Let Wife Pick Name?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I are expecting our first child - a boy - very soon. My wife has fallen in love with one name and really wants it for our son. I don’t love it but I also don’t hate it. We had 5 names and then cut it down to 3. I prefer another name but she really wants one of the others on our list. He will have my middle name. Should I just let my wife name our son the name she likes?

Please excuse me if this not the correct section. I wasn’t sure where to post this.

Is your son getting your last name? If so, given you don't hate it than let your wife choose. Can you share what the name is?

OP here. He will be getting my last name. She has my last name too. The name she loves in Connor. We are also considering Owen and Caleb. His middle name will be Matthew.

Was she born with your last name? Or did you already "win" that one because society presumes it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I are expecting our first child - a boy - very soon. My wife has fallen in love with one name and really wants it for our son. I don’t love it but I also don’t hate it. We had 5 names and then cut it down to 3. I prefer another name but she really wants one of the others on our list. He will have my middle name. Should I just let my wife name our son the name she likes?

Please excuse me if this not the correct section. I wasn’t sure where to post this.

Is your son getting your last name? If so, given you don't hate it than let your wife choose. Can you share what the name is?

OP here. He will be getting my last name. She has my last name too. The name she loves in Connor. We are also considering Owen and Caleb. His middle name will be Matthew.

Was she born with your last name? Or did you already "win" that one because society presumes it?

She took his name because he is the ruler of her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are people talking about the child getting OPs last name? This is super common. Almost all babies get their dads last name. This is not a new concept.

+1. People are acting like it’s so strange to give the baby the dads last name.

It's not being brought up because it's strange. It's being brought up because he already got 2 out of 3 names, and agreed to having this name on the short list, and his only argument is that it's not his "first choice." So he wants to choose the baby's first, middle, and last names, but he posts a thread titled "Let Wife Pick Name?" as though he's a poor browbeaten husband being steamrolled by a controlling monster.

GMAFB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I are expecting our first child - a boy - very soon. My wife has fallen in love with one name and really wants it for our son. I don’t love it but I also don’t hate it. We had 5 names and then cut it down to 3. I prefer another name but she really wants one of the others on our list. He will have my middle name. Should I just let my wife name our son the name she likes?

Please excuse me if this not the correct section. I wasn’t sure where to post this.

Is your son getting your last name? If so, given you don't hate it than let your wife choose. Can you share what the name is?

OP here. He will be getting my last name. She has my last name too. The name she loves in Connor. We are also considering Owen and Caleb. His middle name will be Matthew.

Was she born with your last name? Or did you already "win" that one because society presumes it?

She took his name because he is the ruler of her.

Whatever. I took my husband's name because my dad abused me and I didn't want his name anymore.... people have their own reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I are expecting our first child - a boy - very soon. My wife has fallen in love with one name and really wants it for our son. I don’t love it but I also don’t hate it. We had 5 names and then cut it down to 3. I prefer another name but she really wants one of the others on our list. He will have my middle name. Should I just let my wife name our son the name she likes?

Please excuse me if this not the correct section. I wasn’t sure where to post this.

Is your son getting your last name? If so, given you don't hate it than let your wife choose. Can you share what the name is?

OP here. He will be getting my last name. She has my last name too. The name she loves in Connor. We are also considering Owen and Caleb. His middle name will be Matthew.

Was she born with your last name? Or did you already "win" that one because society presumes it?

She took his name because he is the ruler of her.

g
Whatever. I took my husband's name because my dad abused me and I didn't want his name anymore.... people have their own reasons.

DP. Yes, people do have their own reasons. But whatever those reasons are, this baby will have OP's middle name and last name. Why shouldn't his wife get to have some part of them name that's from her, even if it's just because she loved it and not because it's a family name?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

Do you not listen to this crazy lady, OP. You’re fine and there is nothing wrong with wanting to pick a name you both agree on. He’s just as much your child as he is hers. Ignore the patriarchy and sexism stuff on this board.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

It’s not sexist to want to agree on a name. Everybody so fake woke these days that words like sexism are thrown around so much these days that it loses its true meaning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

Do you not listen to this crazy lady, OP. You’re fine and there is nothing wrong with wanting to pick a name you both agree on. He’s just as much your child as he is hers. Ignore the patriarchy and sexism stuff on this board.

Yes ignore the patriarchy ( a word you clearly don't understand the meaning of) and sexism while you pander to op because he's a man

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

It’s not sexist to want to agree on a name. Everybody so fake woke these days that words like sexism are thrown around so much these days that it loses its true meaning.

They both agreed on the short list of three names they like, they just have different favorites within that list.

[Anonymous]

Let your wife choose! We have a tradition of doing our best to name someone after a relative even if distant. But, it has to be a name that we like. My son is named after my father, and both daughters are named after great grandmothers. I have a granddaughter whose first and middle name are her great grandmothers and it is so beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

It’s not sexist to want to agree on a name. Everybody so fake woke these days that words like sexism are thrown around so much these days that it loses its true meaning.

No I’m pretty sure the true meaning of sexism includes “thinking you get your #1 choice of all three of your child’s names because you’re the male parent” which is precisely what this was a case of.

[Anonymous]

I'd feel differently if OP hated the name he doesn't it was actually on his shortlist. It's just not his favorite . His wife feels strongly about the name he should concede.

I'd feel the same if genders were reversed.

[Anonymous]

Geesh, the OP asked for advice and received a lecture and morality lesson. I wouldn’t look at it as one person picking a name but a joint decision, you both agreed on the muddle name and are so close to picking the first name. Whether it be Caleb, Owen or Connor, you will know when you see him. In the meantime, as a team, sound out all name combinations and go with the one that sounds most natural, usually it will be your first choice from the beginning. Enjoy this time and congratulations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. What are the names? So many people are picking the ugliest and weirdest names. I feel bad for the kids.

OP here. This is a little rude. Names are Connor ( her pick), Owen, and Caleb ( my pick). Middle name will be Matthew.

Owen is terrible. I've never met a well-behaved Caleb. Connor is the best choice here. If it's one of your top five, you should let her pick from those. It's not like she's trying to go rogue and name the kid Augustus or something.

OP here. Well people have different opinions. We both like Owen. A name has little to do with a kids behavior. It’s the parent, not the name.

That’s true.

Good on you for realizing you should agree to your wife’s first choice. I can promise you you will love it when the name means your baby (my baby was my third choice name and I love it very much now — this doesn’t work when someone digs in on a terrible name). I do still hope you apologize for some of the knee jerk patriarchal behavior, your wife will appreciate it, as you see in these comments people hold on to hurt feelings around naming for years. Here’s another thing that’s about the parents: are you going to raise Connor with the same preconceptions you brought to this naming process? Because as you’ve probably seen, those aren’t seen in a really positive light anymore, and more and more children (like my daughter) are being raised to see them for the institutionalized sexism that they are. Do Connor a favor and demonstrate genuine egalitarian parenting for him.

Do not listen to this crazy lady, OP. You’re fine and there is nothing wrong with wanting to pick a name you both agree on. He’s just as much your child as he is hers. Ignore the patriarchy and sexism stuff on this board.

Sure seems fair - as long as you also start from square one on the middle and last names, giving your wife an equal vote on those and are open to you and baby taking her last name.