough regulars to manage.

Let me guess - you live in panhandle Florida or Missouri or Ohio?

Are you insane?

I live in Bethesda. I’m not the previous poster but I’ve never met anyone who paid 60/hour for babysitting. I have 3 kids and $20 is considered generous.

For 2-3 hours?

OP specifically said $60/hour. That's what everyone is objecting to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 5 kids and have never paid more than 25 an hour for a babysitter. You have to try a lot of people and cast a wide net but eventually you get enough regulars to manage.

Let me guess - you live in panhandle Florida or Missouri or Ohio?

Are you insane?

I live in Bethesda. I’m not the previous poster but I’ve never met anyone who paid 60/hour for babysitting. I have 3 kids and $20 is considered generous.

For 2-3 hours?

OP specifically said $60/hour. That's what everyone is objecting to.

I didn’t say $60/hour. It’s $60 for a couple of hours. So how often do you think they go out if they live off one middle class salary with 3 kids? Not much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

All this makes me wonder why women sabotage themselves having 3-4 kids? Why do you do this to yourselves?

My second pregnancy resulted in twins. I had a hard time picking one to take home so ended up with both.

Haha. I’ve got 4 but no multiples. I think if you enjoy raising kids you don’t view building your family as self sabotage. People enjoy different things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 5 kids and have never paid more than 25 an hour for a babysitter. You have to try a lot of people and cast a wide net but eventually you get enough regulars to manage.

Let me guess - you live in panhandle Florida or Missouri or Ohio?

Are you insane?

I live in Bethesda. I’m not the previous poster but I’ve never met anyone who paid 60/hour for babysitting. I have 3 kids and $20 is considered generous.

For 2-3 hours?

OP specifically said $60/hour. That's what everyone is objecting to.

I didn’t say $60/hour. It’s $60 for a couple of hours. So how often do you think they go out if they live off one middle class salary with 3 kids? Not much.

Reread the first post.

[Anonymous]

You go out to a restaurant, you spend 60 dollars. So you go out half the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re old and have an only. We’re still ovulating and have fun fanilies. Can’t relate!

OP here. No, you're not fun. You don't have anything to talk about other than childcare. You're also always tired because you never get any sleep, but you spend your days cooking and cleaning and you complain all the time about your life. So why do this to yourself?

I’m an AVP at a Big Ten. I travel and am a Master’s swimmer. Bye! Sorry you can’t handle more than one lonely child.

This is horrible mean. It was kind of rude of OP to make judgements in her original post, but this is beyond the pale and really reflects poorly on you. Shame on you. So mean.

DP and I agree. OP is making unfair and nasty judgements about moms of 3+ kids, but so are the responders who are making fun of older moms or moms of only children.

WTF? All of you need to sit down and shut up. Bunch of nasty harpies.

+1000
42yo WOH mom of 2 young kids here. Definitely perimenopausal now, so thanks for all the older mom insults Every time I lament the fact that I don't have any close mom friends in the DC area, threads like this remind me of why I'm probably better off being alone. Everyone really is so nasty and catty here, aren't they?

[Anonymous]

This is the ugliest thread I’ve read in a long time. Ugly, ugly OP who brought out some real deep ugliness in moms of many.

OP, you are awful. I can’t imagine how you thought this was okay to post.

And those sneering at moms of onlies, you didn’t have to rise to the clumsy and obvious bait, and by doing so you hurt many people besides OP. Congratulations.

I’ve got an only and my best friend has three. We make it work because we love each other. We flex a lot more to accommodate her family’s needs, but that’s the way it goes. She’d do the same for me if I needed it. And they won’t be little forever. I hope to be friends long after the babysitter years are over.

[Anonymous]

I have a 4yo (only right now for the next 3 months) and my friend has a 4yo (only forever - they’re one and done). She spends every playdate attached to the hip with her kid, even though we could easily let them hang out in the playroom while we chat on the couch. It’s so annoying!! They’re 4, not 2! They can be alone for 15 min in a room 30 feet away

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is the ugliest thread I’ve read in a long time. Ugly, ugly OP who brought out some real deep ugliness in moms of many.

OP, you are awful. I can’t imagine how you thought this was okay to post.

And those sneering at moms of onlies, you didn’t have to rise to the clumsy and obvious bait, and by doing so you hurt many people besides OP. Congratulations.

I’ve got an only and my best friend has three. We make it work because we love each other. We flex a lot more to accommodate her family’s needs, but that’s the way it goes. She’d do the same for me if I needed it. And they won’t be little forever. I hope to be friends long after the babysitter years are over.

My particular demographic got called out/sneered at in this thread, but I didn’t get “hurt.” It’s this thing where I place zero value on DCUM other than to be sheer entertainment. If some support or inspiration happens to come through sometimes, I’ll take it. But I don’t read The Daily Mail looking for well-reported, definitely true-news—nor do I read DCUM as anything other than entertainment and general hilarity. Come on. If you are hurt by Random Poster #443 in a nasty thread like this, you need to work on security, and turn off your iPad and go call a real friend and reconnect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

NP. I’m laughing so hard as I forward this friend to my cousin. She’s a mom of four who was on “The Voice” a few seasons ago. We’ve got a girls’ trip to Nashville coming up.

Did you cousin sing or something? Is that an accomplishment to audition for a reality show? Well, I have to give her credit. At least she did something fun.

Um, yes my cousin sings. She didn’t just audition for “The Voice,” she made it through numerous rounds. She was on Team Kelly. She did really well and has tens of thousands of followers on Instagram and her YouTube channel. She also has performed onstage in the DC area numerous times, and has recorded with Alison Kraus and jazz singer Tierney Sutton.

Yeah, I guess you can say she “did something fun.”

living vicariously through your cousin much?

Nope, but I do stand up for her, and for other moms of 3+ kids who are doing interesting things and having fun, too.

As a mom of 2, no one has taken a shot at me, directly, in this thread. But I’m not going to stand around when just general dumbassery is lobbed about about moms of 3 or more, OR moms of only children, for that matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

All this makes me wonder why women sabotage themselves having 3-4 kids? Why do you do this to yourselves?

My second pregnancy resulted in twins. I had a hard time picking one to take home so ended up with both.

This was me, except triplets. No fertility treatments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the ugliest thread I’ve read in a long time. Ugly, ugly OP who brought out some real deep ugliness in moms of many.

OP, you are awful. I can’t imagine how you thought this was okay to post.

And those sneering at moms of onlies, you didn’t have to rise to the clumsy and obvious bait, and by doing so you hurt many people besides OP. Congratulations.

I’ve got an only and my best friend has three. We make it work because we love each other. We flex a lot more to accommodate her family’s needs, but that’s the way it goes. She’d do the same for me if I needed it. And they won’t be little forever. I hope to be friends long after the babysitter years are over.

My particular demographic got called out/sneered at in this thread, but I didn’t get “hurt.” It’s this thing where I place zero value on DCUM other than to be sheer entertainment. If some support or inspiration happens to come through sometimes, I’ll take it. But I don’t read The Daily Mail looking for well-reported, definitely true-news—nor do I read DCUM as anything other than entertainment and general hilarity. Come on. If you are hurt by Random Poster #443 in a nasty thread like this, you need to work on security, and turn off your iPad and go call a real friend and reconnect.

congratulations, have a cookie

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the ugliest thread I’ve read in a long time. Ugly, ugly OP who brought out some real deep ugliness in moms of many.

OP, you are awful. I can’t imagine how you thought this was okay to post.

And those sneering at moms of onlies, you didn’t have to rise to the clumsy and obvious bait, and by doing so you hurt many people besides OP. Congratulations.

I’ve got an only and my best friend has three. We make it work because we love each other. We flex a lot more to accommodate her family’s needs, but that’s the way it goes. She’d do the same for me if I needed it. And they won’t be little forever. I hope to be friends long after the babysitter years are over.

My particular demographic got called out/sneered at in this thread, but I didn’t get “hurt.” It’s this thing where I place zero value on DCUM other than to be sheer entertainment. If some support or inspiration happens to come through sometimes, I’ll take it. But I don’t read The Daily Mail looking for well-reported, definitely true-news—nor do I read DCUM as anything other than entertainment and general hilarity. Come on. If you are hurt by Random Poster #443 in a nasty thread like this, you need to work on security, and turn off your iPad and go call a real friend and reconnect.

congratulations, have a cookie

Oh, is this the maturity and kindness you are calling for? Hypocrite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re old and have an only. We’re still ovulating and have fun fanilies. Can’t relate!

OP here. No, you're not fun. You don't have anything to talk about other than childcare. You're also always tired because you never get any sleep, but you spend your days cooking and cleaning and you complain all the time about your life. So why do this to yourself?

I’m an AVP at a Big Ten. I travel and am a Master’s swimmer. Bye! Sorry you can’t handle more than one lonely child.

You're obviously an exception. Most moms struggle having a career and 3 kids. Many drop working because they can't afford to pay for 3 spots at daycare and keep up with demands of home and work life.

There are plenty of moms in this area with three or more kids who are thriving in their careers and find time for their own interests as well. The ones I know have husbands who are equal partners when it comes to household responsibilities. They are also very deliberate about what is worthy of their time and how to maximize it - like working out with friends early in the morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its not the number of kids its the age. I have a 5 and a 2 year old. If it was just the 5 year old i would do a lot more stuff. Bu the little one makes it harder. But only for a little while longer.

Agreed. The more kids you have the longer you are in the toddler stage. I have 4 kids and I usually don’t meet up with my friends with kids in tow because they are distracting and can be a lot to juggle when out. No big deal, my husband spends the afternoon with them while I’m out catching up with friends.

At the end of the day, people just prioritize different things in life and that’s fine. And I’m the sahm type (going back to work now at 33!) who I think OP has beef with. That’s ok! We don’t have to be friends.